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-   -   Pirate Joke (https://thetfp.com/tfp/tilted-humor/40644-pirate-joke.html)

grassygnoll 01-05-2004 07:23 PM

Pirate Joke
 
A Pirate walks into a bar.
He has a steering wheel on his crotch.
He says to the barkeep, "Give me a beer"
The bartender can't help himself and says, "Do you know you have a steering wheel on your crotch?"
The pirate replies "ARRRGGG!! Its driving me nuts!"

I find the secret to telling that one is just enough enthusiasm on the ARRRGGG!

ßeastie 01-06-2004 03:51 AM

Now that is a good one!

nukeu666 01-06-2004 05:03 AM

eh?

MexicanOnABike 01-06-2004 12:44 PM

ahhhhhhhhh! do a search next time... its been told like 5 times!

grassygnoll 01-06-2004 08:55 PM

Yep... I would be nice to have that feature...

I know. I know. I've read the post

http://www.tfproject.org/tfp/showthr...threadid=39765

perhaps more people should....

All in good humor mexicanonabike. :)

~springrain 01-07-2004 06:21 AM

*snicker*... funny... :)

Peetster 01-07-2004 06:24 AM

I like it. :-)

txstrosman 01-07-2004 01:09 PM

most excellent!!!!!! damn funny!!!!

Yalaynia 01-08-2004 07:15 PM

Thats a cute one.

Sfizzio 01-09-2004 03:56 PM

Nice...yeah, I would assume the right method of delivery could make it hella funny

Junchbailey 01-09-2004 09:07 PM

Nothing beats a good pirate joke.

Stare At The Sun 01-10-2004 12:36 AM

Now that is a good joke!

batm4n_23 01-11-2004 11:03 AM

i like pirate jokes (especially if they have an AAARRRRGGHH in them)

Crack 01-14-2004 08:05 PM

Did anybody see the new Pirate Movie, I wasen't allowed to, cause it was rated AAARRRRGGHH!
~Crack

Man/Amazing 01-14-2004 09:57 PM

Awww it pretty funny

yakimushi 01-15-2004 08:44 AM

I told this one during the Resident Advisor selection process to the directors of the program... It wasn't well met by the suits but the applicants loved it!

Raptor20561 01-20-2004 08:51 PM

LOL funneh, yes, but im shure a joke with NINJAS would be even funnier! hahaha

mr_mcrafe 01-21-2004 02:11 AM

Nah pirates have the upper hand over ninjas. I'm sure this could be great said the right way.

Mavric98 01-21-2004 02:21 AM

That joke is great.

wipeout 01-22-2004 07:34 PM

funny stuff there

kulrblind 01-23-2004 05:46 AM

Alternate pirate joke:

Guy walks into a bar.. orders a beer, and sits at the bar to drink it. Looks across the room and notices a pirate, who's head is extremely small for his body size, about the size of a human fist. Guy asks the bartender,

"Hey, Mac... any idea what that guy's story is?"

Bartender replies, "He comes here a lot, but he doesn't talk much...why don't you go find out?"

Guy goes over with two beers, offering one to the pirate, and says, "Hey, pal... what's your story?"

Pirate says,
"Well, I was shipwrecked and marooned on an island for 2 years. In that time, I found me a mermaid, who granted me two wishes. The first was that I could get back to shore, and the second wish was that she'd have sex with me. She said, "Aww, come now.. you know i'm not built for sex",

So I said, "How about a little head?"

Eviltree 01-23-2004 08:53 PM

Nothing beats pirate jokes

A little boy dresses up as a pirate for halloween. He has a bit of a speech impediment. The first house he goes to he says, "I'm a birate. This is my barrot. Can I have some bandy?" The woman looks at him and says, "My my aren't you cute. But where are your buccaneers?" The boy looks are her angrily and says "On the side of my buckin head you buckin dumass."


(Pirate in a bar jokes are even better)
A pirate walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Hey, I haven't seen you in a while. What happened, you look terrible!"
"What do you mean?" the pirate replies, "I'm fine."
The bartender says, "But what about that wooden leg? You didn't have that before."
"Well," says the pirate, "We were in a battle at sea and a cannon ball hit my leg but the surgeon fixed me up, and I'm fine, really."
"Yeah," says the bartender, "But what about that hook? Last time I saw you, you had both hands."
"Well," says the pirate, "We were in another battle and we boarded the enemy ship. I was in a sword fight and my hand was cut off but the surgeon fixed me up with this hook, and I feel great, really."
"Oh," says the bartender, "What about that eye patch? Last time you were in here you had both eyes."
"Well," says the pirate, "One day when we were at sea, some birds were flying over the ship. I looked up, and one of them shat in my eye."
"So?" replied the bartender, "what happened? You couldn't have lost an eye just from some bird shit!"
"Well," says the pirate, "I really wasn't used to the hook yet."

NoseyJoe 01-24-2004 08:46 PM

Why are pirates so mean?!?
THEY JUST ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH

Dixie_Wrekked 01-25-2004 05:58 PM

perfect for dunken parties


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