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Old 03-03-2004, 05:20 PM   #1 (permalink)
Psycho
 
There once was a man from Nantucket...

I've heard the beginning to this one a thousand times...anybody know the rest of it?

I tried looking up on Yahoo, but I couldn't find anything...
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.:Panopticon:.
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Old 03-03-2004, 05:23 PM   #2 (permalink)
Comment or else!!
 
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Location: Home sweet home
*Kelly stares at Panopticon's avatar* (mind go blank)
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Old 03-03-2004, 07:16 PM   #3 (permalink)
Go faster!
 
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Location: Wisconsin
There once was a man from Nantucket
Whose dick was so long he could suck it
He said with a grin
As he wiped off his chin
If my ear were a cunt, I would fuck it.
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Old 03-03-2004, 07:25 PM   #4 (permalink)
Upright
 
have a kid from middle school saying that on tape, heh
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Old 03-03-2004, 07:47 PM   #5 (permalink)
pow!
 
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Location: NorCal
Also...

There once was a Greek from Nantucket
Whose dick was so long he could suck it
He looked in the glass
got a peek at his ass
and broke his neck trying to fuck it.
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Old 03-03-2004, 10:05 PM   #6 (permalink)
Junkie
 
Location: 1 mile from Ground Zero
Quote:
Originally posted by clavus
Also...

There once was a Greek from Nantucket
Whose dick was so long he could suck it
He looked in the glass
got a peek at his ass
and broke his neck trying to fuck it.
I've heard lots of limericks before but this is a new one on me!!

Glad
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Old 03-04-2004, 12:02 AM   #7 (permalink)
Tilted
 
they're pretty humorous
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Old 03-04-2004, 09:40 AM   #8 (permalink)
lascivious
 
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*snaps back to consciousness an hour later*

fuck man, that avatar should come with a warning.
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Old 03-19-2004, 04:03 AM   #9 (permalink)
Insane
 
These limericks are gross but funny.
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Old 08-13-2004, 10:29 AM   #10 (permalink)
Loser
 
Location: Scenic Drive
Well, I gotta get in on this...love limericks!

Not gross, but kinda cute:

"There was a young lady called Jo
Liked sex on a sleigh in the snow
The colder - the better
Twould make her much wetter
And her nipples would stand up and glow"

thanks to "Limerick portraits"
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Old 08-13-2004, 12:14 PM   #11 (permalink)
Addict
 
Location: Sarasota
There once was a man from Kent
Whose tool was exceedingly bent
It caused him no trouble
He stuck it in double
And instead of coming he went

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Old 08-13-2004, 04:09 PM   #12 (permalink)
Loser
 
Location: Scenic Drive
There was a young fella named Joe
Who thought he would visit a ho
When he asked "how much?"
She said we'll go dutch
But you better have mo than fo.
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Old 08-13-2004, 10:03 PM   #13 (permalink)
Banned
 
Location: On a couch before a screen
Quote:
Originally posted by ritzboi
have a kid from middle school saying that on tape, heh
Haha, where can I get it?
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Old 08-14-2004, 06:07 AM   #14 (permalink)
We're having potato pancakes!
 
hotzot's Avatar
 
Location: stalag 13
there once was a guy named Dave
who kept a dead whore in a cave
She smelt like shit,
and was missing a tit
But think of the money he saved!
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Old 08-14-2004, 10:41 AM   #15 (permalink)
Loser
 
Location: Scenic Drive
There once was a guy named hotzot
Who said as he sat on a cold pot
If my balls hit the drink
My pecker will shrink
And I can't afford less than I got.

::::::::::::

No offense hotzot, that'n just came to me outta the blue...
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Old 08-14-2004, 02:17 PM   #16 (permalink)
Upright
 
Location: North of 49
There was a young lady from Wheeling
Who was quite low in sexual feeling
When a young prince named Norris
Came and touched her clitoris
She had to be scraped off the ceiling
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Old 08-14-2004, 03:14 PM   #17 (permalink)
Loser
 
Location: Scenic Drive
There was a young man named Beagle
Whose age was less than legal
When buying a beer
He always did fear
That he should have ordered it from Spiegel...
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Old 08-16-2004, 11:33 AM   #18 (permalink)
Addict
 
Location: under a rock
There once was a man from Nantucket,
Who promised his dog he would fuck it.
But the dog, just in time,
Said, "If you don't mind,
I'd rather a Chicken McNugget."
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Old 08-16-2004, 11:38 PM   #19 (permalink)
Non-Rookie
 
NoSoup's Avatar
 
Location: Green Bay, WI
There once was a man in Bell-Air
Who was fucking his wife on the stair
The Banister broke
In the midst of his stroke
and he finished off in midair
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Just in case you were wondering...
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Old 08-17-2004, 06:21 AM   #20 (permalink)
We can't stop here! This is bat country!
 
chewybaca96's Avatar
 
Location: SL,UT
Old mother Hubbard

Old mother Hubbard
Went to her cupboard
to get her poor dog a bone
but when she bent over
Ol' Rover came over
and gave her a bone of his own
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Old 08-19-2004, 07:43 PM   #21 (permalink)
Banned
 
There was a young girl named Alice
Who used dynamite as a phallus
They found her vagina
In North Carolina
And part of her anus in Dallas.
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Old 08-20-2004, 02:23 AM   #22 (permalink)
Tilted
 
Location: Dublin, Ireland
The once was man from Sheen
who invented a wanking machine
on the 21st stroke
the fucking thing broke
and whipped his bollocks to cream
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Old 08-20-2004, 03:49 AM   #23 (permalink)
Banned
 
Location: On a couch before a screen
Hahahah nice one Ripp3r
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Old 08-22-2004, 10:42 AM   #24 (permalink)
Happy as a hippo
 
StormBerlin's Avatar
 
Location: Southern California
lol, nice....
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Old 08-22-2004, 04:26 PM   #25 (permalink)
Loser
 
Location: Scenic Drive
There was a young man named Ripp3r
Who thought as he sped away in his car
My bullocks are cream
But I just can't dream
What I'm going to tell my doctar...


reaching...
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Old 08-24-2004, 02:43 PM   #26 (permalink)
Banned
 
Location: Massachusetts, USA
This is not mine:

The babe, with a cry brief and dismal,
fell into the water baptismal.
Ere they'd gather'd its plight,
It had sunk out of sight,
For the depth of the font was abysmal.

Same source:

The partition of Vavasour Scowles
Was a sickener. They came on his bowels
in a firkin. His brain
was found clogging a drain.
And his toes were inside of some towels.

But wait, there's MORE!!! Good thing I'm not home where the source is.
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Old 08-25-2004, 03:40 PM   #27 (permalink)
Psycho
 
cheese's Avatar
 
Location: In your bath tub with all your other rubber toys
there once was a man from peru
who took a trip in his canoe
feel asleep dreaming of venus
grabbed ahold of his penis
and woke up with a handfull of goo
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Old 09-01-2004, 12:55 PM   #28 (permalink)
Upright
 
There Once was a nice man named sweeny ,
Who's wife was a terrible meanie.
the latch on her snatch ,had a terrible catch
and she could only be fucked by houdini!!
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Old 09-01-2004, 05:21 PM   #29 (permalink)
Tilted
 
Man from Sparta - sorry for the bad spelling

There once was a man from Sparta
Who was a phenomoinal farta
he could fart anything
from god save the king
to beatoveen's moonlight sonata

one time he was dared to perfrom
the william tell overture storm
noone could dishearten
that fart-happy spartan
'cuz his fart was in perfect form

Though some thought he couldn't do it
they didn't worry him a bit
with his legs spread apart
he proceeded to fart
and collapsed in a shower of shit


thats by far my favorite lymrick
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Old 09-01-2004, 07:23 PM   #30 (permalink)
Junkie
 
SirLance's Avatar
 
Location: In the middle of the desert.
Quote:
Originally Posted by DDDDave
There once was a man from Kent
Whose tool was exceedingly bent
It caused him no trouble
He stuck it in double
And instead of coming he went

I'm sharing this with my girlfriend...

All are funny! Thanks!
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Old 09-02-2004, 12:52 PM   #31 (permalink)
no one special
 
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Location: Charlotte, NC
traid that was awesome thanks for the laughs all
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Old 09-02-2004, 03:01 PM   #32 (permalink)
Upright
 
There once was a man from Nantucket
who took a pig in a thicket to fuck it
the pig said you queer ,get away from my rear
and come around to the front and I'll suck it
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Old 09-05-2004, 03:42 AM   #33 (permalink)
Crazy
 
Location: SW NEW HAMPSHIRE
there once was a lass from decator, who was had by an old alligator, but nobody knew how she relished that screw, for after he made her he ate her.
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Old 09-05-2004, 08:53 AM   #34 (permalink)
Psycho
 
ElwoodBlues's Avatar
 
Location: Massachusetts
Quote:
Originally Posted by DEI37
There once was a man from Nantucket
Whose dick was so long he could suck it
He said with a grin
As he wiped off his chin
If my ear were a cunt, I would fuck it.
I was at work the other day, and a customer came in with a t-shirt that said

"There once was a man from Nantucket" on the front. As he walked away I saw the back of his shirt said

"I AM the man from Nantucket. Immediately I thought of this thread.
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