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-   -   Facelift (https://thetfp.com/tfp/tilted-humor/40528-facelift.html)

Reese 01-04-2004 03:16 PM

Facelift
 
A woman decides to have a facelift for her birthday. She spends $5,000 and feels pretty good about the results. On her way home she stops at a newsstand to buy a paper. Before leaving, she asks the sales clerk, "I hope you don't mind my asking, but how old do you think I am?"

"About 32", the clerk replies.

"I'm actually 47," the woman says happily.

A little while later, she goes into McDonald's, and upon getting her order, asks the counter girl the same question. She replies, "I'd quess about 29."

The woman replies, "Nope, I am 47." Now she is feeling really good about herself.

While waiting for the bus home, she asks an old man the same question. He replies, "I'm 78 and my eyesight is starting to go. Although, when I was young, there was a sure way to tell how old a woman was, but it requires you to let me put my hands up your shirt and feel your boobs. Then I can tell exactly how old you are."

They waited in silence on the empty street until curiosity got the best of the woman, and she finally said, "What the hell, go ahead."

The old man slips both hands up her shirt, under her bra, and begins to feel around. After a couple of minutes, she says, "Okay, okay, how old am I?"

He removes his hands and says, "You are 47."

Stunned, the woman says, "That is amazing! How did you know?"

The old man replies, "I was behind you in line at McDonald's."

DEI37 01-04-2004 04:14 PM

Now that's creative. I'll have to try that sometime!

KellyC 01-04-2004 10:49 PM

HAHAHAHAHAHA!! thats so clever!!

Kllr Wolf 01-05-2004 12:29 AM

I love that. of course it might be my only way to get to feel a gir up .

kajagoogoo 01-05-2004 07:39 AM

gotta remember that for when i am 78!

Brewmaniac 01-05-2004 08:21 AM

Great! Thanks

MexicanOnABike 01-05-2004 01:46 PM

cooool

Shpoop 01-05-2004 03:33 PM

thats awesome

deportes 02-15-2004 05:49 PM

good

Slacks_01 02-16-2004 12:18 AM

ha that was good, that perverted old man

mordret 02-16-2004 04:10 AM

I love this one !!!

Gortexfogg 02-16-2004 06:18 AM

Oh man, funny stuff!

kulrblind 02-16-2004 10:33 AM

Hahaha... love that joke. Love hearing again, too!

FoolThemAll 02-16-2004 11:14 AM

I like, I like.

red_zinfandel8 02-16-2004 01:41 PM

That's priceless

theemaan 02-18-2004 09:17 AM

Thanks for the idea

Ilow 02-18-2004 10:05 AM

ha ha, that's funny as shit!

thedrake 02-18-2004 10:17 AM

funny


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