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Old 07-09-2003, 04:25 PM   #1 (permalink)
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the girlfriend matrix

It's all around you. You can feel it when you get off work. You can hear it in the telephone's empty dial tone. You can sense it when you put the toilet seat down.
It's all around you.
Unfortunatley, no one can be told exactly what the Girlfriend Matrix is...you have to see it for yourself.
But we can attempt to describe what is known.
Here are some general warning sings that you may be stuck inside the Girlfriend Matrix:
---Bovine-like contentment.
---Feelings of security and/or safety.
---Unspecified happiness.
---Lack of urges, whims, and spontaneous behavior.

If you have a girlfriend and are experiencing any of these symptoms, or know someone who is, please GET HELP.
Brake up with your girlfriend immediatly!
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Old 07-09-2003, 04:47 PM   #2 (permalink)
Loose Cunt
 
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Location: North Bondi RSL
I have the first three of those four symptoms, and am loving it.

Free advice: Get a real woman
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Old 07-09-2003, 06:13 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Location: SWLA
lets you?
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Old 07-09-2003, 06:30 PM   #4 (permalink)
Loose Cunt
 
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Location: North Bondi RSL
by saying 'let's him' he means 'hates it with the fire of a thousand suns'
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What's easier to believe: that a guy was born without sex in the manner of several Greek demigods and grew up to be able to transmute liquids and alter his body density yet couldn't escape government execution, or that three freemasons in a vehicle made with aluminum foil in an era before digital technology escaped our atmosphere, landing on the moon, broadcasted from there, and then flew back without burning up?
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Old 07-09-2003, 06:43 PM   #5 (permalink)
lonely rolling star
 
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Location: Seattle.
aw. that bitch. but alas, that's what i did to my last gf... hehe.

i tied her to a leash and left her in the bathroom while i went shopping for some nice dresses.

um, probably too much information
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The wisdom of life consists in the elimination of non-essentials.
"
-Lin Yutang

hearts, by d.a.
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Old 07-09-2003, 07:00 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Location: Artic Tundra
I don't see why Women need the seat to be down. It's not like I don't have to sit down on the roilet every once and a while. Unless women go into the bathroom backwards, with the lights off, and leap onto the roilet without warning then I don't think it's that hard to miss.

I accidently sat down on a Pooper with the seat up, and plunged my white ass into the cold froths. I've never done it since. I suppose it does look nicer, but if that's the case, just put the cover down as well.
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