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Old 07-05-2005, 08:24 PM   #1 (permalink)
Junkie
 
Location: 1 mile from Ground Zero
Shortly after her wedding...

Shortly after her wedding, the newlywed wife is complaining to her mother about her husband's insatiable sexual appetite. "He wants to do it 15 times a day, anytime, anyplace, anywhere -- on the table, on the stairs, on the sofa, in the car, in the morning, in the afternoon, and in the evening. I can barely walk anymore!"

The mother advises her daughter to tell him that she has her period, which seems like a good idea.

So that evening, when the husband comes home from work, he proceeds to undress himself and his wife, when she stops him.

"I'm sorry sweetie, but it's that time of the month."

The husband gets up, looks at his wife, and says, "It's all good honey. I understand." He puts on a robe and walks away.

The wife is somewhat surprised at the mature reaction of her husband, until a few minutes later he returns holding two glasses and a bottle of champagne.

So she asks, "What's going on, dear?"

"We're celebrating!" he replies.

"Celebrating? What exactly are we celebrating?" she asks.

"Anal sex week!"


Glad
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Old 07-05-2005, 11:34 PM   #2 (permalink)
Evil Priest: The Devil Made Me Do It!
 
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Location: Southern England
New one to me. Very funny.
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Old 07-06-2005, 08:37 AM   #3 (permalink)
Free Mars!
 
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Location: I dunno, there's white people around me saying "eh" all the time
Aw man, I feel bad for her
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Old 07-06-2005, 10:38 AM   #4 (permalink)
Upright
 
Man, my wife says it is exit only.
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Old 07-06-2005, 02:46 PM   #5 (permalink)
Junkie
 
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Location: In the middle of the desert.
Hysterical! Suprise "ending" and all!
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Old 07-07-2005, 01:11 AM   #6 (permalink)
In Your Dreams
 
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Location: City of Lights
hahgahaha that was great. Thanks.
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Old 07-07-2005, 04:38 PM   #7 (permalink)
Tilted
 
Location: Massachusetts
I had never heard that one before. Good one!
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Old 07-07-2005, 07:25 PM   #8 (permalink)
Addict
 
that was great, I know someone who'd love that.
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Old 07-08-2005, 03:21 PM   #9 (permalink)
Searching for the perfect brew!
 
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Funny as hell! Thanks
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Old 07-09-2005, 11:59 PM   #10 (permalink)
Upright
 
Location: San Francisco
And I thought I had heard them all. Great joke.
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Old 07-11-2005, 09:09 AM   #11 (permalink)
Upright
 
ohhhh man that is great, now she wont be able to sit
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Old 07-11-2005, 09:58 PM   #12 (permalink)
Tilted
 
Location: I am not living.
Wow. Is that what you are supposed to do when it is that time of the month?
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Old 07-12-2005, 11:01 PM   #13 (permalink)
Vroom!
 
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Location: Toronto
hope she got one of those O-Ring pillows as a wedding gift.
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Old 07-16-2005, 10:06 PM   #14 (permalink)
Junkie
 
Location: 1 mile from Ground Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by t3m3st
hope she got one of those O-Ring pillows as a wedding gift.
A donut ring cushion, hahaha!

Glad
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