Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community  

Go Back   Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community > Chatter > Tilted Fun Zone


 
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 11-08-2003, 03:49 PM   #1 (permalink)
Delicious
 
Reese's Avatar
 
Beer makes you smarter.

This goes a long way towards explaining a lot of things: A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members.

In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, we all know, kills brain cells, but naturally it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine.

And that's why you always feel smarter after a few beers.
__________________
“It is better to be rich and healthy than poor and sick” - Dave Barry
Reese is offline  
Old 11-08-2003, 04:16 PM   #2 (permalink)
Hiding Out
 
Hmm, it makes sense. But what happens when all the stupid cells are dead? The smart ones start getting analy molested.
__________________
Say yes to the 'Tilted Roleplaying' Forum

http://www.tfproject.org/tfp/showthread.php?s=&threadid=1932&highlight=petition
TerresqueÜ is offline  
Old 11-08-2003, 04:18 PM   #3 (permalink)
What's beyond psycho?
 
torgone's Avatar
 
Location: Still out there
That makes perfect sense!
I'm going to go have a beer right now and thin the herd!
Thanks cybermike!!!
__________________
"Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read."
Groucho Marx
torgone is offline  
Old 11-08-2003, 04:18 PM   #4 (permalink)
‚±‚̈ó˜U‚ª–Ú‚É“ü‚ç‚Ê‚©
 
Location: College
If that was true, wouldn't the effect be permanent?

Beer does not make one smarter.

Good gin, however, will enhance one's intellectual skills.
lordjeebus is offline  
Old 11-08-2003, 06:46 PM   #5 (permalink)
Junkie
 
Stiltzkin's Avatar
 
Quote:
Originally posted by TerresqueÜ
Hmm, it makes sense. But what happens when all the stupid cells are dead? The smart ones start getting analy molested.
LOL!!!! Niiiice. I love subtle humor like this!

__________________
The most important thing in this world is love.
Stiltzkin is offline  
Old 11-08-2003, 10:30 PM   #6 (permalink)
::::::::::::::::::::::::: :.
 
bernadette's Avatar
 
Location: this ain't kansas, toto
wow. your mom just got email?

anyway, hehe i always love this one. each & every single 50 thousand times someone emails it to me.

this is a good one. cheers!
__________________
.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.
bernadette is offline  
Old 11-09-2003, 09:49 AM   #7 (permalink)
It wasnt me
 
tekaweni's Avatar
 
Location: Scotland
It also makes you stronger, braver and a better driver
__________________
If you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always gotten
tekaweni is offline  
Old 11-09-2003, 09:54 AM   #8 (permalink)
Fly
see the links to my music?
 
Fly's Avatar
 
Location: Beautiful British Columbia
i should be a fuckin' genius by now then.
__________________
BASTARD

SterlingStudios
Fly is offline  
Old 11-09-2003, 09:57 AM   #9 (permalink)
Desert Rat
 
spived2's Avatar
 
Location: Arizona
Plus it makes women hotter!
__________________

"This visage, no mere veneer of vanity, is it vestige of the vox populi, now vacant, vanished, as the once vital voice of the verisimilitude now venerates what they once vilified. However, this valorous visitation of a by-gone vexation, stands vivified, and has vowed to vanquish these venal and virulent vermin vanguarding vice and vouchsafing the violently vicious and voracious violation of volition. The only verdict is vengeance; a vendetta, held as a votive, not in vain, for the value and veracity of such shall one day vindicate the vigilant and the virtuous. Verily, this vichyssoise of verbiage veers most verbose vis-à-vis an introduction, and so it is my very good honor to meet you and you may call me V."
- V
spived2 is offline  
Old 11-09-2003, 10:40 AM   #10 (permalink)
Psycho
 
Thats funny because it actually makes sence if you think about it...lol
Rudel73 is offline  
Old 11-09-2003, 11:49 AM   #11 (permalink)
Ssssssssss
 
Kaos's Avatar
 
Location: Ontario
heh, I just re-read that from an e-mail I got like a month ago...still funny
Kaos is offline  
Old 11-09-2003, 11:52 AM   #12 (permalink)
Registered User
 
Location: Wales, UK
That makes me feel much better about my excessive drinking. Cheers for that.
wannabenakid247 is offline  
Old 11-09-2003, 12:32 PM   #13 (permalink)
Delicious
 
Reese's Avatar
 
This same theory also applys to womens looks because it's the weak braincells that obscure all women's beauty. So you don't see what they really look like until you're loaded.

However, Having too many beers will make you a Genius, and we all know genius' border on insanity so make you don't take it too far...

Quick note: I got this in my email from my mom exactly 2 years ago today. I guess it was more popular than I had thought :P
__________________
“It is better to be rich and healthy than poor and sick” - Dave Barry

Last edited by Reese; 11-09-2003 at 12:36 PM..
Reese is offline  
Old 11-09-2003, 02:07 PM   #14 (permalink)
Insane
 
Location: The Internet
This is by far the dumbest thing I have heard in a long time. Only a truely stupid person would come up with this notion.

This is like saying .. electronics become better as capacitors and resistors are removed from the circut.

Then again, the people who believe this also believe that we only use 10% of our brain.

News flash ... you use 100% of your brain! And killing off brain cells (ie. neurons) in such regions as the substancia nigra (literally translated to black stuff) and the locus ceorruleus is called Parkinson's disease.

To anybody who thinks that killing off "weak" brain-cells is a good idea: I invite you to open up your computer right now, and make a few random cuts in the motherboard's traces .. see how well that goes over.
__________________
rm -f /bin/laden
Sapper is offline  
Old 12-01-2003, 07:27 PM   #15 (permalink)
There's someone in my head, but its not me
 
Zotz's Avatar
 
Its an entertaining notion...
Zotz is offline  
Old 12-01-2003, 07:58 PM   #16 (permalink)
Addict
 
Evil Milkman's Avatar
 
Location: Illinois
I read that back a while ago, funny thought.
Evil Milkman is offline  
Old 12-02-2003, 07:51 PM   #17 (permalink)
Semi-Atomic
 
Location: Home.
One of the funniest thing I'd ever heard was an officer sitting outside, studying for his college business class, drinking a beer; he looks up and says "Why is it that book plus no beer equals 2.5 and book plus beer equals 3.8?"
__________________
Someday, someone will best me.
But it won't be today, and it won't be you.
Jonsgirl is offline  
Old 12-03-2003, 03:25 AM   #18 (permalink)
Sky Piercer
 
CSflim's Avatar
 
Location: Ireland
Sapper relax! Its a joke! You're in the nonsense forum!
__________________
CSflim is offline  
Old 12-03-2003, 03:29 AM   #19 (permalink)
Insane
 
Location: an indelible crawl through the gutters
mmmmmmmmm....... BEER!
__________________
-LIFE IS ABSURD-
taliendo is offline  
Old 12-04-2003, 12:11 AM   #20 (permalink)
Psycho
 
Location: Where hockey pucks run rampant
Ah, the memories of Cheers.
__________________
Lead me, follow me, or get out of my way!
duckduck is offline  
Old 12-04-2003, 02:20 PM   #21 (permalink)
Psycho
 
herostar's Avatar
 
Location: South Dakota
I knew I wasn't the only one who thought this
__________________
Got time to chill?
herostar is offline  
Old 12-05-2003, 11:24 AM   #22 (permalink)
Insane
 
Location: portland the land of liquid sun shine
i like that way of thinking lol
__________________
vvvvvvvvrrrrrrrrrrroooooooooooooooooooooommmmmm
etardedraverboy is offline  
 

Tags
beer, makes, smarter

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On



All times are GMT -8. The time now is 06:32 PM.

Tilted Forum Project

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0 PL2
© 2002-2012 Tilted Forum Project

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62