how many kinds of boobs are there?'
 

A family is seated around the dinner table. The son asks his father, 'Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there?'
The father, answers, 'Well, son, a woman goes through three phases.
In her 20s, a woman's boobs are like melons, round and firm.
In her 30s to 40s, they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit.
After 50, they are like onions'.

'Onions?'
'Yes, you see them and they make you cry.'

His infuriated his wife and daughter; so the daughter asked, 'Mom, how many kinds of Willies are there?'

The mother, smiles and answers, 'Well dear, a man also goes through three phases also.
In his 20s, his Willie is like an oak tree, mighty and hard.
In his 30s and 40s, it is like a birch, flexible but for the most part, reliable.
After his 50s, it is like a Christmas tree'.

'A Christmas tree?'
'Yes --- dead from the root up and the balls are just for decoration.

..

The first time I heard this there was also mention that his willie, like a christmas tree, was only brought out once a year.

Yup, sounds pretty true to me.