Bill O'Rights

1. Does a clean house indicate that there is a broken computer in it?

2. Why is it that no matter what color of bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?

3. Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

4. Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

5. On electric toasters, why do they engrave the message "one slice"? How many pieces of bread do they think people are really gonna try to stuff in that slot?

6. Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?

7. Why is it that no plastic garbage bag will open from the end you first try?

8. How do those dead bugs get into those closed light fixtures?

9. Considering all the lint you get in your dryer, if you kept drying your clothes would they eventually just
disappear?

10. When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, "It's all right?" Well, it isn't all right so why don't we say, "That hurt!"

11. Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?

12. Is it true that the only difference between a yard sale and a trash pickup is how close to the road the stuff is placed?

13. In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?

14. How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?

15. If at first you don't succeed, shouldn't you try doing it like your wife told you to do it? And obviously if at
first you don't succeed, then don't take up sky diving!

16. The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends, if they're okay, then it's you.

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It is indisputable that true beauty lies within...but a nice rack sure doesn't hurt.

Redlemon

Conversely, why can I spend five minutes looking for something in the fridge, but when my wife stands up to help me find it, it instantly appears?

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God of Thunder

That has bugged me for years.

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streak_56

Great one... I have often wondered.

vanblah

Look closer. There should be an arrow that points to whichever slot they intend for single slice toasting. If not, then that's a good question.

Rangsk

17. Why is it that even though the title of this joke is "questions without answers," I still had the nagging urge to come up with answers to most of them?

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sub zero

Should be added...if you tie a piece of toast butter side up to the back of a cat, what would happen if you dropped him?

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Delvid

That is right on about opening those damn plastic bags.

bookie05

one for us of a younger generation. How come applejackes dont taste like apples? lol

gshibly

You would have a cat with butter on his back, most likely also having the toast jammed in his crack. Just my opinion, never tried it.

Artsemis

the cat and the butter bread would hover slightly above the ground. dont try this, it may make the cat dizzy if spinning occurs.

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- Artsemis
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There are two keys to being the best:
1.) Never tell everything you know

Blackthorn

If Tarzan was really King of the Jungle....why the hell did he always call his chimp a cheetah?

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lordkos

Lol number 8 is mine

bigdaddy19

Good point