Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community  

Go Back   Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community > Interests > Tilted Humor


 
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 10-22-2004, 11:56 AM   #1 (permalink)
Upright
 
Location: ga
pre booty call agreement

Pre-Booty Call Agreement

This Pre-Booty Call Agreement (hereinafter referred to as "The Agreement") is entered into on this ___day of ______________, 20 __, by____________________, (hereinafter referred to as the "Participant") between ____________________, (hereinafter referred to as the "Holder of 'The Agreement'") and ____________________ (Participant).
This Agreement shall cover the following rules and principles for the Participant:

1. No sleeping over!! Unless it is very good and we need to repeat it in the morning.
2. No meeting in public except for dinner or drinks before the events of the evening.
3. No calls before 9 pm. We don't have anything to talk about.
4. None of that "lovemaking" stuff, only mind-blowing sex allowed.
5. No emotional discussions!! i.e. Where are we heading with this? Do you love me? The answer is "no", so don't even ask.
6. No plans made in advance. That is why you are called "the backup." Unless you are from out-of-town, then it's only a one-time advanced arrangement.
7. All gifts accepted- money is always good.
8. No baby talk- however, dirty talk is encouraged.
9. No asking for comparisons with former lovers... it's really none of your damn business.
10. No calling each other friends with privileges. We are not friends, just sex buddies.
11. Calling out the wrong name during sex is OK. Don't be offended, you mean no less to me than you did before.
12. No extra clothing!! I don't want your ass leaving anything behind when you leave.
13. No falling asleep right after sex!! It's over so get your ass up and go home.
14. Don't be offended if I don't ask if you enjoyed it. I don't care!!
15. You cannot borrow my car for any reason.
16. If anyone of the opposite sex asks who you are, the standard response will be "My roommates girlfriend/boyfriend."
17. Doggie style preferred. Just hit it hard and right or get the Hell out! (Reason: The less eye contact the better. I don't want to look at you.)
18. We are to hook up absolutely whenever the mood strikes me, so stop calling!
19. Bring your own drink-I am not your liquor store.
20. No phone use, please! I don't want anyone calling back looking for your ass.

*Extra tip for successful booty calls: Only the holder of the Agreement may alter the aforementioned rules. If the other party attempts to change or alter any terms of the Agreement, it will automatically become null and void. The Participant will then be removed from the "Possible Future Relationship List" and given minimal Booty Call privileges, and cut off from any communications unless first initiated by the holder of this Agreement. If further violations of the Agreement occur the Participant will be deleted from phone memory, email list, and blocked from all communications until the Participant's silly ass understands the rules.

Participant:
Holder of the "Agreement":
Signature: ____________________
Date:_________________________
Signature: ____________________
Date: _________________________
beteez2 is offline  
Old 10-22-2004, 02:38 PM   #2 (permalink)
It wasnt me
 
tekaweni's Avatar
 
Location: Scotland
where do i sign?
__________________
If you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always gotten
tekaweni is offline  
Old 10-23-2004, 08:57 AM   #3 (permalink)
"Without the fuzz"
 
KinkyKiwi's Avatar
 
Location: ..too close for comfort..
lol this makes me soo glad i dont need to be a booty call...
__________________
Some mornings, it's just not worth chewing through the leather straps.
Play with each other. Play with yourselves. Just don't play with the squirrels, they bite.
KinkyKiwi is offline  
Old 10-24-2004, 01:53 AM   #4 (permalink)
Upright
 
Am I the only one who printed this?
Thoraby is offline  
Old 10-24-2004, 02:21 AM   #5 (permalink)
Upright
 
ownage.

copy + paste ftw
lowla is offline  
 

Tags
agreement, booty, call, pre


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On



All times are GMT -8. The time now is 09:04 PM.

Tilted Forum Project

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0 PL2
© 2002-2012 Tilted Forum Project

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140 141 142 143 144 145 146 147 148 149 150 151 152 153 154 155 156 157 158 159 160 161 162 163 164 165 166 167 168 169 170 171 172 173 174 175 176 177 178 179 180 181 182 183 184 185 186 187 188 189 190 191 192 193 194 195 196 197 198 199 200 201 202 203 204 205 206 207 208 209 210 211 212 213 214 215 216 217 218 219 220 221 222 223 224 225 226 227 228 229 230 231 232 233 234 235 236 237 238 239 240 241 242 243 244 245 246 247 248 249 250 251 252 253 254 255 256 257 258 259 260 261 262 263 264 265 266 267 268 269 270 271 272 273 274 275 276 277 278 279 280 281 282 283 284 285 286 287 288 289 290 291 292 293 294 295 296 297 298 299 300 301 302 303 304 305 306 307 308 309 310 311 312 313 314 315 316 317 318 319 320 321 322 323 324 325 326 327 328 329 330 331 332 333 334 335 336 337 338 339 340 341 342 343 344 345 346 347 348 349 350 351 352 353 354 355 356 357 358 359 360