Jack Handey Quote of the Day 10-06-04 - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

yster · 10-07-2004, 01:02 PM

Coming up on the end of "Fuzzy Memories", just a few days worth left.

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The way I see it, kids need exercise more than they need ice cream. So when I worked as an ice cream man, driving an ice cream truck, I would try to drive fast enough that the kid couldn't catch me, but not so fast that he'd give up right away. Some kids will chase you for eight or nine blocks.

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I think the biggest mistake I ever made in my life was not eating all of that guy's pie instead of just half of it, because he was in the restroom for at least another two or three minutes.

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There used to be this bully who would demand my lunch money every day. Since I was smaller, I would give it to him. But then I decided to fight back. I started taking karate lessons. But then the karate lesson guy said I had to pay him five dollars a lesson. So I just went back to paying the bully. Before I paid him, though, I would go into my karate stance, because that's all I learned before I got kicked out.

MexicanOnABike · 10-10-2004, 11:40 AM

the third is fuicking great!

ancientk · 10-10-2004, 01:32 PM

Who is Jack Handey? I'm only familiar with his SNL moments.

10-07-2004, 01:02 PM	#1 (permalink)
yster Tilted	Jack Handey Quote of the Day 10-06-04 Coming up on the end of "Fuzzy Memories", just a few days worth left. --- The way I see it, kids need exercise more than they need ice cream. So when I worked as an ice cream man, driving an ice cream truck, I would try to drive fast enough that the kid couldn't catch me, but not so fast that he'd give up right away. Some kids will chase you for eight or nine blocks. --- I think the biggest mistake I ever made in my life was not eating all of that guy's pie instead of just half of it, because he was in the restroom for at least another two or three minutes. --- There used to be this bully who would demand my lunch money every day. Since I was smaller, I would give it to him. But then I decided to fight back. I started taking karate lessons. But then the karate lesson guy said I had to pay him five dollars a lesson. So I just went back to paying the bully. Before I paid him, though, I would go into my karate stance, because that's all I learned before I got kicked out.

10-10-2004, 11:40 AM	#2 (permalink)
MexicanOnABike Location: up north	the third is fuicking great! __________________ - Movie Reviews - Ratings-

10-10-2004, 01:32 PM	#3 (permalink)
ancientk Upright	Who is Jack Handey? I'm only familiar with his SNL moments.