Reveal the previous poster's deepest, darkest secret... - Page 72 - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

bundy · 09-24-2003, 10:33 PM

well, yes, bernie, i was nude.
and i do often wonder about what colour, if any, my next laces shall be.

In a past life, Bernadette was in fact a lover of the great Sun King, Louis XIV.
As a (rather lewd) gift, the great, lavish king designed a glass in the shape of her breast from which to sip his champagne.
Outraged, Bernadette, designed another champagne glass, this time shaped in the likeness of his penis (hence the champagne flute).
however, when he found out that this glass was only 3 inches deep (or long), he arranged for her to visit Madame Guillotine.
Strangely, Bernadette, throughout all of her lives since, has carried a scar on her neck. she has also been able to let herself savour the lovely taste of fine champagne.

Fly · 09-25-2003, 04:36 AM

bundy likes to chase the local wildlife around while wearing a garter belt,bikini top and sequins stilletto heels...screaming at the top of his lungs....

OI,OI,OI,......

Beltruckus · 09-25-2003, 06:33 AM

Flyman, several years back, shot a dear and made a deer suit so that some day if someone happened to be chasing wildlife around wearing a garter belt, bikini top and some form of shoes he could participate in the fun.

Pyrate · 09-25-2003, 07:17 AM

Beltruckus is going about attempting to prove that the world is square.

His main weapons in this fight? A camera and Photosuite...

Pheatius · 09-25-2003, 07:38 AM

Pyrate was once a Norse god (a lesser god). Pator the Gender crossed. He would hang around the Rainbow Bridge looking for young strapping Norse boys freshly killed in battle. He would then 'teach' them how things worked in the afterlife. He was always impeccably dressed, but gave it all up after Thor spurned him publicly in front of mortals.

uncle phil · 09-25-2003, 12:13 PM

pheatius only owns one sock...

bluearmy · 09-25-2003, 12:30 PM

uncle phil is dyslexic and has sold his soul to santa.

soopadoopa · 09-25-2003, 01:53 PM

Blue army likes to coon hunt in the middle of summer naked except for his coonskin cap.

Fly · 09-25-2003, 07:23 PM

soop likes to smell women's armpits....he figures that's what their crotches smell like.

tryin' to get an up on them i guess...........

paddyjoe · 09-26-2003, 04:22 AM

speaking of trying to get something up.......well, poor flyman can only speak of such things

how nostalgic.....................eh?

Conclamo Ludus · 09-26-2003, 05:30 AM

paddyjoe claims to have invented the "electric slide" and the "hustle".

Midlandmadman · 09-26-2003, 07:45 AM

Conclamo Ludus can only masturbate to re-runs of the Brady bunch.

Beltruckus · 09-26-2003, 08:03 AM

All of Midlandmans clothing have a P on them for Pancakes, because he likes to eat them for breakfast lunch and dinner.

uncle phil · 09-26-2003, 11:14 AM

damn, belt's still hanging around that street corner, but at least the wind's picking up so he'll be able to move on in a little while...

paddyjoe · 09-26-2003, 04:13 PM

Unfortunately, it was an ill wind, generated when uncle phil bent over at the waist and blew out the seams of his [stained] sleeper jammies.

Fremen · 09-26-2003, 07:40 PM

pj taught his cat to use the toilet, but he forgot to teach it to knock before entering the bathroom. Damnit!!

bundy · 09-26-2003, 08:16 PM

Fremen has been training (with little success i should add) his pack of wild hunting toads to play tennis.
one day he hopes to have his toads play an exhibition match at flushing meadows.

QuasiMojo · 09-26-2003, 08:38 PM

bundy has hemmorhoids that extend past the cuff of his pants.
he uses a rusty razor blade to trim them back.

HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Fremen · 09-27-2003, 12:40 AM

Quasi once ran naked in Safeway so the little old ladies could have a thrill and weigh his melons.

Exhibition match, ha!
bundy, my toads are s-o-o gonna win the Australian Open.

Fly · 09-27-2003, 05:33 AM

alas poor Fremen's toads were in training ,and,sad to say the road they were practicing on was over come by some punkass street racers and the whole team of toads was obliterated.

paddyjoe · 09-27-2003, 05:56 AM

There wouldn't have been any`56 Chevys in that group, WOULD THERE FLYMAN? We know the grudge you've been carrying because Fremen's toads have been eating all your relatives.

..................eh?

Fly · 09-27-2003, 05:26 PM

PJ dosen't like '56 chevy's...cuz the last time he rode in one,was when his 'ol man locked him in the trunk.

........................eh

World's King · 09-27-2003, 05:35 PM

You ever shove a pencil in your ass...?

Flyman has.

bundy · 09-27-2003, 05:51 PM

you ever had a dream about cane toads playing golf...?

WK has.

richeee · 09-27-2003, 10:31 PM

" And when we meet, which I'm sure we will, all that was then will be there still I'll let it pass and hold my tongue and you will think that I've moved on...."
Bundy is afraid that the quote above will be interpreted as a come-on by Barbara Bush, and that she will demand to see the tongue!

(Good Luck, Bundy!)

QuasiMojo · 09-27-2003, 11:46 PM

richee....why haven't you told your shrink about the agonizing nightmares that you've been having of being anally prepared by a band of
albino chimpanzees?

preluder · 09-28-2003, 02:26 AM

QuasiMojo misses the 80s.... badly.

Fremen · 09-28-2003, 06:10 AM

preluder found his calling when he answered an ad for a Taco Bell test subject. Mmmm, burrito breath.

Kewpie Dan · 09-28-2003, 07:18 AM

The only thing Fremen eats is that weird halloween caramel that comes in the orange and black wrapper that nobody else eats.

Fly · 09-29-2003, 03:46 AM

'ol dan here passes his time by watching cats walk away with their tails in the air.

and he likes it too.

nothin' like a bit 'o pussy eh dan?

bundy · 09-29-2003, 04:47 AM

Flyman will be cheering on his beloved Canadian Rugby Team in this years Rugby World Cup, from his dunny.

even when the wallabies are mauling them, the bokkas are donkey punching them and the kiwis are giving them a cricket score, Flyman will be shouting, cheering and wiping his arse for his big burly tree-chopping boys.

Fremen · 09-29-2003, 05:25 AM

bundy shaves his left armpit hair every other Thursday just to fuck with his sister. (figure that out!)

uncle phil · 09-29-2003, 12:09 PM

fre launders all of bundy's soiled sleeper jammies...for (you guessed it)...FREE...

Kewpie Dan · 09-29-2003, 12:27 PM

uncle phil really loves Will despite all his shenanigans

bundy · 09-29-2003, 11:57 PM

Kewpie couldn´t decide if he wanted to be a Magpie or a Kiwi or a Kea... what a strange mixture of birds you have there.
perhaps this is a fetish...

Conclamo Ludus · 09-30-2003, 07:28 AM

bundy drives a hot pink Kia Rio with a giant spoiler on the back.

Beltruckus · 09-30-2003, 08:54 AM

CL didn't have to think a second before deciding which bird he wanted to be, thats right you guessed it Boobie.

Beltruckus · 09-30-2003, 09:04 AM

Beltruckus wants to be a Titmouse it just so happened that CL's second choice was also the titmouse.

uncle phil · 09-30-2003, 12:42 PM

belt is still hanging around that street corner because he can't remember where he lives...

bundy · 09-30-2003, 07:56 PM

... he´s hoping that one day Phil will give him a job at his dodgy STD identification clinic that he´s been operating on that same street corner for about 10 years now.

09-24-2003, 10:33 PM	#2841 (permalink)
bundy . Location: Tokyo	well, yes, bernie, i was nude. and i do often wonder about what colour, if any, my next laces shall be. In a past life, Bernadette was in fact a lover of the great Sun King, Louis XIV. As a (rather lewd) gift, the great, lavish king designed a glass in the shape of her breast from which to sip his champagne. Outraged, Bernadette, designed another champagne glass, this time shaped in the likeness of his penis (hence the champagne flute). however, when he found out that this glass was only 3 inches deep (or long), he arranged for her to visit Madame Guillotine. Strangely, Bernadette, throughout all of her lives since, has carried a scar on her neck. she has also been able to let herself savour the lovely taste of fine champagne. __________________ Ohayo!!! Last edited by bundy; 09-24-2003 at 10:35 PM..

09-25-2003, 04:36 AM	#2842 (permalink)
Fly see the links to my music? Location: Beautiful British Columbia	bundy likes to chase the local wildlife around while wearing a garter belt,bikini top and sequins stilletto heels...screaming at the top of his lungs.... OI,OI,OI,...... __________________ BASTARD SterlingStudios

09-25-2003, 06:33 AM	#2843 (permalink)
Beltruckus Psycho Location: Salt Lake City	Flyman, several years back, shot a dear and made a deer suit so that some day if someone happened to be chasing wildlife around wearing a garter belt, bikini top and some form of shoes he could participate in the fun. __________________ The most important things are the hardest things to say. They are the things you get ashamed of because words diminish your feelings. Words shrink things that seem timeless when they are in your head to no more than living size when they are brought out. -Stephen King

09-25-2003, 07:17 AM	#2844 (permalink)
Pyrate Psycho Location: London, CorBlimeyLand	Beltruckus is going about attempting to prove that the world is square. His main weapons in this fight? A camera and Photosuite... __________________ ?

09-25-2003, 12:13 PM	#2846 (permalink)
uncle phil comfortably numb... Super Moderator Location: upstate	pheatius only owns one sock... __________________ "We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done." - Robert S. McNamara ----------------------------------------- "We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches... We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles." - Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message" ----------------------------------------- never wrestle with a pig. you both get dirty; the pig likes it.

09-25-2003, 07:38 AM	#2845 (permalink)
Pheatius Insane Location: The South	Pyrate was once a Norse god (a lesser god). Pator the Gender crossed. He would hang around the Rainbow Bridge looking for young strapping Norse boys freshly killed in battle. He would then 'teach' them how things worked in the afterlife. He was always impeccably dressed, but gave it all up after Thor spurned him publicly in front of mortals.

09-25-2003, 12:30 PM	#2847 (permalink)
bluearmy Insane Location: uk	uncle phil is dyslexic and has sold his soul to santa.

09-25-2003, 01:53 PM	#2848 (permalink)
soopadoopa Crazy	Blue army likes to coon hunt in the middle of summer naked except for his coonskin cap.

09-25-2003, 07:23 PM	#2849 (permalink)
Fly see the links to my music? Location: Beautiful British Columbia	soop likes to smell women's armpits....he figures that's what their crotches smell like. tryin' to get an up on them i guess........... __________________ BASTARD SterlingStudios

09-26-2003, 04:22 AM	#2850 (permalink)
paddyjoe through charlatans phone Location: Northcoast	speaking of trying to get something up.......well, poor flyman can only speak of such things how nostalgic.....................eh?

09-26-2003, 05:30 AM	#2851 (permalink)
Conclamo Ludus Modern Man Location: West Michigan	paddyjoe claims to have invented the "electric slide" and the "hustle". __________________ Lord, have mercy on my wicked soul I wouldn't mistreat you baby, for my weight in gold. -Son House, Death Letter Blues

09-26-2003, 07:45 AM	#2852 (permalink)
Midlandmadman Redwing fan extraordinaire Location: Michigan	Conclamo Ludus can only masturbate to re-runs of the Brady bunch. __________________ Its good to be back.

09-26-2003, 08:03 AM	#2853 (permalink)
Beltruckus Psycho Location: Salt Lake City	All of Midlandmans clothing have a P on them for Pancakes, because he likes to eat them for breakfast lunch and dinner. __________________ The most important things are the hardest things to say. They are the things you get ashamed of because words diminish your feelings. Words shrink things that seem timeless when they are in your head to no more than living size when they are brought out. -Stephen King

09-26-2003, 11:14 AM	#2854 (permalink)
uncle phil comfortably numb... Super Moderator Location: upstate	damn, belt's still hanging around that street corner, but at least the wind's picking up so he'll be able to move on in a little while... __________________ "We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done." - Robert S. McNamara ----------------------------------------- "We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches... We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles." - Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message" ----------------------------------------- never wrestle with a pig. you both get dirty; the pig likes it.

09-26-2003, 04:13 PM	#2855 (permalink)
paddyjoe through charlatans phone Location: Northcoast	Unfortunately, it was an ill wind, generated when uncle phil bent over at the waist and blew out the seams of his [stained] sleeper jammies.

09-26-2003, 07:40 PM	#2856 (permalink)
Fremen With a mustache, the cool factor would be too much Location: left side of my couch, East Texas	pj taught his cat to use the toilet, but he forgot to teach it to knock before entering the bathroom. Damnit!! __________________ Google

09-26-2003, 08:16 PM	#2857 (permalink)
bundy . Location: Tokyo	Fremen has been training (with little success i should add) his pack of wild hunting toads to play tennis. one day he hopes to have his toads play an exhibition match at flushing meadows. __________________ Ohayo!!!

09-26-2003, 08:38 PM	#2858 (permalink)
QuasiMojo King Knave Location: Lancaster	bundy has hemmorhoids that extend past the cuff of his pants. he uses a rusty razor blade to trim them back. HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! __________________ AzAbOv ZoBeLoE

09-27-2003, 12:40 AM	#2859 (permalink)
Fremen With a mustache, the cool factor would be too much Location: left side of my couch, East Texas	Quasi once ran naked in Safeway so the little old ladies could have a thrill and weigh his melons. Exhibition match, ha! bundy, my toads are s-o-o gonna win the Australian Open. __________________ Google

09-27-2003, 05:33 AM	#2860 (permalink)
Fly see the links to my music? Location: Beautiful British Columbia	alas poor Fremen's toads were in training ,and,sad to say the road they were practicing on was over come by some punkass street racers and the whole team of toads was obliterated. __________________ BASTARD SterlingStudios

09-27-2003, 05:56 AM	#2861 (permalink)
paddyjoe through charlatans phone Location: Northcoast	There wouldn't have been any`56 Chevys in that group, WOULD THERE FLYMAN? We know the grudge you've been carrying because Fremen's toads have been eating all your relatives. ..................eh?

09-27-2003, 05:26 PM	#2862 (permalink)
Fly see the links to my music? Location: Beautiful British Columbia	PJ dosen't like '56 chevy's...cuz the last time he rode in one,was when his 'ol man locked him in the trunk. ........................eh __________________ BASTARD SterlingStudios

09-27-2003, 05:35 PM	#2863 (permalink)
World's King Here Location: Denver City Denver	You ever shove a pencil in your ass...? Flyman has. __________________ heavy is the head that wears the crown

09-27-2003, 05:51 PM	#2864 (permalink)
bundy . Location: Tokyo	you ever had a dream about cane toads playing golf...? WK has. __________________ Ohayo!!!

09-27-2003, 10:31 PM	#2865 (permalink)
richeee Go Packers! (sigh!) Location: The Lovely Emerald City	" And when we meet, which I'm sure we will, all that was then will be there still I'll let it pass and hold my tongue and you will think that I've moved on...." Bundy is afraid that the quote above will be interpreted as a come-on by Barbara Bush, and that she will demand to see the tongue! (Good Luck, Bundy!) __________________ Pas le cri, le coeur de Minx! .... Where can I stare now?.........I did!!!What about You?

09-27-2003, 11:46 PM	#2866 (permalink)
QuasiMojo King Knave Location: Lancaster	richee....why haven't you told your shrink about the agonizing nightmares that you've been having of being anally prepared by a band of albino chimpanzees? __________________ AzAbOv ZoBeLoE

09-28-2003, 02:26 AM	#2867 (permalink)
preluder Tilted Location: Houston, TX	QuasiMojo misses the 80s.... badly.

09-28-2003, 06:10 AM	#2868 (permalink)
Fremen With a mustache, the cool factor would be too much Location: left side of my couch, East Texas	preluder found his calling when he answered an ad for a Taco Bell test subject. Mmmm, burrito breath. __________________ Google

09-28-2003, 07:18 AM	#2869 (permalink)
Kewpie Dan powered by the souls of dead warriors Location: In the rain, dying	The only thing Fremen eats is that weird halloween caramel that comes in the orange and black wrapper that nobody else eats. __________________ I'm so awesome I made your mom cry!

09-29-2003, 03:46 AM	#2870 (permalink)
Fly see the links to my music? Location: Beautiful British Columbia	'ol dan here passes his time by watching cats walk away with their tails in the air. and he likes it too. nothin' like a bit 'o pussy eh dan? __________________ BASTARD SterlingStudios

09-29-2003, 04:47 AM	#2871 (permalink)
bundy . Location: Tokyo	Flyman will be cheering on his beloved Canadian Rugby Team in this years Rugby World Cup, from his dunny. even when the wallabies are mauling them, the bokkas are donkey punching them and the kiwis are giving them a cricket score, Flyman will be shouting, cheering and wiping his arse for his big burly tree-chopping boys. __________________ Ohayo!!!

09-29-2003, 05:25 AM	#2872 (permalink)
Fremen With a mustache, the cool factor would be too much Location: left side of my couch, East Texas	bundy shaves his left armpit hair every other Thursday just to fuck with his sister. (figure that out!) __________________ Google

09-29-2003, 12:09 PM	#2873 (permalink)
uncle phil comfortably numb... Super Moderator Location: upstate	fre launders all of bundy's soiled sleeper jammies...for (you guessed it)...FREE... __________________ "We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done." - Robert S. McNamara ----------------------------------------- "We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches... We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles." - Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message" ----------------------------------------- never wrestle with a pig. you both get dirty; the pig likes it.

09-29-2003, 12:27 PM	#2874 (permalink)
Kewpie Dan powered by the souls of dead warriors Location: In the rain, dying	uncle phil really loves Will despite all his shenanigans __________________ I'm so awesome I made your mom cry!

09-29-2003, 11:57 PM	#2875 (permalink)
bundy . Location: Tokyo	Kewpie couldn´t decide if he wanted to be a Magpie or a Kiwi or a Kea... what a strange mixture of birds you have there. perhaps this is a fetish... __________________ Ohayo!!!