Meeting people/building relationships - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

Battlefield · 11-26-2004, 09:39 PM

I'm sure there is a thread like this but I couldn't find it through the search function.

What are everyone's tricks to meeting new people? I have a serious gf and I work long hours. Most of my friends from high school/university have moved to other cities. Co-workers are friendly but most of us are so different we aren't friendship material. I'm thinking joining a charity/doing volunteer work is a start, but there has to be a bunch of other ways.

Even when you do meet people it's tough to become friends unless you really hit it off...seems like I need repeated exposure before I can become friends with someone.

Zeraph · 11-27-2004, 11:41 AM

I'm basically in the same boat.

Here's a volunteer link though: http://www.volunteermatch.org/

I don't think there is much you can do about it, just stay open and be straight forward with people, and be friendly.

maleficent · 11-27-2004, 11:59 AM

I've used volunteermatch for years. I can't say as I have met any life long, nearest and dearest friends, but that's not really me. I hve had a lot of pleasant experiences, met some nice people, and been able to be a do-gooder for a while. Got a do-gooding event coming up next Saturday that I'm really looking forward to.

Go to your local library and sign up to be a volunteer, volunteers can do anything from helping folks with computers, to reading to children, to helping older kids with their homework, or just plain old stacking books.

You could also try taking a class, something that interests you. Either thru a community college, or continuing education that a lot of towns offer. The classes can range from wine tasting/education, to cooking classes, to needlepoint or knitting, to changing the oil in your car -- the ones thru the towns are generally pretty inexpensive and cater to working schedules.

Become a regular at some places, like the local coffee shop and get to know people.

Basically -- get out of the house... People aren't going to get to know you unless they have an opportunity to meet you.

Carno · 11-27-2004, 01:38 PM

I dunno man, I go to college, and I work, so that's how I meet people.. Plus I meet people through friends.

Outside of school and work I don't really meet anyone..

maleficent · 11-27-2004, 03:04 PM

If you play any sports... Look into league sports, bowling, softball, soccer... most towns have them. Or coach little kids... that'd be another way to get yourself out and about.

Rodney · 11-27-2004, 05:15 PM

The best way to get to know people is do join with them in some shared project: volunteer work, sports, even classes or study groups can do the job. They may or may not turn out to be people you want to hang with, but how will you know that if you don't get to know 'em first?

The cool thing about meeting lots of people in shared activities, even if you don't get close, is that after a while you start running into people you know in more and more places. Which gives you an automatic social entrez to whatever they're involved in and the people they're hanging with. In other words, the more new people you get to know, the easier it gets to know more new people.

11-26-2004, 09:39 PM	#1 (permalink)
Battlefield Crazy	Meeting people/building relationships I'm sure there is a thread like this but I couldn't find it through the search function. What are everyone's tricks to meeting new people? I have a serious gf and I work long hours. Most of my friends from high school/university have moved to other cities. Co-workers are friendly but most of us are so different we aren't friendship material. I'm thinking joining a charity/doing volunteer work is a start, but there has to be a bunch of other ways. Even when you do meet people it's tough to become friends unless you really hit it off...seems like I need repeated exposure before I can become friends with someone.

11-27-2004, 11:59 AM	#3 (permalink)
maleficent Junkie Moderator Emeritus Location: Chicago	I've used volunteermatch for years. I can't say as I have met any life long, nearest and dearest friends, but that's not really me. I hve had a lot of pleasant experiences, met some nice people, and been able to be a do-gooder for a while. Got a do-gooding event coming up next Saturday that I'm really looking forward to. Go to your local library and sign up to be a volunteer, volunteers can do anything from helping folks with computers, to reading to children, to helping older kids with their homework, or just plain old stacking books. You could also try taking a class, something that interests you. Either thru a community college, or continuing education that a lot of towns offer. The classes can range from wine tasting/education, to cooking classes, to needlepoint or knitting, to changing the oil in your car -- the ones thru the towns are generally pretty inexpensive and cater to working schedules. Become a regular at some places, like the local coffee shop and get to know people. Basically -- get out of the house... People aren't going to get to know you unless they have an opportunity to meet you. __________________ Free your heart from hatred. Free your mind from worries. Live simply. Give more. Expect less.

11-27-2004, 03:04 PM	#5 (permalink)
maleficent Junkie Moderator Emeritus Location: Chicago	If you play any sports... Look into league sports, bowling, softball, soccer... most towns have them. Or coach little kids... that'd be another way to get yourself out and about. __________________ Free your heart from hatred. Free your mind from worries. Live simply. Give more. Expect less.

11-27-2004, 11:41 AM	#2 (permalink)
Zeraph Banned Location: The Cosmos	I'm basically in the same boat. Here's a volunteer link though: http://www.volunteermatch.org/ I don't think there is much you can do about it, just stay open and be straight forward with people, and be friendly.

11-27-2004, 01:38 PM	#4 (permalink)
Carno Junkie	I dunno man, I go to college, and I work, so that's how I meet people.. Plus I meet people through friends. Outside of school and work I don't really meet anyone..

11-27-2004, 05:15 PM	#6 (permalink)
Rodney Observant Ruminant Location: Rich Wannabe Hippie Town	The best way to get to know people is do join with them in some shared project: volunteer work, sports, even classes or study groups can do the job. They may or may not turn out to be people you want to hang with, but how will you know that if you don't get to know 'em first? The cool thing about meeting lots of people in shared activities, even if you don't get close, is that after a while you start running into people you know in more and more places. Which gives you an automatic social entrez to whatever they're involved in and the people they're hanging with. In other words, the more new people you get to know, the easier it gets to know more new people.