healer

A train hits a bus filled with Catholic school girls and they all perish.

They are in heaven trying to enter the pearly gates when St. Peter asks the first girl,

"Tiffany, have you ever had any contact with a male organ?"
She giggles and shyly replies, "Well, I once touched the head of one with the tip of my finger." St. Peter says, "Okay, dip the tip of your finger in the Holy Water and pass through the gate."

St. Peter asks the next girl the same question, "Jennifer, have you ever had any contact with a male organ?"
The girl is a little reluctant but replies, "Well, once I fondled and stroked one." St. Peter says, "Okay, dip your whole hand in the Holy Water and pass through the gate."

All of a sudden, there is a lot of commotion in the line of girls. One girl is pushing her way to the front of the line. When she reaches the front, St.Peter says, "Lisa! What seems to be the rush?"

The girl replies, "If I'm going to have to gargle that Holy Water, I want to do it before Jessica sticks her bum in it."

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balefire88

Have heard it before, but it is still pretty damn funny.

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"Today is the beginning of the rest of your life."

fresnelly

You had me at Tiffany dipping her finger in. Great stuff!

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Building an artificial intelligence that appreciates Mozart is easy. Building an A.I. that appreciates a theme restaurant is the real challenge - Kit Roebuck - Nine Planets Without Intelligent Life

analog

LMFAO! nice.

genuinegirly

oh goodness.

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"Sometimes I have to remember that things are brought to me for a reason, either for my own lessons or for the benefit of others." Cynthetiq

"violence is no more or less real than non-violence." roachboy

SirLance

A classic!

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