Once again we are begging the question. - Page 4 - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

-Ever- · 05-12-2003, 06:48 PM

Q. Dude you're going to hell. Why in the world did you steal 30 bag lunches?

A. Sorry sir, this party is strictly for invited members only.

analog · 05-12-2003, 10:43 PM

Q: Hey, I'm uh... with the... DJ? Band? I know the owner.

A: No, but i'll be damned if it don't squeek from time to time.

Go_AVS · 05-12-2003, 11:07 PM

Q: Why did you let that go in the meeting?

A: First and third.

mirevolver · 05-13-2003, 12:25 AM

Q: Which suspect in the lineup stole your Preperation H creme?

A: She does that like you wouldn't believe.

eyeronic · 05-13-2003, 12:27 AM

Q: Does your maid lick the stains off the sheets?

A. Not unless you spread them really well.

l_o_c · 05-13-2003, 12:34 AM

Q: Can I ever look like Goatse?

A: That's what I'm doing here!

Fly · 05-13-2003, 04:21 AM

Q:is that what you're doin',jerkin' it to the titty board?

A:go ahead,look right at it,it's safe.

krazykemist · 05-13-2003, 04:44 AM

Q: Is it safe to open goatse.jpg?

A: Because the cream feels really good.

mrsandman · 05-13-2003, 05:05 AM

Q: You have a bleeding wound, why are you using Neosporin?

A: I was running full speed.

vermin · 05-13-2003, 05:36 AM

Q: Hey, Nose, why did you drown all those children?

A: Oooohh! Because it burns and itches!

Binder · 05-13-2003, 06:22 AM

q: why do you need my preparation h?

a: a kickass stereo

GakFace · 05-13-2003, 06:55 AM

Q: WHAT was stolen out of your car?

A: No problem! I do that every morning.....

Quadraton · 05-13-2003, 08:35 AM

Q: Is there no one who can solve world hunger, create world peace, and fight off the alien invasion?

A: Because I found his lack of faith...disturbing.

-Ever- · 05-13-2003, 09:15 AM

Q. So tell me again, why did you decide to put your brother up for sale on Ebay?

A. Because she caught me sleeping with our donkey again.

jets · 05-13-2003, 12:36 PM

Q: Why'd yer wife bitch-slap you so many times?

A: Somewhere between the Bermuda triangle and the Equator.

TerresqueÜ · 05-13-2003, 12:38 PM

Q : Where did all those ships disapear?

A: A piece of salmon

-Ever- · 05-13-2003, 01:21 PM

Q. Now class, for our next question: Who can tell me what World War 5 was fought over?

A. It was that ill tempered goose from down the street!

mirevolver · 05-13-2003, 03:48 PM

Q: Who was talking about Afliac Insurance?

A: I get amazing pleasure from it.

SocialAbortion · 05-13-2003, 03:54 PM

Q: Why didn't you feed the walrus yesterday?

A: My god, it's huge.

maximusveritas · 05-13-2003, 03:59 PM

Q: Now do you see why I didn't feed it?

A: Ask your mother.

DEI37 · 05-13-2003, 04:11 PM

Q. Does sex feel like apple pie?

A. Dammit, boy! How many times have I told you?!?!

Tophat665 · 05-13-2003, 07:03 PM

Burn then Pilliage or Pilliage then Burn?

Fourteen inches limp.

mrsandman · 05-13-2003, 07:12 PM

Q: How low did you do the the limbo, and what was your secret?

A: I guess I just stopped at the right time.

l_o_c · 05-13-2003, 08:24 PM

Q: So why didn't she get pregnant if you didn't use a condom?

A: No, it's 12:03.

Fly · 05-13-2003, 08:39 PM

Q:so you masterbate at midnite on fridays?

A:yeah...this long weekend.

madsenj37 · 05-14-2003, 12:22 AM

Q: Have you ever seen your grandparents making whoopi?

A: That is not what she said.

Spinach_Indeed · 05-14-2003, 03:53 PM

Q: So, I hear your girlfriend told you about that horrible STD she has, eh?

A: That's the way it's meant to be

iccky · 05-14-2003, 04:04 PM

Q: How the hell is KISS still touring?

A: You can take a hourse to water but you can't make him drink

-Ever- · 05-14-2003, 05:14 PM

Q. Right, so after dinner we go back to my place. After a bit I pulled it out and she just sat there frozen...what gives?

A. I'm sorry sir, I cannot help your right now, this is the non emergency line. Please hang up and dial 9-1-1

mirevolver · 05-14-2003, 05:25 PM

Q: I've superglued my balls to my leg. Can you send the paramedics over?

A: We will cross that bridge when we come to it.

l_o_c · 05-14-2003, 05:37 PM

Q: So, exactly how are we going to travel around the world in a car?

A: No, it's over there!

mrsandman · 05-14-2003, 09:49 PM

Q:I've misplaced my cadaver, would you mind pointing it out to me?

A: I always do, it is just a habit I can't shake.

mrsandman · 05-14-2003, 09:50 PM

-Ever- · 05-14-2003, 10:41 PM

Q. And why do you have your finger up your butt again?

A. She had it coming!

l_o_c · 05-14-2003, 11:03 PM

Q: Why did you kick Joan Rivers in the face?

A: He's an ugly fucking kid.

-Ever- · 05-14-2003, 11:09 PM

Q. Yea this has been a pretty good college reunion. Oh I heard you had a child a few years back. How's that going?

A. Sorry, I wish I could go but you know how I get at those things.

teph · 05-14-2003, 11:44 PM

Q: So, I guess your fiance will be expecting you at your wedding any time now?

A: I did that once, and they stayed that way.

l_o_c · 05-15-2003, 12:56 AM

Q: Doing any more puppetry of the penis tricks?

A: Fuck you, dude. That's not cool.

iRtehCrispeh · 05-15-2003, 03:49 AM

Dont touch my ass! (not really a question but it fits

)

Why the hell would i do that?!

mrsandman · 05-15-2003, 06:04 AM

Q:Why don't you study hard, stay sober, be self sufficient and independent and strive to the best of your abilities?

A: It is just easier this way.

05-12-2003, 06:48 PM	#121 (permalink)
-Ever- Junkie Location: San Francisco	Q. Dude you're going to hell. Why in the world did you steal 30 bag lunches? A. Sorry sir, this party is strictly for invited members only. __________________ Embracing the goddess energy within yourselves will bring all of you to a new understanding and valuing of life. A vision that inspires you to live and love on planet Earth. Like a priceless jewel buried in dark layers of soil and stone, Earth radiates her brilliant beauty into the caverns of space and time. Perhaps you are aware of those who watch over your home And experience of this place to visit and play with reality. You are becoming aware of yourself as a gamemaster... --Acknowledge your weaknesses--

05-12-2003, 11:07 PM	#123 (permalink)
Go_AVS CSU RAM fan Location: Hockey time....	Q: Why did you let that go in the meeting? A: First and third. __________________ MIA...

05-13-2003, 12:25 AM	#124 (permalink)
mirevolver Inspired by the mind's eye. Location: Between the darkness and the light.	Q: Which suspect in the lineup stole your Preperation H creme? A: She does that like you wouldn't believe. __________________ Aside from my great plans to become the future dictator of the moon, I have little interest in political discussions.

05-13-2003, 12:27 AM	#125 (permalink)
eyeronic I run E. Location: New York	Q: Does your maid lick the stains off the sheets? A. Not unless you spread them really well. __________________ I hold with those that favor fire.

05-13-2003, 04:21 AM	#127 (permalink)
Fly see the links to my music? Location: Beautiful British Columbia	Q:is that what you're doin',jerkin' it to the titty board? A:go ahead,look right at it,it's safe. __________________ BASTARD SterlingStudios

05-12-2003, 10:43 PM	#122 (permalink)
analog Banned	Q: Hey, I'm uh... with the... DJ? Band? I know the owner. A: No, but i'll be damned if it don't squeek from time to time.

05-13-2003, 12:34 AM	#126 (permalink)
l_o_c Crazy	Q: Can I ever look like Goatse? A: That's what I'm doing here!

05-13-2003, 04:44 AM	#128 (permalink)
krazykemist Psycho Location: New Orleans	Q: Is it safe to open goatse.jpg? A: Because the cream feels really good. __________________ "Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself." -- Tolstoy

05-13-2003, 05:05 AM	#129 (permalink)
mrsandman Addict Location: 3rd coast area	Q: You have a bleeding wound, why are you using Neosporin? A: I was running full speed. __________________ Hail to ALL the troops and shadow warriors.

05-13-2003, 05:36 AM	#130 (permalink)
vermin Indifferent to anti-matter Location: Tucson, AZ	Q: Hey, Nose, why did you drown all those children? A: Oooohh! Because it burns and itches! __________________ If puns were sausages, this would be the wurst.

05-13-2003, 06:22 AM	#131 (permalink)
Binder Insane Location: between lost and confused	q: why do you need my preparation h? a: a kickass stereo

05-13-2003, 06:55 AM	#132 (permalink)
GakFace Go Ninja, Go Ninja Go!! Location: IN, USA	Q: WHAT was stolen out of your car? A: No problem! I do that every morning..... __________________ RoboBlaster: Welcome to the club! Not that I'm in the club. And there really isn'a a club in the first place. But if there was a club and if I was in it, I would definitely welcome you to it.

05-13-2003, 08:35 AM	#133 (permalink)
Quadraton Addict Location: Ottawa, ON, Canada	Q: Is there no one who can solve world hunger, create world peace, and fight off the alien invasion? A: Because I found his lack of faith...disturbing. __________________ "A witty saying proves nothing" - Voltaire

05-13-2003, 09:15 AM	#134 (permalink)
-Ever- Junkie Location: San Francisco	Q. So tell me again, why did you decide to put your brother up for sale on Ebay? A. Because she caught me sleeping with our donkey again. __________________ Embracing the goddess energy within yourselves will bring all of you to a new understanding and valuing of life. A vision that inspires you to live and love on planet Earth. Like a priceless jewel buried in dark layers of soil and stone, Earth radiates her brilliant beauty into the caverns of space and time. Perhaps you are aware of those who watch over your home And experience of this place to visit and play with reality. You are becoming aware of yourself as a gamemaster... --Acknowledge your weaknesses--

05-13-2003, 12:36 PM	#135 (permalink)
jets Insane	Q: Why'd yer wife bitch-slap you so many times? A: Somewhere between the Bermuda triangle and the Equator. __________________ Hey. Wasn't Me.

05-13-2003, 12:38 PM	#136 (permalink)
TerresqueÜ Hiding Out	Q : Where did all those ships disapear? A: A piece of salmon __________________ Say yes to the 'Tilted Roleplaying' Forum http://www.tfproject.org/tfp/showthread.php?s=&threadid=1932&highlight=petition

05-13-2003, 01:21 PM	#137 (permalink)
-Ever- Junkie Location: San Francisco	Q. Now class, for our next question: Who can tell me what World War 5 was fought over? A. It was that ill tempered goose from down the street! __________________ Embracing the goddess energy within yourselves will bring all of you to a new understanding and valuing of life. A vision that inspires you to live and love on planet Earth. Like a priceless jewel buried in dark layers of soil and stone, Earth radiates her brilliant beauty into the caverns of space and time. Perhaps you are aware of those who watch over your home And experience of this place to visit and play with reality. You are becoming aware of yourself as a gamemaster... --Acknowledge your weaknesses--

05-13-2003, 03:48 PM	#138 (permalink)
mirevolver Inspired by the mind's eye. Location: Between the darkness and the light.	Q: Who was talking about Afliac Insurance? A: I get amazing pleasure from it. __________________ Aside from my great plans to become the future dictator of the moon, I have little interest in political discussions.

05-13-2003, 03:54 PM	#139 (permalink)
SocialAbortion Tilted Location: Somewhere between heaven and hell.	Q: Why didn't you feed the walrus yesterday? A: My god, it's huge. __________________ I like your mom, and it's no fad, I want to marry her and be your dad. I am un chien andalusia.

05-13-2003, 03:59 PM	#140 (permalink)
maximusveritas Winner	Q: Now do you see why I didn't feed it? A: Ask your mother.

05-13-2003, 04:11 PM	#141 (permalink)
DEI37 Go faster! Location: Wisconsin	Q. Does sex feel like apple pie? A. Dammit, boy! How many times have I told you?!?! __________________ Generally speaking, if you were to get what you really deserve, you might be unpleasantly surprised.

05-13-2003, 07:03 PM	#142 (permalink)
Tophat665 Minion of the scaléd ones Location: Northeast Jesusland	Burn then Pilliage or Pilliage then Burn? Fourteen inches limp. __________________ Light a man a fire, and he will be warm while it burns. Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

05-13-2003, 07:12 PM	#143 (permalink)
mrsandman Addict Location: 3rd coast area	Q: How low did you do the the limbo, and what was your secret? A: I guess I just stopped at the right time. __________________ Hail to ALL the troops and shadow warriors.

05-13-2003, 08:24 PM	#144 (permalink)
l_o_c Crazy	Q: So why didn't she get pregnant if you didn't use a condom? A: No, it's 12:03.

05-13-2003, 08:39 PM	#145 (permalink)
Fly see the links to my music? Location: Beautiful British Columbia	Q:so you masterbate at midnite on fridays? A:yeah...this long weekend. __________________ BASTARD SterlingStudios

05-14-2003, 12:22 AM	#146 (permalink)
madsenj37 Still searching... Location: NorCal For Life	Q: Have you ever seen your grandparents making whoopi? A: That is not what she said. __________________ "Only two things are certain: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not certain about the universe." -- Albert Einstein

05-14-2003, 03:53 PM	#147 (permalink)
Spinach_Indeed Banned? Location: Artic Tundra	Q: So, I hear your girlfriend told you about that horrible STD she has, eh? A: That's the way it's meant to be __________________ Spinach in Need is Spinach Indeed

05-14-2003, 04:04 PM	#148 (permalink)
iccky Psycho Location: Princeton, NJ	Q: How the hell is KISS still touring? A: You can take a hourse to water but you can't make him drink

05-14-2003, 05:14 PM	#149 (permalink)
-Ever- Junkie Location: San Francisco	Q. Right, so after dinner we go back to my place. After a bit I pulled it out and she just sat there frozen...what gives? A. I'm sorry sir, I cannot help your right now, this is the non emergency line. Please hang up and dial 9-1-1 __________________ Embracing the goddess energy within yourselves will bring all of you to a new understanding and valuing of life. A vision that inspires you to live and love on planet Earth. Like a priceless jewel buried in dark layers of soil and stone, Earth radiates her brilliant beauty into the caverns of space and time. Perhaps you are aware of those who watch over your home And experience of this place to visit and play with reality. You are becoming aware of yourself as a gamemaster... --Acknowledge your weaknesses--

05-14-2003, 05:25 PM	#150 (permalink)
mirevolver Inspired by the mind's eye. Location: Between the darkness and the light.	Q: I've superglued my balls to my leg. Can you send the paramedics over? A: We will cross that bridge when we come to it. __________________ Aside from my great plans to become the future dictator of the moon, I have little interest in political discussions.

05-14-2003, 05:37 PM	#151 (permalink)
l_o_c Crazy	Q: So, exactly how are we going to travel around the world in a car? A: No, it's over there!

05-14-2003, 09:49 PM	#152 (permalink)
mrsandman Addict Location: 3rd coast area	Q:I've misplaced my cadaver, would you mind pointing it out to me? A: I always do, it is just a habit I can't shake. __________________ Hail to ALL the troops and shadow warriors.

05-14-2003, 09:50 PM	#153 (permalink)
mrsandman Addict Location: 3rd coast area	edit __________________ Hail to ALL the troops and shadow warriors.

05-14-2003, 10:41 PM	#154 (permalink)
-Ever- Junkie Location: San Francisco	Q. And why do you have your finger up your butt again? A. She had it coming! __________________ Embracing the goddess energy within yourselves will bring all of you to a new understanding and valuing of life. A vision that inspires you to live and love on planet Earth. Like a priceless jewel buried in dark layers of soil and stone, Earth radiates her brilliant beauty into the caverns of space and time. Perhaps you are aware of those who watch over your home And experience of this place to visit and play with reality. You are becoming aware of yourself as a gamemaster... --Acknowledge your weaknesses--

05-14-2003, 11:03 PM	#155 (permalink)
l_o_c Crazy	Q: Why did you kick Joan Rivers in the face? A: He's an ugly fucking kid.