Jesus Pimp

Where I work at, people are always talking all day. They make their rounds every day talking individually or in groups. How do people do it? Is there really that much to talk about? What's the secret? Is there an art to conversing about nothing? I would like to know. I would like to be more social.

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Cynthetiq

Seinfeld made a whole show about conversing about nothing.

It's not that they aren't talking about nothing. They are usually talking about what is happening in the world, other people's lives, their own lives.

Usually a good conversationalist is well read on several topics so that they can converse on just about anything at great length. The other part of the equation is even if you have a topic to speak about, do you want to actually talk to people? My best friend is very intelligent we have great conversations, but he doesn't like talking to strangers.

My old job required me to roam around the building and talk to everyone. Everyone from the janitors to the President of the company. I had to ebb and flow and be ON all the time. It wasn't hard, just sometimes I didn't want to be ON, but that was part of my job. Things I'd talk about, upcoming events, projects, issues, current events in the news, current events in the other person's life.

I'd take in clues from their desks like pictures of animals, babies, locations.

The best converstationalists will tell you the easiest way to converse with someone is to get them to talk about themselves.

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Thraeryn

A good way to keep a conversation going, too, is to relate to the person you're talking to. Share a short version of something similar that happened to you, then take interest in how your reactions to the situation were similar/different. Don't talk TOO much. Just let them know that you're a person like they are, and get them talking about the next thing.

Jesus Pimp

I like talking to people but not to the extent that my co-workers do. I tend to get bored or annoyed talking for an extended period of time.

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Sleepyjack

Most of the time i am thinking about something and i tend to overanalyse everything (mainly nonsensical topics) to excruiating detail and generally can talk about that for hours.

Its always good to ask questions and get the other people involved in what they want to talk about, mainly themselves or their experiences. Cynthetiq pointed this out. Although if you're not really interested in what the other person has to say, then that's probably when you become bored or frustrated.

I generally have a few random thoughts floating in my head just to add to the conversation, although the nature of the conversation does have lots of variables.

Remember, you can always talk about the weather.

geep

You need to make it more challenging. Try to make at least one person smile today. Try for two tomorrow.

Cynthetiq

maybe they are doing it because then they don't have to do "WORK" and being bored doing that is much better than actually having to work...

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I don't care if you are black, white, purple, green, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, hippie, cop, bum, admin, user, English, Irish, French, Catholic, Protestant, Jewish, Buddhist, Muslim, indian, cowboy, tall, short, fat, skinny, emo, punk, mod, rocker, straight, gay, lesbian, jock, nerd, geek, Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, Independent, driver, pedestrian, or bicyclist, either you're an asshole or you're not.

hobo

I love talking for long periods of time. It is hard for me to just start talking to strangers but if I have an IN person (someone who can bridge the gap) then I'm usually ok.

I find that talking in smaller pieces at a time works better because when one person talks for too long, the conversation will get boring quickly unless you are a good listener. If you don't have too much to say then just say something that will spark the other person(s) into saying something. If you like to talk a lot then find someone who is a good listener to speak to.

On topics, just talk about life, news, anything you can think of. The more you know, the more you can talk about.

David2000

I'm one of "those" people. Just ask questions about whatever comes to your mind and BE CURIOUS. If you show interest in what someone is talking about, they'll do more of the talking and then you'll have more to ask about--you can just keep going for hours and hours that way.

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hobo

Also, don't stay on a topic too long. Find ways to transition into other topics. If one topic is hit too long it'll either get boring and everyone will leave or a vicious debate will begin and everyone will leave mad.

*Nikki*

I can talk for hours upon hours on the phone. Hell I can even listen for hours and hours.

I guess you just either love it or hate it.

bernadette

when i was younger i could talk to my girlfriends on the phone for hours. now talking on the phone for any length is a great irritation, even though i still love my girls... it's just another chapter in the same ol' same ol'... it's a bit nicer when i can meet up with them face to face.

but then i am a short attention span kid. i hafta be trapped on a cross country flight to get me to read books.

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irseg

I'm not very talkative unless I'm talking to close friends, or in a political discussion.

I went to a party at my boss' place. He knows I'm normally not the most social person around, so he was pretty amused when I got into a 3+ hour long political debate with another guest. Only reason it ended that early was it got to be about 6:30 am and we were falling asleep. We didn't even have the chance to get into economics.

I had a girlfriend who always talked about stupid little petty crap so I could just say "ohhh..... uh huh.... yeah.... " periodically and that was enough to keep the conversation going. She'd call when I was asleep and I'd actually talk to her in my sleep. She never even noticed, and the only either of us would find out is when she'd bring up something we apparently discussed or agreed to do and I had no clue what she was talking about.

mb99usa

I have problems holding long conversations unless I'm really interested in the topic. I tend to make a few comments and move on if I can.

Everybody is different, just be yourself.

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