merlin

You are in a group of strangers, talking and having a good time. It's a casual environment. But suddenly, you feel a sudden bloating in your abdomen. You knew you shouldn't have eaten those burritos before you left home. It's inevitable; you have to let it go.

You try the 'ol let it out slowly trick. But fate is not merciful today. The force of the expelled gases nearly takes off the seat of your pants. To say it was audible is an understatement.

What do you do?

mackyroo

Laugh, and say "woo.. didn't mean to do that"

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Official Bullshit.

snowy

If you can laugh at yourself, that shows strength and a good sense of humor So if you are able to do that, you'll be fine

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Biscuit Buns

LOL - Mackyroo said it.

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Martian

Not really an alternative on that one and with Crohn's disease, it's all too plausible a scenario. You laugh about it. Everyone else will be laughing, why shouldn't you?

EDIT - what I mean about CD, is that I have it, and therefore this isn't a hypothetical for me, but rather reflection on past events.

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I wake up in the morning more tired than before I slept
I get through cryin' and I'm sadder than before I wept
I get through thinkin' now, and the thoughts have left my head
I get through speakin' and I can't remember, not a word that I said

- Ben Harper, Show Me A Little Shame

Axiom_e

I grin sheepishly get embarassed and say "My mom always told me, " A good ass will let you know" and "Whever you may be let the wind flow free"."

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merlin

haha, I was just wondering. Hope this never happens to me =)

StanT

Farts are funny, laugh it off.

What's your alternative, anyway?

IC3

Ask for a lighter

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maleficent

Agreed -- sometimes you just can't help yourself... (not that I've ever done that... ) People willlaugh, you might get harassed for a bit, but oh so what - bodily functions are funny (Yes, I have the sense of humor of a 12 year old boy)


You could get poetic

Beans Beans good for your heart
Beans Beans they make you fart
the more you fart, the better you feel
so eat beans at every meal...

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lindseylatch

man, it's way more embarassing to fart during sex than at a party...and my S/O and I laugh about that.
And about how spoon position makes me burp. that's our new euphamism for sex "burping" each other.

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ngdawg

Party at my house. Talking to my cousin's wife and showing a silly dance move-as I did it, I tooted. She asked if that was part of the dance, I said, yep!
Love me, love my farts....IBS, it's a wonderful thing

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TexanAvenger

I'd sheepishly apologize, then suggest the group move about six feet upwind.

la petite moi

"Beans, beans, the musical fruit. Sorry for the stench, guys."

Ishmal

"beans, beans, the musical fruit, the more you eat, the more you toot"

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"Despite the high cost of living, it remains popular."

merlin

Haha, I love these suggestions. Now I'm prepared if this ever happens.

My bio teacher once put it this way:

Bean beans, they're good for your heart;
The more you eat, the more you fart.

stevie667

say safety, then laugh and challenge someone else to best you.

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hrandani

Haha. Right, take pride in the breadth and distinction of your odours.

I don't think I would have the balls to be able to laugh it off, though. And people tell my my farts are terrible : (

thingstodo

I would just say "$20 bucks if you can catch that and paint it green!"

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If you're wringing your hands you can't roll up your shirt sleeves.

Stangers have the best candy.

Johnny Pyro

I would die from ebarrassment. If ther was a girl around, It would be worse.

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odu_sonar_AE

Guess it depends on the makeup of the group. If it was a bunch of guys, I'd blame it on the guy next to me, or announce that my inner demon had something to say. If there were any girls at the table, I'd apologize for the rudeness of my inner demon.

streak_56

I would go for the classic, blame it on someone else.

micah67

Damn dog...!

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~micah

VitaminH

Seeing as how I'm known amongst my friends for my bodily functions, I'd probably just raise my hand and go "Yeah that was me. Fair warning."

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"Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever."
- Napoleon Bonaparte

Daniel_

Turn to the most easily embarassed person in the group and say in a heavy stage whisper "Don't worry dear, they all think it was me that did it"

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╔═════════════════════════════════════════╗
Overhead, the Albatross hangs motionless upon the air,
And deep beneath the rolling waves,
In labyrinths of Coral Caves,
The Echo of a distant time
Comes willowing across the sand;
And everthing is Green and Submarine
╚═════════════════════════════════════════╝

Willravel

"Did anyone else feel that earthquake?"

What would I do? I would excuse myself and go to a dark alley and sob for hours as my precious ego and the strangers sense of humor both were seriously lackcing.

skinnymofo

"oops" and grin
if in a car a roll down the window as well.
occasionally a growl and a pat on the stomache

im fairly experienced in this

Minx

In this situation there is nothing you can do but to laugh at yourself!

My boss let's loose some real stinkers - he just grins like a little kid and giggles! I swear that man can clear a room with his farts!

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sapiens

I would probably say "Oops! Sorry about that!", blame it on someone else (jokingly, of course), or say "...and that's all I have to say about that!"