The Bearded Men of Space Station 11 - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

Batman976 · 01-26-2004, 12:59 AM

Announcer: The Bearded Men of Space Station 11.

Tom: Men, I'd like to introduce you to the new Marshall of Space Station 11, Mr. Rob Jones.

Marshall (Mike S): Gentlemen. Now, as you all know, you are the Bearded Men of Space Station 11. And as we all know, beards do not grow in space. As such, it is my belief that you five men, from now on I will refer to as the Bearded Men of Space Station 11, are actually aliens, and as such, should be committed to life imprisonment in space jail. Are there any questions?

(all bearded men raise their hands)

Marshall: Yeah, Baker, what aren't you clear about?

Baker (Mike B): The part about the beards, sir?

Marshall: Gentlemen, I need not remind you that this galaxy has an atmosphere of negative 5. This is an atmosphere in which beards cannot grow.

Ben: But in Space Station 11 we have Earth's atmosphere.

Marshall: Beards cannot grow in space.

David: But they can grow here on Space Station 11.

Marshall: Aliens can grow beards, but not people.

Todd: People can grow beards in space, too.

Marshall: People cannot grow beard in space.

Mike B: With all due respect Marshall, you're wrong about the beards.

Marshall: Well, I think I'm right about the beards.

Todd: But you're wrong, Marshall. People can grow beards.

Marshall: On Earth, maybe. But I don't think they can grow them in space.

Tom: You're kidding about the beards, right?

Marshall: No. Men cannot grow beards in space.

Ben: But I have a beard.

Marshall: Well, then you're an alien.

Ben: No I'm not.

Marshall: Yes you are.

Ben: No, I'm not.

Marshall: Well, then you can't grow a beard.

David: But he has a beard.

Marshall: Well, then he's an alien.

Tom: He's not. He's from Pittsburg.

Marshall: Nuh-uh.

Mike B: I'm sorry Marshall, but you're just wrong about the beards.

Marshall: No. No, I'm not.

Announcer: The Bearded Men of Space Station 11

JazzmanAl · 01-26-2004, 09:41 PM

You, my friend, have given me something to ponder for ages to come.

Crack · 01-27-2004, 12:43 PM

Sounds very Python-ish..is it?

Spinach_Indeed · 01-27-2004, 10:44 PM

WTFI'mdurnk

Junchbailey · 01-28-2004, 09:21 AM

That's a skit from The State. It was a sketch comedy show on MTV in the mid-90s. I though the show was hilarious.

Iliftrocks · 01-28-2004, 12:25 PM

Sounds like the justification for war with Iraq.....

Batman976 · 01-28-2004, 03:11 PM

Saddam Hussein can't grow a beard in space.

01-26-2004, 12:59 AM	#1 (permalink)
Batman976 is you wicked? Location: I live in a giant bucket.	The Bearded Men of Space Station 11 Announcer: The Bearded Men of Space Station 11. Tom: Men, I'd like to introduce you to the new Marshall of Space Station 11, Mr. Rob Jones. Marshall (Mike S): Gentlemen. Now, as you all know, you are the Bearded Men of Space Station 11. And as we all know, beards do not grow in space. As such, it is my belief that you five men, from now on I will refer to as the Bearded Men of Space Station 11, are actually aliens, and as such, should be committed to life imprisonment in space jail. Are there any questions? (all bearded men raise their hands) Marshall: Yeah, Baker, what aren't you clear about? Baker (Mike B): The part about the beards, sir? Marshall: Gentlemen, I need not remind you that this galaxy has an atmosphere of negative 5. This is an atmosphere in which beards cannot grow. Ben: But in Space Station 11 we have Earth's atmosphere. Marshall: Beards cannot grow in space. David: But they can grow here on Space Station 11. Marshall: Aliens can grow beards, but not people. Todd: People can grow beards in space, too. Marshall: People cannot grow beard in space. Mike B: With all due respect Marshall, you're wrong about the beards. Marshall: Well, I think I'm right about the beards. Todd: But you're wrong, Marshall. People can grow beards. Marshall: On Earth, maybe. But I don't think they can grow them in space. Tom: You're kidding about the beards, right? Marshall: No. Men cannot grow beards in space. Ben: But I have a beard. Marshall: Well, then you're an alien. Ben: No I'm not. Marshall: Yes you are. Ben: No, I'm not. Marshall: Well, then you can't grow a beard. David: But he has a beard. Marshall: Well, then he's an alien. Tom: He's not. He's from Pittsburg. Marshall: Nuh-uh. Mike B: I'm sorry Marshall, but you're just wrong about the beards. Marshall: No. No, I'm not. Announcer: The Bearded Men of Space Station 11 __________________ The following statement is true. The preceding statement was false.

01-26-2004, 09:41 PM	#2 (permalink)
JazzmanAl Crazy Location: Iowa?	You, my friend, have given me something to ponder for ages to come. __________________ I should have been a pair of ragged claws Scuttling across the floors of silent seas. -The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock, T.S. Eliot Your dumber then me.

01-27-2004, 12:43 PM	#3 (permalink)
Crack Misanthropic Location: Ohio! yay!	added a "y" to ver... Sounds very Python-ish..is it? __________________ Crack, you and I are long overdue for a vicious bout of mansex. ~Halx

01-27-2004, 10:44 PM	#4 (permalink)
Spinach_Indeed Banned? Location: Artic Tundra	WTFI'mdurnk __________________ Spinach in Need is Spinach Indeed

01-28-2004, 09:21 AM	#5 (permalink)
Junchbailey Psycho Location: Columbia Falls, MT	That's a skit from The State. It was a sketch comedy show on MTV in the mid-90s. I though the show was hilarious. __________________ Hey guys -- I finally got a semen sample after pumping on my wiener for 2 whole days

01-28-2004, 12:25 PM	#6 (permalink)
Iliftrocks Junkie Location: Near Raleigh, NC	Sounds like the justification for war with Iraq..... __________________ bill hicks - "I don't mean to sound bitter, cold, or cruel, but I am, so that's how it comes out."

01-28-2004, 03:11 PM	#7 (permalink)
Batman976 is you wicked? Location: I live in a giant bucket.	Saddam Hussein can't grow a beard in space. __________________ The following statement is true. The preceding statement was false.