Contest: Beer vs Pussy
 

Contest: Beer vs. pussy

A beer is always wet.

A pussy needs encouragement.

Advantage: Beer.

A beer tastes horrible served hot.

A pussy tastes better served hot.

Advantage: pussy.

Having an ice cold beer makes you satisfied.

Having an ice cold pussy makes you married.

Advantage: Beer.

Beers have commercials making fun of skunky ones.

pussy does not.

Advantage: Draw.

If you get a hair in your teeth consuming pussy, you are not disgusted.

Advantage: pussy

24 beers come in a box.

A pussy is a box you can come in.

Advantage: pussy.

Too much head makes you mad at the person giving you a beer.

Advantage: pussy.

If a beer is brewed with yeast, it is still edible.

Advantage: Beer.

If you come home smelling like beer, The Woman may get mad.

If you come home smelling like pussy - you're dead.

Advantage: Beer.

6 beers in a night and you better not drive.

6 humps in a night and you have done all the driving you need.

Advantage: pussy

Too much beer and you get fat.

Too much pussy and it makes you poor.

Advantage: Draw

It is socially acceptable to have a beer in the stands at a football game.

You are a legend if you have a pussy in the stands at a football game.

Advantage: pussy

If a cop smells beer on your breath, you are going to get a breathalyzer.

If a cop smells pussy on your breath, you are going to get a high five!

Advantage: pussy

With beer, bigger is better.

Advantage: beer.

If you think all day about the next pussy you will have, you are normal.

If you think all day about your next beer, you are an alcoholic.

Advantage: pussy

Peeling labels off of beers is fun.

Peeling panties off of pussy is more fun.

Advantage: pussy

If you suddenly drop a beer, it may break.

If you suddenly drop a pussy, it may hunt you down like the dog you are.

Advantage: Beer.

If you change to another beer, your old brand will gladly have you back.

Advantage: beer.

The best pussy you have ever had is not gone once you have enjoyed it.

Advantage: pussy.

The worst pussy you have ever had is not gone once you have enjoyed it.

Advantage: Beer.

Bad beer: Schlitz, Pabst Blue Ribbon, Old Swill.

Bad pussy: Roseanne, Janet Reno, Madeline Albright, Dana Doran

Advantage: Draw

Good beer: Guinness, Sam Adams, New Castle.

Good wussy: Almost all but the above.

Advantage: pussy.

The government taxes beer.

Advantage: pussy.

It's a close call, but the numbers never lie.

Advantage: pussy.

RAR!!!! thats the shit

the fact that the contest was so close explains why you can get hooked on both of them

Perhaps you can get hooked on em both, but nothing really beats pussy.

Giving up either makes suicide look a good alternative

hahaha :D thats great stuff

Hahaha, that just made my day :D

Funny stuff! I love that line "If you think all day about your next beer, you are an alcoholic." Hilarious!!

funny list.

i've given up pussy for the meantime, not by my own choice tho, damn ex. and i don't drink. the days are suddenly looking really grim for me.

yep, i definatly agree with the outcome as well :D

lol that was great, i think i'd take pussy over beer any day

haha good stuff!

f- ing hillariuos!

aint that the truth !!!

...hmmm, funny

Pretty funny.

One of the best parts was left out... One usually leads to the other.