Jack Handey Quote of the Day 9-21-04
 

Still more from "Fuzzy Memories"

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One day Dad asked me to go fishing with him. I got scared. I had the feeling he was going to try to drown me. I don't know why I thought that, because so far he had never tried to kill me. But he had never taken me fishing either, so I was suspicious.
When we got to the lake, he walked right up to it. "Hey, son, come here," he said. "Look at these minnows."
"Nice try, Dad--if that's your real name!" I yelled. Then I ran back to the car and locked myself in.
Dad never took me fishing again. So I think that proves my case.

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Mom used to warn me that I could lose an eye playing with BB guns. But she never warned me that I could also lose my BB gun, which I did.

These quotes always make me smile for some reason.