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Old 08-31-2005, 10:30 PM   #1 (permalink)
Junkie
 
SirLance's Avatar
 
Location: In the middle of the desert.
I need a push!

A man and his wife are awakened at 3 o'clock in the morning by a loud pounding on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push.

"Not a chance," says the husband, "it is 3 o'clock in the morning!” He slams the door and returns to bed.

"Who was that?" asked his wife.

"Just some drunk guy asking for a push," he answers.

"Did you help him?" she asks.

"No, I did not, it is 3 o'clock in the morning and it’s pouring out there!"

"Well, you have a short memory," says his wife. "Can't you remember about three months ago when we broke down, and those two guys helped us? I think you should help him, and you should be ashamed of yourself!"

The man does as he is told: he gets dressed, and goes out into the pouring rain. He calls out into the dark, "Hello, are you still there?"

"Yes!" comes back the answer.

"Do you still need a push?" calls out the husband.

"Yes, please!" comes the reply from the dark.

"OK. Where are you?" asks the husband.

"Over here on the swing!" replies the drunk.
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Old 08-31-2005, 10:57 PM   #2 (permalink)
Wicked Clown
 
Ishmal's Avatar
 
Location: House Of Horrors
hee hee hee

that was an unexpected twist...

i like it!
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Old 08-31-2005, 10:59 PM   #3 (permalink)
Evil Priest: The Devil Made Me Do It!
 
Daniel_'s Avatar
 
Location: Southern England
Like it
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╔═════════════════════════════════════════╗
Overhead, the Albatross hangs motionless upon the air,
And deep beneath the rolling waves,
In labyrinths of Coral Caves,
The Echo of a distant time
Comes willowing across the sand;
And everthing is Green and Submarine

╚═════════════════════════════════════════╝
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Old 09-01-2005, 10:20 PM   #4 (permalink)
Upright
 
gamefreak1398's Avatar
 
hehe that was good
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Old 09-03-2005, 05:16 PM   #5 (permalink)
Banned
 
Zeraph's Avatar
 
Location: The Cosmos
Not bad.
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Old 09-29-2005, 12:01 AM   #6 (permalink)
Insane
 
5757's Avatar
 
Location: Vegas!!
...

Made me LOL.
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Old 09-29-2005, 10:05 AM   #7 (permalink)
Psycho
 
zaiaz's Avatar
 
Location: State of confusion...wait that's medication.
ARRRRRRRGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH! Help me up off the floor.
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Old 10-04-2005, 08:51 PM   #8 (permalink)
Junkie
 
loganmule's Avatar
 
Location: midwest
funny, but I hate it when stories of me get out like this
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Old 10-05-2005, 08:44 PM   #9 (permalink)
2+2=5? Not again!
 
MichaelFarker's Avatar
 
Location: Dallas, Texas
yesss ... push him one first at a time
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