uncle phil

You may be a Taliban if:

1. You refine heroin for a living, but you have a moral objection to beer.

2. You own a $3,000 machine gun and $5,000 rocket launcher, but you can't afford shoes.

3. You have more wives than teeth.

4. You wipe your butt with your bare left hand, but consider bacon "unclean."

5. You think vests come in two styles: bullet-proof and suicide.

6. You can't think of anyone you haven't declared Jihad against.

7. You consider television dangerous, but routinely transport explosives in your ass.

8. You were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses other than setting off roadside bombs.

9. You have nothing against women and think every man should own and routinely beat at least two.

10. You've always had a crush on your neighbor's goat.

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

Tully Mars

Ha! My old neighbor has a goat. I must not be a Taliban man, never looked very attractive to me. The neighbor now...

__________________
I used to drink to drown my sorrows, but the damned things have learned how to swim- Frida Kahlo

Vice President Starkizzer Fan Club

streak_56

All of these are good.... we use to own goats, does that mean we should've kept better watch over them?

Strange Famous

edit

actually... that isnt so much fun. Some of that strikes me as pretty racist in my opinion.

__________________
"Do not tell lies, and do not do what you hate,
for all things are plain in the sight of Heaven. For nothing
hidden will not become manifest, and nothing covered will remain
without being uncovered."

The Gospel of Thomas

Deltona Couple

I am curious how you think this is racist? Race has nothing to do with being in the Taliban or not.

__________________
"It is not that I have failed, but that I have found 10,000 ways that it DOESN'T work!" --Thomas Edison

Plan9

This is really amusing... seeing that I spent time all over eastern Afghanistan for a year.

Fuck, those people smell awful.

__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."

Xerxys

Taliban is not a race. They're a militia dedicated to ... jeez, I dunno ...

This was funny!!