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09-02-2003, 06:23 PM
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#1 (permalink) |
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Upright
Location: Da South
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Contest: Beer vs Pussy
Contest: Beer vs. pussy
A beer is always wet. A pussy needs encouragement. Advantage: Beer. A beer tastes horrible served hot. A pussy tastes better served hot. Advantage: pussy. Having an ice cold beer makes you satisfied. Having an ice cold pussy makes you married. Advantage: Beer. Beers have commercials making fun of skunky ones. pussy does not. Advantage: Draw. If you get a hair in your teeth consuming pussy, you are not disgusted. Advantage: pussy 24 beers come in a box. A pussy is a box you can come in. Advantage: pussy. Too much head makes you mad at the person giving you a beer. Advantage: pussy. If a beer is brewed with yeast, it is still edible. Advantage: Beer. If you come home smelling like beer, The Woman may get mad. If you come home smelling like pussy - you're dead. Advantage: Beer. 6 beers in a night and you better not drive. 6 humps in a night and you have done all the driving you need. Advantage: pussy Too much beer and you get fat. Too much pussy and it makes you poor. Advantage: Draw It is socially acceptable to have a beer in the stands at a football game. You are a legend if you have a pussy in the stands at a football game. Advantage: pussy If a cop smells beer on your breath, you are going to get a breathalyzer. If a cop smells pussy on your breath, you are going to get a high five! Advantage: pussy With beer, bigger is better. Advantage: beer. If you think all day about the next pussy you will have, you are normal. If you think all day about your next beer, you are an alcoholic. Advantage: pussy Peeling labels off of beers is fun. Peeling panties off of pussy is more fun. Advantage: pussy If you suddenly drop a beer, it may break. If you suddenly drop a pussy, it may hunt you down like the dog you are. Advantage: Beer. If you change to another beer, your old brand will gladly have you back. Advantage: beer. The best pussy you have ever had is not gone once you have enjoyed it. Advantage: pussy. The worst pussy you have ever had is not gone once you have enjoyed it. Advantage: Beer. Bad beer: Schlitz, Pabst Blue Ribbon, Old Swill. Bad pussy: Roseanne, Janet Reno, Madeline Albright, Dana Doran Advantage: Draw Good beer: Guinness, Sam Adams, New Castle. Good wussy: Almost all but the above. Advantage: pussy. The government taxes beer. Advantage: pussy. It's a close call, but the numbers never lie. Advantage: pussy.
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We have enough "youth", how about a fountain of "smart" |
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09-03-2003, 07:59 AM
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#9 (permalink) | |
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Psycho
Location: cali
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funny list.
Quote:
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no man or woman is worth your tears - and the one who is, won't make you cry question authority, don't ask why, just do it! |
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09-06-2003, 06:13 PM
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#17 (permalink) |
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Crazy
Location: Iowa?
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One of the best parts was left out... One usually leads to the other.
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I should have been a pair of ragged claws Scuttling across the floors of silent seas. -The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock, T.S. Eliot Your dumber then me. |
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| Tags |
| beer, contest, pussy |
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thats great stuff
