RelaX

My attempt at a little Chuck Palahniuk imitation, although at the end I kinda got bored so I wrapped it up a little too quick.
Anyway, enjoy and let me know what you think.

'Word'

You disgust me, complacently reading this.
You take your precious minutes and squander them on fiction.
In your private little trance, secluded from the world by mere words. None of this is original, every word you are now reading is the amputated part every story ever written. Recycled and repainted to look original and fresh.

Tune in. Drop out.

What you are about to find here is an account of everything gone wrong, of how no matter what you do, you'll never get what you want. How people are constantly disappointing and how not even disappointment is what is what it used to be.

The old days.

Everything began with trying to show a friend how I am the shit and trash of the world. How nothing you can ever accomplish really amounts to everything.
It started with just a couple of words. A couple of words on a dirty napkin in a rundown bar in the worst part of town. He needed to know. He needed to know that creation is just another way of destruction. So I wrote him a poem. Not like a love/gay kind of poem but a stupid little poem on stupid little bees. That’s when it began, right there.

“Hey, that’s pretty good”

All I wanted to show him was how we know nothing and never will. How not owning anything is the greatest blessing in the world. Imagine where we are as the bar from hell. Imagine heroin-junkies avoiding it because it is ‘below their standards’.
We don’t live anywhere near here, nor do we work even close to this place.
All I wanted was to hit bottom. You can’t hit bottom in a suburban neighbourhood where bottom is just a word parents use around their children instead of ass.

“No it isn’t, I’ve just destroyed a perfectly good napkin with insensible gibberish”
“If you say so dude” he looks around and puts his mouth on his shirt and sucks on some stain. “Anyway, let’s go, I don’t like this place.”

Lord save me from my friends.

Next day I come back with a page full of nonsense. He reads it and he says it again. Imagine me walking away. It isn’t good. Good is for other people. Good is what you want, when you want it, until the moment you get it.

You don’t have to get this the first time.

How you make ink is you boil 12 parts distilled water. Add 3 parts ground oak galls. After 15 minutes, add the ferrous sulphate. Pour through a filter. Separately, add a small portion of the liquid to the gum Arabic. Make sure the gum Arabic dissolves completely. Add this to remaining liquid. Add egg shells to neutralize the pH of the ink.

Nobody ever said writing was easy.

A week later I get a letter. Some nameless suit from some never heard off magazine loved the story. And wants to place it for $2,000. Imagine surprise. Imagine wonder. Imagine sudden realisation. But most importantly don’t really imagine anything new.

Don’t even think I said no, don’t even think I would stop my own embarrassment, don’t even think I waited around for that one story to flop. A friend is just a threat you haven’t woken up to. More and more, the postal services delivered my letters and ‘manuscripts’ to the highest acclaimed publishers in the country. And more and more I got less and less rejection slips back.

I was awake and heading straight into my own trap.

Jump to the end of this story and end up being a best-selling author in 13 countries. My ‘literature’ in countries you haven’t even heard of. Jump to where a first edition with signature goes out for about a gazillion times what the paper and ink is actually worth.

This isn’t about writing but on how shame is only real if you chose to be ashamed and no crime is committed without a second party, success is it’s own kind of failure.

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The most likely way for the world to be destroyed, most experts agree, is by accident. That's where we come in; we're computer professionals. We cause accidents.
- Nathaniel Borenstein

][)ick}{ea][)

That was enjoyable to read. You're good.

"Good is what you want, when you want it, until the moment you get it."

"Success is it's own kind of failure"

Classics.

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Basically, if you don't agree with everything I say... you're stupid.

J.R.V.A.

nice..........

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And as she plays,
her sweet song of laughter
floats through the air
and warms my heart