Moving, moving... She's moving.
 

This is kind of a complicated situation, but I met this woman about 3 years ago. My wife and I had already separated and had started talking divorce, about a 14 months later we had filed, and I'm still dealing with it to this day - final in June if she can manage to keep her head on straight.

The woman I met had a guy she was living with, she asked me more then once if I wanted to move in with her, if I wanted to be with her, and of course I did, I just couldn't - I wasn't ready to commit myself to anyone or anything - and I definitely did not want to drag her into my divorce which has been a living hell since it started. I wasn't going to walk away from my home, still pay for it and not live in it - plus my son lives there with me. I don't want her living in the house, which my wife has keys too, and still frequents because of our child - I don't want the drama.

Anyway, this woman stayed where she was, we spent a lot of time together, I do love her, and she's simply amazing. It's a once in a lifetime thing, I'm sure of that. It's been talked about between us many times.

But she told me 2 weeks ago shes leaving. The guy she lives with is moving to Oregon and asked me in July when my divorce was final, if I was willing to move there. Of course I'm willing to move there to be with her - but she's leaving with him. I have a problem with that.

Needless to say, I'm really not sure what to do. All I have to do is say yes, I'm ready to commit to something, and go there and I can have the woman that has been a gigantic part of my life through this. I want to share my life with this woman. The biggest problem, is my son - he's here. I wouldn't be.

I don't know what to do. I love her, I want to spend my life with her, but I can't commit to make a choice, and she's leaving with a guy she tells me she doesn't even like - he records her, snoops through her cell phone bill, all kinds of weird shit. But she's still going.

I don't quite understand. She's moving to Oregon with the roomate? What's their relationship?

Sounds like there's more to their relationship than you are willing to admit, and that it's time for you to move on.

I'd say the relationship with your son should rule your decision. She may be great and all, but she seems to be manipulating you with this move thing. Let her go, stay with your son.

Children first. He doesn't have a choice. If she really is everything you say she is, she wouldn't be leaving.

I second manipulation. If she's been living with someone else for the past 3 years she could just be using you to keep her life interesting in one way or another. Perhaps this isn't the case, but its happened to me in the past.

You have a son. His love for you is greater than anything this woman has to offer.