Variation on an earlier lawyer joke - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

redlotuss9 · 02-11-2004, 08:21 AM

An engineer spent his time on earth in a good and honest way when he died unexpectedly. Standing at the Pearly Gates, St. Peter looked up his name in the entry-to-heaven book and didn't see his name in there.

"How can this be?" the engineer said. "I lived a good, honest life! I should be in heaven!"

"Sorry," St. Peter replied. "If your name's not in the book, you can't get into heaven."

So the engineer got sent to Hell. When he got down there, he noticed the shabby condition of the place. He proceeded to go into the devil's office to have a talk with him. After a few hours, the engineer emerged from the devil's office with a bunch of blueprints and sketches. After a few weeks, the engineer was able to install elevators, escalators, air conditioners, running water and flushing toilets, something the place wasn't used to. The Lord noticed all of these changes from up on high and went to have a talk with the devil.

"I hate to tell you this," the Lord said to the devil, "but a clerical error was made. That engineer that has been making all the improvements down here was supposed to be in the entry-to-heaven book. I'm afraid I'm going to have to take him away from you and bring him to heaven."

"Forget it!" the devil replied, "You made the mistake, we like what he's done to the place, he's staying!"

"You can't do that!" the Lord said. "I'll sue you!"

The devil looked at him and said, "Where are you going to get a lawyer?"

KirStang · 02-11-2004, 01:04 PM

HAHAHAHAHA

That's really really good.

Gortexfogg · 02-12-2004, 06:40 AM

Hilarious!!

Sensei · 02-12-2004, 10:16 AM

LOL! I've never heard that one before, it's grrrrrrreat.

xim · 02-12-2004, 10:38 PM

haha im sending that to my dad

datroyenschwart · 02-14-2004, 01:21 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by xim
haha im sending that to my dad

That's amazing. That's exactly what I was going to say. My dad's better!

Ilow · 02-14-2004, 07:36 PM

that's awesome, thanks

datroyenschwart · 02-14-2004, 10:01 PM

What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish?

One's a scum-sucking bottom dweller... and the other's a fish.

fizzledorf · 02-16-2004, 04:37 AM

good monday morning laugh!

Crack · 02-18-2004, 01:10 PM

It's funny, with all the lawyer jokes about them being Scum-sucking-filth, there are certinly a lot of high rated shows on television about lawyers... it must be a love-hate relationship...

02-11-2004, 08:21 AM	#1 (permalink)
redlotuss9 Tilted Location: Pennsylvania	Variation on an earlier lawyer joke An engineer spent his time on earth in a good and honest way when he died unexpectedly. Standing at the Pearly Gates, St. Peter looked up his name in the entry-to-heaven book and didn't see his name in there. "How can this be?" the engineer said. "I lived a good, honest life! I should be in heaven!" "Sorry," St. Peter replied. "If your name's not in the book, you can't get into heaven." So the engineer got sent to Hell. When he got down there, he noticed the shabby condition of the place. He proceeded to go into the devil's office to have a talk with him. After a few hours, the engineer emerged from the devil's office with a bunch of blueprints and sketches. After a few weeks, the engineer was able to install elevators, escalators, air conditioners, running water and flushing toilets, something the place wasn't used to. The Lord noticed all of these changes from up on high and went to have a talk with the devil. "I hate to tell you this," the Lord said to the devil, "but a clerical error was made. That engineer that has been making all the improvements down here was supposed to be in the entry-to-heaven book. I'm afraid I'm going to have to take him away from you and bring him to heaven." "Forget it!" the devil replied, "You made the mistake, we like what he's done to the place, he's staying!" "You can't do that!" the Lord said. "I'll sue you!" The devil looked at him and said, "Where are you going to get a lawyer?"

02-12-2004, 10:16 AM	#4 (permalink)
Sensei Black Belt in Slacking Off Location: Portland Or-ah-gun	LOL! I've never heard that one before, it's grrrrrrreat. __________________ Slacking off with style since 1981.

02-12-2004, 10:38 PM	#5 (permalink)
xim Insane Location: One with the Universe	haha im sending that to my dad __________________ If I could be anyone in the world I would be Britney Spears. Shes in so many commercials about pepsi... www.ximcity.com

02-14-2004, 07:36 PM	#7 (permalink)
Ilow Junkie Location: Pats country	that's awesome, thanks __________________ "Religion is the one area of our discourse in which it is considered noble to pretend to be certain about things no human being could possibly be certain about" --Sam Harris

02-14-2004, 10:01 PM	#8 (permalink)
datroyenschwart Tilted Location: North Carolina (college)	What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One's a scum-sucking bottom dweller... and the other's a fish. __________________ Every day that I am alive is a great day. Life is filled with potential and love is everywhere.

02-12-2004, 06:40 AM	#3 (permalink)
Gortexfogg I and I Location: Stillwater, OK	Hilarious!!

02-16-2004, 04:37 AM	#9 (permalink)
fizzledorf Insane	good monday morning laugh!

02-18-2004, 01:10 PM	#10 (permalink)
Crack Misanthropic Location: Ohio! yay!	It's funny, with all the lawyer jokes about them being Scum-sucking-filth, there are certinly a lot of high rated shows on television about lawyers... it must be a love-hate relationship... __________________ Crack, you and I are long overdue for a vicious bout of mansex. ~Halx