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#1 (permalink) |
Crazy
Location: Arnold, MD
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20 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity.
20 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity.
1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sun glasses on and point Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down. 2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice. 3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They Want Fries with That. 4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It "In." 5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso. 6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For Smuggling Diamonds" 7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy." 8. Don't use any punctuation 9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk. 10. Order a diet water whenever you go out to eat with a serious face. 11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go." 12. Sing Along At The Opera. 13. Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme 14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play tropical Sounds All Day. 15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In The Mood. 16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom. 17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won!, I Won!" 18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling "Run for your lives, they're loose!" 19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner. "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go." 20. Refuse to respond to questions unless you are addressed as "Your Majesty". |
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#2 (permalink) | |
Junkie
Moderator Emeritus
Location: Chicago
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Quote:
__________________
Free your heart from hatred. Free your mind from worries. Live simply. Give more. Expect less.
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#4 (permalink) |
Darth Papa
Location: Yonder
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The worst is when you're leaving work and the answer to a programming problem strikes you just as you get in your car. I always say, "Dammit!", turn around, and go right back in and start coding again.
Another way to maintain a healthy level of insanity: Capitalize Normal Sentences As If They Were Titles Or Other Proper Nouns. |
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#5 (permalink) | |
Junkie
Moderator Emeritus
Location: Chicago
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Quote:
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__________________
Free your heart from hatred. Free your mind from worries. Live simply. Give more. Expect less.
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#6 (permalink) | |
Junkie
Location: In the middle of the desert.
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Quote:
__________________
DEMOCRACY is where your vote counts, FEUDALISM is where your count votes. |
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Tags |
healthy, insanity, level, maintain, ways |
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