Talking Dog Take Two - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

ratbastid · 10-08-2003, 04:49 AM

A guy's driving on a dusty old back road, when he sees a sign by on the shoulder, "Talking Dog for Sale".

So he pulls off, and goes up to the house that's there, to a man sitting on the porch.

"Sign says you have a talking dog?"

Man says, "Yep. He's around back. Go see for yourself."

So the guy goes around back, and finds a normal looking black lab sitting there. He says,"Um. You talk?"

"Sure," says the dog.

"Wow!" says the guy, "How'd that happen?"

The dog says, "Well, I realized I had this talent as a very young pup. Naturally I went to the government about it, and the CIA picked me up. Man, they flew me all around the world spying for them. You wouldn't believe the kinds of things people will talk about in front of a dog. I was decorated as a hero, given the national medal of honor, all that stuff.

"But eventually I got tired of flying around the world, so I quit the CIA and I got a job with security at my local airport. I stopped all sorts of smuggling operations and drug deals. And again, I was a hero, given awards and ceremonies and plaques, all sorts of things.

"But that got old too, so I quit that job, found myself a nice bitch, raised a few puppies, and now I'm, retired."

"Wow," says the guy. "Well, I'll see you later."

"Ok," says the dog.

The guy walks back around to the front of the house and asks the man, "How much you say you want for that dog?"

"Ten bucks," says the man.

"Ten bucks!?" the guys says, "For such an amazing dog, you only want ten bucks??"

"Oh," the guy says, shaking his head, "That dog's such a god damned liar. He didn't do all that shit!"

legolas · 10-08-2003, 12:41 PM

haha not bad

Tarn · 10-08-2003, 01:01 PM

LOL

/me looks at his dog

prince_albert · 10-08-2003, 01:20 PM

Now I got fooled by a dog....

Esoteric · 10-08-2003, 07:27 PM

Haha, good one.

Midlandmadman · 10-09-2003, 08:37 AM

I am not quite sure why but this one cracked me up.

10-08-2003, 04:49 AM	#1 (permalink)
ratbastid Darth Papa Location: Yonder	Talking Dog Take Two A guy's driving on a dusty old back road, when he sees a sign by on the shoulder, "Talking Dog for Sale". So he pulls off, and goes up to the house that's there, to a man sitting on the porch. "Sign says you have a talking dog?" Man says, "Yep. He's around back. Go see for yourself." So the guy goes around back, and finds a normal looking black lab sitting there. He says,"Um. You talk?" "Sure," says the dog. "Wow!" says the guy, "How'd that happen?" The dog says, "Well, I realized I had this talent as a very young pup. Naturally I went to the government about it, and the CIA picked me up. Man, they flew me all around the world spying for them. You wouldn't believe the kinds of things people will talk about in front of a dog. I was decorated as a hero, given the national medal of honor, all that stuff. "But eventually I got tired of flying around the world, so I quit the CIA and I got a job with security at my local airport. I stopped all sorts of smuggling operations and drug deals. And again, I was a hero, given awards and ceremonies and plaques, all sorts of things. "But that got old too, so I quit that job, found myself a nice bitch, raised a few puppies, and now I'm, retired." "Wow," says the guy. "Well, I'll see you later." "Ok," says the dog. The guy walks back around to the front of the house and asks the man, "How much you say you want for that dog?" "Ten bucks," says the man. "Ten bucks!?" the guys says, "For such an amazing dog, you only want ten bucks??" "Oh," the guy says, shaking his head, "That dog's such a god damned liar. He didn't do all that shit!" Last edited by ratbastid; 10-08-2003 at 04:53 AM..

10-08-2003, 12:41 PM	#2 (permalink)
legolas shit faced cockmaster Location: CT	haha not bad __________________ "To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems."

10-08-2003, 07:27 PM	#5 (permalink)
Esoteric Tired Location: Florida	Haha, good one. __________________ From a head full of pressure rests the senses that I clutch Made a date with Divinity, but she wouldn't let me fuck I got touched by a hazy shaded, God help me change Caught a rush on the floor from the life in my veins

10-09-2003, 08:37 AM	#6 (permalink)
Midlandmadman Redwing fan extraordinaire Location: Michigan	I am not quite sure why but this one cracked me up. __________________ Its good to be back.

10-08-2003, 01:01 PM	#3 (permalink)
Tarn Crazy	LOL /me looks at his dog

10-08-2003, 01:20 PM	#4 (permalink)
prince_albert Banned Location: Bradford, UK	Now I got fooled by a dog....