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Old 02-13-2009, 03:29 AM   #1 (permalink)
comfortably numb...
 
uncle phil's Avatar
 
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Location: upstate
Family Court

This 80 year old woman was arrested for shoplifting. When she went before the judge he asked her, "What did you steal?"

She replied, "A can of peaches."

The judge then asked her why she had stolen the can of peaches, and she replied that she was hungry.

The judge then asked her how many peaches were in the can.

She replied, "6."

The judge said, "Then I will give you 6 days in jail."

Before the judge could conclude the trial, the woman's husband spoke up and asked the judge if he could say something.

The judge said, "What is it?"

The husband said, "She also stole a can of peas."
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Old 02-13-2009, 12:10 PM   #2 (permalink)
Junkie
 
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Old 02-13-2009, 02:41 PM   #3 (permalink)
Eat your vegetables
 
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Location: Arabidopsis-ville
Oh man!! hehehe
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Old 02-13-2009, 03:10 PM   #4 (permalink)
Upright
 
Funny... hmm.
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Old 02-13-2009, 04:40 PM   #5 (permalink)
Hi floor! Make me a samwich.
 
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Location: Ontario (in the stray cat complex)
That kinda made me sad =(
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Old 03-05-2009, 07:05 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Location: T.dot
hahahahahahahahaha =( but yeaa...it is kinda sad lol...

kinda reminds me of Everybody Loves Raymond (if guys watch sitcoms) something Frank would say.

lol
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