la petite moi

Yeah, it's definitely not polite to use that word.

My story is: my sister always uses that word. She just throws these discriminatory names around, jokingly making fun of people of different races or skin colour.

Okay, I know I have probably made more than a few racist jokes before, but I don't do it all the time. Now my sister on the other had DOES.

I don't know how to get her to stop. She doesn't seem to get that even if her friends don't mind when she uses those words, and joke about them, that other people are offended.

How should I present my argument to get her to stop?

timalkin

I don't know about your sister, but some people use "racist" names to describe the filthiest and all around worthless examples of a particular race.

I personally use the word "cracker" and "trailer trash" to describe the toothless, wife-beating, welfare recipients that I see.

The word "wetback" can be used to describe various hispanic gangbangers and their baby daddy.

The regular folks of any race don't get any special names. They're just regular people.

Rodney

The way I see it, all those derogatory names are family names -- that is, you can use them if you're part of the group, in a derogatory or teasing fashion. But not outside.

Once I worked on a job where the receptionist was black and really, really, hot, and a really together person besides. We dated a little. Anyway, she hated exercise and I dared her to go on a run around on the block with me, and she said, "Only if you don't mind having a dead nigger on your hands." She got to use it, and I'm glad she felt I was friend enough to use it with me. But I'd never use it, and I don't think she'd understand -- unless we'd started a relationship or something.

My relatives on one side are Portuguese, and they're always calling each other "Dumb Portagees." If someone not Portuguese or a friend called them that, though, they _really_ wouldn't like it.

Same with names like "trailer trash" or "poor white trash." I think Anglos can use them, because they're names for their own race.

In short: in practice, only the ethnic groups that those derogatory names describe can use those names, or people who they know very well. Otherwise, could be fightin' words.

la petite moi's sister is doing what she's doing because she's just doin' it with her friends. But eventually somebody's going to call her on it. I don't think there's any other way to get her to stop -- in public, anyway -- until she has a bad experience. And eventually, she will.

tikki

I personally think rap music has lessened the severity of the word. It is such common place in most of today's rap that if you listen to that type of music, you don't really think of it as the N-word.

No, I don't go around calling people it, but I also don't gasp when I hear it.

__________________
Take notice. Take interest. Take me with you.

la petite moi

Yeah, I don't gasp either, though I'm afraid one day she's going to get called on it. Someone is going to be offended and there's going to be a big deal over it. Yeah, she uses it with her black friends, but also with me, and with her white friends and asian friends....it's...just not right, I don't think. The word n*gger goes WAAAAAY back.

To me, it's like calling something stupid 'gay'...that's...just dumb and offensive!

Mael

while "we" have become desensitized to hearing it, pretty much any black person that isn't a friend, if they over heard it, would have a huge problem. as someone said above, you can use it if you in that group, but otherwise it's gonna cause a problem.

lpm, don't tell you sister to stop using it. she probably won't listen to that. her use of it now is probably a bit of a phase, like it's the word of the month or whatever. but try to get her to understand that using it in public is a big no-no and if she says it at the wrong time, could make her life rather unpleasant.

Rodney

Sounds like you all live in a fairly protected cocoon of a place -- middle-class suburbs, maybe? If so, she might get off easy for a long time. Until she goes someplace a little less forgiving.

I grew up in a blue-collar town, and if you mouthed off at anybody or called any kind of derogatory name, you were in for a fight. So, except for one or two assholes who were bigger than everybody else and knew they could get away with it, most people kept a civil mouth. I'm talking teenagers here. But I'm of the impression that there are a lot of sheltered kids out there today that don't have my "advantages" (rubs a couple of long-vanished bruises). A friend of mine used to say, "Where the fists are slow, the mouths are fast." And I'm thinking people don't watch what they say if they don't think anybody's going to get serious about it. But someday, someone will.

To this day, I try not to say anything about anybody that I wouldn't or couldn't say to their faces, even on the 'net. Okay, I fail sometimes, but I try.

Crazy/Beautiful

After she gets her ass beat or chewed out for saying that she'll learn. Because she better believe I and many other people would say something about it. In the South those kinda words aren't taken lightly. Them's fighin words! as we say.
I never use any discriminatory remarks about ANYONE!! You might not like what someone does but don't bring race into it, that's just ignorant. Plus racial slurs make you sound like a redneck hick and I actually don't even associate it people who use them. Tell she's sure not to make many friends in the future if she perisists with that

thingstodo

I agree. One ass-kicking and she may stop. I doubt there is anything you could say or do. In fact, it might just exacerbate the situation. She thinks she is cool and will use it until it's not cool anymore.

Language always depends on the people you are communicating with. And not many folks can get away with that one. I hear it betwwen blacks more than anyone else, and that is mainly in the movies and in songs.

And yes, I live in the sheltered suburbs. But then, I'm an old fart!

__________________
If you're wringing your hands you can't roll up your shirt sleeves.

Stangers have the best candy.

Glory's Sun

to me the word applies to any person of any race that by their actions deserves to have the word applied to them. It basically means slow, dumb or stupid. So if I know someone who is slow dumb or stupid..yup that's what they are

absorbentishe

There's probably nothing you can do to teach her, it's a mistake she'll keep making until A she looses a job, B gets beaten or raped by group, or C she just grows up. I was working with this dude that started saying that for everyone, but especially black, not to their face but about them, well I warned him someone was going to hear it and he'd loose his job. Sure enough, he said it to the wrong person, and bingo, out the door on his ear he went.

Ryan

Being a white male i never use the term "nigger." towards anyone. I understand the roots and origins of the the word, and I feel i would be out of place by using it in any manner of daily speech.

Thats just my opinion however.

ninety09

Honnestly, I don't see how that word is any worse than "bitch", "whore" or other insults like those.. but people seem to get a lot more offended by "nigger" :/

Cynthetiq

all racial epiphets are signs of ignorance, no matter who uses them.

__________________
I don't care if you are black, white, purple, green, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, hippie, cop, bum, admin, user, English, Irish, French, Catholic, Protestant, Jewish, Buddhist, Muslim, indian, cowboy, tall, short, fat, skinny, emo, punk, mod, rocker, straight, gay, lesbian, jock, nerd, geek, Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, Independent, driver, pedestrian, or bicyclist, either you're an asshole or you're not.

StormBerlin

I'm reading a book about affirmative action, written by a black man with a college degree. The book touches on how blacks use victimology as an excuse to blame white people for their shortcomings (for lack of a better word). A story in there describes a man who was the Mayor of DC's right hand man. He used the phrase "niggardly" in front of his two coworkers (one was black). Now, this guy was forced to resign. The funny thing is, niggardly doesn't have anything to do with the word nigger. Niggardly was a word used by the vikings that means greedy or stingey. Even though his superiors knew what he meant, he was still forced to resign for fear of offending a certain group of people. Land of the free indeed.

__________________
"if anal sex could get a girl pregnant i'd be tits deep in child support" Arcane

Astrocloud

I think the cure for your sister or whoever -is to have her listen to some DMX where they throw "nigga" around like it's cool. I think that the last thing that racist white people want is to seem cool in the ghetto. (That's my opinion anyways and I'm still not cool in the ghetto)

Sparhawk

I don't have anyone I consider a friend, black or white, who uses that word around me. They would lose respect if they did...

P.S. They rehired the aide who said 'niggardly'.

__________________
"In Iraq, no doubt about it, it's tough. It's hard work. It's incredibly hard. It's - and it's hard work. I understand how hard it is. I get the casualty reports every day. I see on the TV screens how hard it is. But it's necessary work. We're making progress. It is hard work."

Cynthetiq

and because of the PC police we can thank them for making everyone just a little more racist... AND ignorant.

__________________
I don't care if you are black, white, purple, green, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, hippie, cop, bum, admin, user, English, Irish, French, Catholic, Protestant, Jewish, Buddhist, Muslim, indian, cowboy, tall, short, fat, skinny, emo, punk, mod, rocker, straight, gay, lesbian, jock, nerd, geek, Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, Independent, driver, pedestrian, or bicyclist, either you're an asshole or you're not.

timalkin

You realize that you just used a racial slur right? *redneck hick*

It seems like people only get offended at being called names when the names are accurate descriptions of them.

alkaloid

Yes this is an excellent point. Black people either beat up or rape women who offends them. I'll try to remember that the next time I go to the ghetto for my crack cocaine.

Mael

because crack cocaine is only sold by black people in the ghetto, right?

World's King

Before you read this you have to understand that I am not racist. I am simply fed up with ignorance.


If the world is gonna embrace the term "white trash" then we should also embrace the term "nigger."


You know what I wanna hear... You know how in TV, Music, and Movies there is always the white guy that either tries to rap or dance and he says, "I'm so white." I want a black guy on BET (Black Entertainment Television) that's trying to discuss a white topic such as skiing or the stock market to stop and say, "I'm sorry... I'm so black."

Why is it okay to make fun of white people? Huh? I know were lame. The only dance and music we ever made up was polka. Okay, we lose on that one. But if you all are gonna make fun of my suits, the NY Times, and paid vacations... then I'm gonna make fun of your bling (whatever the fuck that is?), rollin' on dubs, and Source magazine.



Get over it.

__________________
heavy is the head that wears the crown

eotlemac

i say it and i dont really care. ive been saying it since i was like 12 and my uncle taught me racist jokes.

I guess i felt it was ok because i got called a cracker whenever i played basketball with these minority kids at our rec center.

i try not to get offended over words, everyone else should do the same

Manic_Skafe

It's just as wrong to make fun of "white" people as it is "black" people. I find it funny that you attempt to refute the "it's cool to make fun of white people" argument with stereotypes. That's like winning a gun control debate but shooting the opposition.

Race is a concept created in the minds of morons and reinforced by laws. It's so deeply ingrained into us all that it's natural for all of us to accept the concept of race as an irrefutable truth. But I think we all know that just because a lot of people believe in something - doesen't make it valid or right.

Every aspect of the concept of race should be rejected seeing as how it was created to elevate certain people above other people. By choosing to accept any aspect of the concept of race you're also choosing to accept all the stereotypes and underlying hatred that comes along with the whole concept of race.

Stop defining everything and realize there's so much more to all of this than what we're defined by.

And to be on topic, I've come to the realization that words can only do but some much - somethings just have to be learned from life experiences. Let your sister do what she wants - nothing teaches you to watch where you walk better than a brick wall in your path.

__________________
"Porn is a zoo of exotic animals that becomes boring upon ownership." -Nersesian

bermuDa

race isn't the invention of morons, racism is.

Making fun of stereotypes in a jocular manner doesn't concern me, it's when someone is serious about it.

__________________
I am the very model of a moderator gentleman.

analog

He was obviously being sarcastic to prove a point, which is that the whole idea of using words to identify people by way of stereotype is stupid. Using stereotypes is ignorant, whether it's aimed at white people, black people, or purple people.

World's King

You all get one more response from me.


Whatever.

__________________
heavy is the head that wears the crown

Manic_Skafe

So how was race created? Is it something created by nature? I think not. Outside of the minds of people race doesen't exist. Just like the money we believe in - outside of the fact that we believe the money has value - it's worthless.

__________________
"Porn is a zoo of exotic animals that becomes boring upon ownership." -Nersesian

Cynthetiq

just look at the variations with the animal kingdom take for example leopards, mountain lions, panthers, and jaguars to see your answer.

__________________
I don't care if you are black, white, purple, green, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, hippie, cop, bum, admin, user, English, Irish, French, Catholic, Protestant, Jewish, Buddhist, Muslim, indian, cowboy, tall, short, fat, skinny, emo, punk, mod, rocker, straight, gay, lesbian, jock, nerd, geek, Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, Independent, driver, pedestrian, or bicyclist, either you're an asshole or you're not.

Hanxter

while this is an interesting topic of what is accepted by some and not by others, i would suggest, please, we try to keep this as objective as possible and in an appropriate manner.

i know you all are mature enough to do just that - thanx

World's King

Okay... you win. I'm gonna have to keep talking. First off... The money we use in the USA has value. It is backed by the gold kept in Fort Knox. As for other countries... I have no clue.

Race was not made up by someone for evil use. It was the name we gave to that level. It keeps us separated from each other. The reason someone has dark skin is years of evolution protecting them against the sun. Which separated them into a different race then the ones with light skin. It's a scientific term. It's not a term we put on a form of hate. Now, the act of racism is. That’s the act of hating someone just because they are a different race then you. Okay? I am in no way trying to justify racism. But you have to understand the basis of it before you can denounce it as stupidity. Okay?

And in reference to what Cynthetiq has just said. Look at it this way. Racism for animals would be like a panther hating a leopard because it had spots.

__________________
heavy is the head that wears the crown

KellyC

call her a bitch all the time and ask her how she feels, then explain thats what other people would have felt when she uses racial slurs. I tried this and DAMN! it works

__________________
Him: Ok, I have to ask, what do you believe?
Me: Shit happens.

LewisCouch

I wonder when professional sports will lose their affinity for offending Native Americans? How about the Florida Crackers or the Washington Niggers, or maybe you prefer the Portland Trail Monkeys? Are you offended? I know I am.

__________________
"The gift of liberty is like that of a horse, handsome, strong, and high-spirited. In some it arouses a wish to ride; in many others, on the contrary, it increases the desire to walk."

-- Massimo d'Azeglio

irseg

I'm amused. That'd be funny. Reminds me of how a couple years back, some Indians got all offended about being stereotyped by basketball teams, so they formed the "Fightin' Whities" with a guy in a suit & tie as a mascot. It was supposed to make some point about stereotypes and offend white people, but instead everybody thought it was great.

Angel

You don't use racial slurs in my home...no way, no how. I don't care who you are! Nobody speaks with such ignorance in my place.
Bring her to stay with me for a week....

__________________


In the depth of winter, I finally learned that there was within me an invincible summer.
~Albert Camus

Cynthetiq

link

Our mission statement is as follows for the Fighting Whites:

The Fighting Whites basketball team was organized in early February (2002) by a group of Native American and non-Indian students of the University of Northern Colorado with the intent of playing intramural basketball. We came up with the "Fighting Whites" logo and slogan to have a little satirical fun and to deliver a simple, sincere, message about ethnic stereotyping. Since March 6, when our campus newspaper first reported on the "Fighting Whites", we have been launched into the national spotlight, propelled by a national debate over stereotyping American Indians in sports symbolism.

Our objective as students was to make a straightforward statement using humor; to promote cultural awareness through satire. Now that national attention has come to us, we hope that our message will reach a wider audience. As a part of our involvement in this ongoing issue, we have formed the Fighting Whites Scholarship Fund, Inc., a non-profit organization, the profits of which will go entirely to support the education of Native American students

__________________
I don't care if you are black, white, purple, green, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, hippie, cop, bum, admin, user, English, Irish, French, Catholic, Protestant, Jewish, Buddhist, Muslim, indian, cowboy, tall, short, fat, skinny, emo, punk, mod, rocker, straight, gay, lesbian, jock, nerd, geek, Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, Independent, driver, pedestrian, or bicyclist, either you're an asshole or you're not.

scout_sniper03

Geez, it's just a fuckin word. If somebody gets pissed over a word, they can suck my left nut and make my right one jealous.

Angel

scout_sniper03.... I simply answered the question that was asked. As did many other people in a similar manner. No need to lash out at anybody for their personal opinion. We are all adults here with various views. I try to respect others even if they are vastly different from my own, yours obviously is. No big deal to me.
Oh, I'll pass on sucking the nut thanks, they will both have to remain jealous.

__________________


In the depth of winter, I finally learned that there was within me an invincible summer.
~Albert Camus

MSD

I go to an urban school. I hear the words N***** an d"Negro" thrown around without any offense intended or taken. I hear racial slurs used to describe everyone. One of my friends is nicknamed "Tyrone" because of his resemblance to the character from Pulp Fiction. From his presence, many of my friends throw around racist language without a second thought; nobody means to offend, nobody takes offense. I'm one of the few who refuses to use those words. In most cases, I believe that if we all refused to be offended by words, they would cease to be offensive, but I refuse to lower my standards and use the language of hate.


Race is a collection of superficial physical differences created by the evolution of various people to be better suited to their environment in various parts of the world; the total genetic difference between you and any other racial group is approximately 0.000017% or less, if I remember correctly.

The gold standard was ended by the Nixon Administration.

Assuming she's mature enough to see a bit of violence (and Ed Norton being gang-raped by neo-nazis,) watch American History X with her. Tell her that I recommend it to anyone who doesn't think that hateful speech is a problem. Mention that friends who do it aren't right. Watch her reaction as Spoiler: a kid is gunned down in a school bathroom because he didn't realize the harm that came from his hateful views unti lit was too late. See if she gets the point.

This is one of the best descriptions of racism I've ever heard. I'm going to use this whenever the subject comes up.

World's King

Thank you. It really came from what Cynthetiq said... he gets the credit on that one.

__________________
heavy is the head that wears the crown