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Old 08-31-2009, 02:05 AM   #1 (permalink)
Misanthropic
 
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Location: Ohio! yay!
Hooch

I searched high and low across all the interwebs combined, and I found a few good recipes for making prison hooch.

Now... you might find yourself asking yourself, why would someone who is not in prison and who is well over 21 make prison wine? Well, I say unto thee, Why the shit not!?

If you are at all interested, the method I used is:

Take 1 backed of bread yeast, open packet, place into about a cup to a cup and a half of WARM water. Let it sit, do NOT stir. After about 5 minutes, add about 2-3 tablespoons of white sugar, LIGHTLY stir.

Grab 2 trash bags, medium size, put one into the other, add about 8-10 large cups of water, add 1 packed kool-aid of your choice, I used fruit punch. Add in 2 cans of fruit cocktail/mixed fruit in either syrup or water. Throw in about a cup and a half of sugar, you can use up to two cups if you want it to be super sweet.

By this point, about 5 more minutes, the yeast will start o bubble and foam. It is ready. Dump it in the bag with the rest of the crap. place a SMALL diameter tube of some sort into the top of the bags, and tape the holy hell out of it. Prop the bag up and somewhere out of the way and slightly cool and dark. I covered mine with a towel. No clue if that helps, but since I used white bags, I figured... what the hell. make sure the end of your tube that is in the bag is not in the liquid. This is the only way the the air can escape. If you you do not give it an air outlet, it will balloon up and explode. Wait 5-7 days. Do not fucking touch it!

If all goes well, I should have some prison hooch by September 4th (this Friday) If not, I'll just go out and buy some boone's farm and drink away my failures as a brewer.

said bag containing toxic waste


pipe system to let off air pressure. Yes, that is a hose from a hookah. Not mine though.
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Last edited by Crack; 09-01-2009 at 11:44 AM.. Reason: pictures added
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Old 08-31-2009, 08:39 AM   #2 (permalink)
Good to the last drop.
 
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Location: Oregon
You need to hide it from the warden in the toilet tank to appreciate the whole experience. It also adds a certain, je ne sais quoi.

I can't wait to hear what happens!!!
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She probably tastes like cheap beer and smells like a jockstrap.
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Old 08-31-2009, 10:39 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Location: New England
If your research missed the "Steve! Don't Eat It!" prison hooch entry on the blog The Sneeze, read it here. The man is inspiring.
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Old 08-31-2009, 02:32 PM   #4 (permalink)
Misanthropic
 
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Location: Ohio! yay!
I read that, I didn't want to used moldy bread, it added an element that I just wasn't quite ready to drink yet.
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Old 09-17-2009, 05:20 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Hey, how was the hooch?
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Old 09-17-2009, 11:03 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Location: Windiwana
my friends dad used to make stellar blueberry wine, pseudo-prison style.

but yeah, how did this turn out?
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Then they came for the communists and I did not speak out because I was not a communist.
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Then they came for me And there was no one left to speak out for me.
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Old 09-22-2009, 11:19 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Location: Windiwana
damn-it crack. i want results!
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First they came for the Jews and I did not speak out because I was not a Jew.
Then they came for the communists and I did not speak out because I was not a communist.
Then they came for the trade unionists and I did not speak out because I was not a trade unionist
Then they came for me And there was no one left to speak out for me.
-Pastor Martin Niemoller
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Old 09-22-2009, 12:33 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Location: Portland
apparently the hooch failed and Crack didn't survive =(
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Old 09-24-2009, 09:19 AM   #9 (permalink)
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Location: The "Canyon"
I sent Crack a PM. Inquiring minds want to know...
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Old 10-09-2009, 08:01 AM   #10 (permalink)
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C'mon, Crack, if you just threw it out, it's OK. But let us know, please?
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Old 10-09-2009, 01:29 PM   #11 (permalink)
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I think I saw in another topic that Crack was having internet connection issues.
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Old 10-14-2009, 05:22 AM   #12 (permalink)
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Location: Windiwana
it better be connection issues!

...evil bastard.
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First they came for the Jews and I did not speak out because I was not a Jew.
Then they came for the communists and I did not speak out because I was not a communist.
Then they came for the trade unionists and I did not speak out because I was not a trade unionist
Then they came for me And there was no one left to speak out for me.
-Pastor Martin Niemoller
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