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-   -   Penis Replacement (https://thetfp.com/tfp/tilted-humor/111549-penis-replacement.html)

LoganSnake 12-14-2006 07:48 PM

Penis Replacement
 
There was a guy who had been having chronic trouble in trying to get an erection. After weeks of frustration, he finally breaks down and and goes to the doctor. The doctor gives him a thorough examination and finally makes the diagnosis.

"Well, there's good news and there's bad news," she says.

"The bad news is that the muscles around your penis are deteriorating, and there is no cure."

The guy, on the verge of panic, finally regains his composure. "So what's the good news?" he asks.

The doctor says, "There is an experimental treatment available, but there are no guarantees. It involves transplanting the muscles from a baby elephant's trunk into your penis. Would you like to try it?"

The guy thinks about it and finally says, "Well, the thought of going through life without being able to have sex is just too much for me. What have I got to lose? Let's do it." So the doctor performs the operation.

A few weeks later, the guy takes his girlfriend out to a nice restaurant to celebrate his new equipment. While sitting at the table, he feels a stirring between his legs; it gets progressively worse until it reaches the point of being painful.

Seeking relief, he reaches down and unzips his fly to relieve some of the pressure.

Suddenly, his penis leaps free from his pants, slides over the tabletop and grabs a dinner roll, then returns to his pants again.

"Wow!" says his stunned girlfriend, "That was impressive! Can you do that again?"

Eyes watering and face flushed, he says, "Probably... but I don't know if I can fit another dinner roll up my ass!"

Brewmaniac 12-14-2006 08:03 PM

Laughing my ass off for a couple of minutes!
Great joke LoganSnake. Thank You!

Average_Joe 12-15-2006 06:26 AM

I heard Buddy Hackett tell this joke on an HBO special about 10 years ago, and I still laughed when I read it just now. That guy was the $h!t.

Delvid 12-15-2006 10:49 AM

We have a winner. Great joke.

zed wolf 12-15-2006 06:39 PM

That was another bloody brilliant joke!
One of the best Ive herd in a while.

Daniel_ 12-16-2006 12:11 PM

Very funny.

SirLance 12-16-2006 08:15 PM

Oh, God... tears are streaming down my face!

genuinegirly 12-17-2006 11:33 PM

hehe. Goodness that's so rediculous!

Mauser 12-18-2006 07:20 AM

Totally went the opposite way I was thinking it would.

tfpfreak 12-18-2006 10:50 AM

Priceless... Definitely didn't see that coming. Great job.

Mantus 12-18-2006 10:05 PM

That was great

John Falcon 12-19-2006 07:47 AM

Use more butter.

Sharon 12-29-2006 03:42 PM

Hahahaha - I love the jokes with a twist in the tail.

batm4n_23 01-07-2007 07:22 AM

really funny


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