zharvey

I know this is a ridiculous question, but I am being completely serious here. This is an exercise in prowess: if you were to make it your ultimate goal, how would your plans for world domination (good or evil alike) come to fruition?

Please no erroneous posts!!

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"Forty-three species of parrot? Nipples for men?? SLUGS!! God created slugs?!? I mean, are we not in the hands of a complete lunatic? If I had had my way, we would have started with laser beams, 8 o'clock, Day 1." -Evil

ratbastid

This word "erroneous". I do not think it means what you think it means. Besides, this is Tilted Nonsense! EVERY post is erroneous!

I would take over the world by designing a Resignation Ray. I'd zap the public with it, and then no matter what dastardly deed I did, they'd shrug their shoulders and go, "Enh."

jwoody

I've got the cat, all I need now is a plan.

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Perry Como

I'd use Oprah as a shield.

maleficent

Jwoody's cat looks fierce...

I'm really too tired to take over the world... though it would be fun to just annihilate those that are deserving of annihilation.. and finally i could have some peace...

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Giant Hamburger

Mechanically separated chicken!

maleficent

errogenous posts would probably be better

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The_Jazz

I'd create a race of supersoldiers using the DNA of Elvis, Andre the Giant and Madonna.

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"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety." - B. Franklin
"There ought to be limits to freedom." - George W. Bush
"We have met the enemy and he is us." - Pogo

ratbastid

Wow.. The Material Hunk of Burning Brute Squad!

zharvey

ratbasid it seems that you are correct. I thought it could be used to mean anything that is frivolous...and I was wrong.

But I challenge you to beard-off. How say ye?

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"Forty-three species of parrot? Nipples for men?? SLUGS!! God created slugs?!? I mean, are we not in the hands of a complete lunatic? If I had had my way, we would have started with laser beams, 8 o'clock, Day 1." -Evil

fresnelly

The real trick is to be able to manage the world once you've taken it over. I've always wondered why evil maniacs don't just take over small, lush tropical islands, and stay there.

Anyways, my plan includes a dress code. It will be jeans with blank T-shirts. I figure I've already got the entire Western world in step, so the rest should be easy.

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Building an artificial intelligence that appreciates Mozart is easy. Building an A.I. that appreciates a theme restaurant is the real challenge - Kit Roebuck - Nine Planets Without Intelligent Life

Astrocloud

I'd create a virus that would only kill off the men-folk. That away all the remainin women-folk will have no choice but to make me their king. (That and I'll have the only antidote for my virus).

The_Jazz

Please note that's copyrighted. Violate it and you're first into the re-education camps where you'll be forced to dance, wrestle and eat peanut butter and bacon sandwiches.

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"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety." - B. Franklin
"There ought to be limits to freedom." - George W. Bush
"We have met the enemy and he is us." - Pogo

Poppinjay

I would first run for school board. Then build a coalition of supporters to gather steam for state office. One my network is in place, I'll be ready for a run at the senate. I'll give speeches that start with humurous self-deprecation and end with strong statements only weirdos wouldn't believe in. Such as, "well, my girth may tell you that I buy one too many pudding cups, but unlike my opponent I'm not going to let those folks down in Warshington tell you what you can and cannot buy at the grocery store!"

I'll be a good pick for VP in 2020. After the unfortunate demise of the president , I will then strenghten our relationship with a ecnomically depressed country full of nationalistic crazies. I don't think Germany will fall for that again, so I'll target Bosnia. Once I get them stirred up into a frenzy, they'll do all the crap work - deposing their leader, the killing, the mass burials etc.

Then I'll quietly pass on in my bunker with a nose full of coke and my hand down a hooker's pants.

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I think the Apocalypse is happening all around us. We go on eating desserts and watching TV. I know I do. I wish we were more capable of sustained passion and sustained resistance. We should be screaming and what we do is gossip. -Lydia Millet

CSflim

You're posting in the wrong section of the board if you really want to avoid nonsense posts. If you actually want some sort of semi-serious discussion of this, I suggest Politics, Philosophy or General Discussion instead of Nonsense.

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clavus

The plan has already begun. How? I have three words for you

Tilted
Forum
Project

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Ass, gas or grass. Nobody rides for free.

vermin

I would gain control of toilet paper companies and chocolate companies and bullet manufacturers and blackmail my way into power by threatening to cut off the supply, or worse, make a sub-par product.

Or better yet, take a couple hits from a bong and re-examine exactly WHY anyone would want to rule the whole world.

Then eat some cheese and take a nap.

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If puns were sausages, this would be the wurst.

Crack

I am not usually one to tempt fate, or cause a stir, but I want our cats to fight. With kitty boxing gloves of course! Granted it seems like your cat would be in a different weight class than mine, my cat has smarts and the unsinkable attitude brought on By 4 years of indoor life, and many afternoon snuggles...

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Crack, you and I are long overdue for a vicious bout of mansex.

~Halx

AquaFox

i would get a makeover to look like GWB, keep sending pretzels to him till he chokes, then step in and take his place, while holding him hostage... then i'll declare it illegal to be a democrat and force everyone to be my army and take over the world!!!




.... or i could just claim to have discovered a way to make infinite oil and chololate candy

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...AquaFox...

Fly

MASSIVE MARIJUANA PLANTATIONS!!!!!!!!

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BASTARD

SterlingStudios

grumpyolddude

Look deep into my eyes....