03-20-2009, 06:05 PM | #1 (permalink) |
Junkie
Location: Sydney
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One day at the Nursing home.
George and Mildred are elderly residents of a nursing home and every Friday night they would sneak off down the back to a secluded spot where they would take all their clothes off and sit on a bench with Midred holding George's penis in her hand.
They sat for hours reminising about the good old days. This went on for a few weeks until one night Mildred could not find George. Somewhat upset she went back to her room and had a restless night wondering why he did not show up. The next day she went searching for George and an explanation. She finally collared him and asked what had happened. George,rather sheepishly replied "I have been seeing anther Woman". Another Woman exclaimed Mildred? Who is she and what is her name? George replies "Her name is Mary and she is another resident here". Mildred is furious and asks "Whats this Mary got that I haven't got? George looks up at her with a sly grin and says.......... Parkinson's.
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03-20-2009, 09:49 PM | #4 (permalink) |
She's Actual Size
Location: Central Republic of Where-in-the-Hell
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*facepalm*
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"...for though she was ordinary, she possessed health, wit, courage, charm, and cheerfulness. But because she was not beautiful, no one ever seemed to notice these other qualities, which is so often the way of the world." "Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" |
03-21-2009, 02:03 AM | #5 (permalink) |
comfortably numb...
Super Moderator
Location: upstate
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loved it...
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"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done." - Robert S. McNamara ----------------------------------------- "We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches... We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles." - Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message" ----------------------------------------- never wrestle with a pig. you both get dirty; the pig likes it. |
03-24-2009, 09:47 AM | #9 (permalink) |
Master Thief. Master Criminal. Masturbator.
Location: Windiwana
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haha!
why is that so damn funny?
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First they came for the Jews and I did not speak out because I was not a Jew. Then they came for the communists and I did not speak out because I was not a communist. Then they came for the trade unionists and I did not speak out because I was not a trade unionist Then they came for me And there was no one left to speak out for me. -Pastor Martin Niemoller |
Tags |
day, home, nursing |
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