Beer vs. Vagina - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

LoganSnake · 02-22-2006, 01:11 PM

1.Beer is always wet. Vagina needs a little work.

One point to BEER

2.Warm beer tastes awful.

One point to VAGINA

3.A really cold beer is satisfying.

One point to BEER

4.If after taking a swig of your favourite beer you find a hair between your teeth, you may vomit.

One point to VAGINA

5. If you get home reeking of beer your wife may get mad, make a scene, kick you out, etc. If you get home reeking of vagina your wife may get mad, kick you out, even leave you. There's definitely a point to be had here, depending on your point of view and personal circumstances.

I'll just call it a DRAW for the time being.

6. Ten beers in one night and you can't drive home. Ten vaginas in one night and you don't want to drive anywhere.

One point to VAGINA

7. If you have a lot of beer in a public place, your reputation may suffer. If you eat any vagina in public, you become a legend.

One point to VAGINA

8. If a cop stops you and you smell of beer you may get arrested. If you smell of vagina he may buy you a beer.

One point to VAGINA

9. You normally don't find old beer.

One point to BEER

10. Too much beer and you'll think you see flying saucers. Too much vagina and you'll think you've seen God.

One point to VAGINA

11. Ripping off a beer bottle label is boring. Ripping off panties is fun.

One point to VAGINA

12. In most countries there's a tax on beer.

One point to VAGINA

13. If you have another beer the first one never gets pissed off.

One point to BEER

14. You can always be sure if you're the first one to open a bottle or a can.

One point to BEER

15. If you shake beer it'll get all agitated but eventually it settles down.

One point to BEER

16. With beer you always have choice: clear, dark, pilsner, ale, lager, etc.

One point to BEER

17. You always know how much beer is going to cost.

One point to BEER

18. Beer doesn't have a mother

One point to BEER

19. Beer never expects to be hugged for half an hour after you drink it.

One point to BEER

FINAL SCORE: BEER: 10 VAGINA: 8

That's it! The matter is settled, the clear winner is: BEER

PS: If you are a woman and at this point feel angry, degraded or discriminated against, just remember that Beer would experience none of those feelings, let alone express them, an extra point for BEER

zharvey · 02-22-2006, 01:52 PM

Vagina takes the cake. Beer is your reward at the end of the night for failing to get the former.

SirLance · 02-22-2006, 05:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LoganSnake

10. Too much beer and you'll think you see flying saucers. Too much vagina and you'll think you've seen God.

That made me laugh out loud!

Quote:

Originally Posted by LoganSnake

12. In most countries there's a tax on beer.

Hush lad, you'll give congress ideas.

Good list!

Delvid · 02-23-2006, 11:33 AM

I mix both and have great results.

02-22-2006, 01:11 PM	#1 (permalink)
LoganSnake We work alone Location: Cake Town	Beer vs. Vagina 1.Beer is always wet. Vagina needs a little work. One point to BEER 2.Warm beer tastes awful. One point to VAGINA 3.A really cold beer is satisfying. One point to BEER 4.If after taking a swig of your favourite beer you find a hair between your teeth, you may vomit. One point to VAGINA 5. If you get home reeking of beer your wife may get mad, make a scene, kick you out, etc. If you get home reeking of vagina your wife may get mad, kick you out, even leave you. There's definitely a point to be had here, depending on your point of view and personal circumstances. I'll just call it a DRAW for the time being. 6. Ten beers in one night and you can't drive home. Ten vaginas in one night and you don't want to drive anywhere. One point to VAGINA 7. If you have a lot of beer in a public place, your reputation may suffer. If you eat any vagina in public, you become a legend. One point to VAGINA 8. If a cop stops you and you smell of beer you may get arrested. If you smell of vagina he may buy you a beer. One point to VAGINA 9. You normally don't find old beer. One point to BEER 10. Too much beer and you'll think you see flying saucers. Too much vagina and you'll think you've seen God. One point to VAGINA 11. Ripping off a beer bottle label is boring. Ripping off panties is fun. One point to VAGINA 12. In most countries there's a tax on beer. One point to VAGINA 13. If you have another beer the first one never gets pissed off. One point to BEER 14. You can always be sure if you're the first one to open a bottle or a can. One point to BEER 15. If you shake beer it'll get all agitated but eventually it settles down. One point to BEER 16. With beer you always have choice: clear, dark, pilsner, ale, lager, etc. One point to BEER 17. You always know how much beer is going to cost. One point to BEER 18. Beer doesn't have a mother One point to BEER 19. Beer never expects to be hugged for half an hour after you drink it. One point to BEER FINAL SCORE: BEER: 10 VAGINA: 8 That's it! The matter is settled, the clear winner is: BEER PS: If you are a woman and at this point feel angry, degraded or discriminated against, just remember that Beer would experience none of those feelings, let alone express them, an extra point for BEER __________________ Maturity is knowing you were an idiot in the past. Wisdom is knowing that you'll be an idiot in the future. Common sense is knowing that you should try not to be an idiot now. - J. Jacques Last edited by LoganSnake; 02-22-2006 at 01:16 PM..

02-22-2006, 01:52 PM	#2 (permalink)
zharvey Upright Location: upstate NY	Vagina takes the cake. Beer is your reward at the end of the night for failing to get the former. __________________ "Forty-three species of parrot? Nipples for men?? SLUGS!! God created slugs?!? I mean, are we not in the hands of a complete lunatic? If I had had my way, we would have started with laser beams, 8 o'clock, Day 1." -Evil

02-23-2006, 11:33 AM	#4 (permalink)
Delvid Insane Location: Missouri	I mix both and have great results.