Heard these flicks are coming up... - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

K-Wise · 11-18-2004, 06:04 PM

Found em on this site.

Doom
A science experiment on Mars goes awry and opens up a portal to hell, allowing evil minions to escape and wreak havoc everywhere.
Release Date: Aug 5, 2005

Seriously Dude, Where's My Car?
Too much reefer makes two boneheaded friends confused about the location of their vehicle … again.
Release Date: TBA 2004

Rocky VI
Sylvester Stallone returns for a sixth time as Rocky Balboa, a tough-as-nails Philadelphia boxing champ.
Release Date: TBA 2004

Rambo 4
Well, there's not much to report, other than the fact that Sly has been talking lately about bringing Rambo back to the big screen one last time, perhaps sending him to Afghanistan to lead a team looking for weapons of mass destruction.
Release Date: TBA 2006

The 40-Year-Old Virgin
The plot of this middle-age coming-of-age comedy has not been announced.
Release Date: TBA 2005

3001
This live-action comedy is about a regular Joe (Luke Wilson) who wakes up 1,000 years in the future and discovers that the world has become so stupidly oversimplified that he's the smartest man on the planet.
Release Date: TBA 2005

21 Jump Street
21 Jump Street was a 1980s television series that launched the career of Johnny Depp (and, to a much lesser extent, Richard Grieco, Holly Robinson, and Peter DeLuise).
Release Date: TBA 2005

The A-Team
Based on the early '80s TV show, the story follows a group of falsely convicted Vietnam War veterans who team up to form a mercenary group called The A-Team.
Release Date: TBA 2005/2006

Back to School
A hard-partying businessman (Cedric the Entertainer) enrolls in college to help his straightlaced son get through school.
Release Date: TBA 2005

Unleashed
Danny (Jet Li) has been raised to be a champion in illegal fight clubs by the evil Bart (Bob Hoskins), leaving him mentally undeveloped.
Release Date: TBA 2005

28 Weeks Later
The plot of this sequel to 28 Days Later hasn't been announced yet.
Release Date: TBA 2005/2006

The Alchemist
Laurence Fishburne will write, direct, and star in this story, set in Spain during the Inquisition.
Release Date: TBA 2004

Alien 5
Those pesky aliens Ripley encountered in space are now colonizing her home on Earth.
Release Date: TBA 2004

They got a whole bunch on that site. Dunno if this has been posted before though.

Asta!!

Kadath · 11-18-2004, 06:46 PM

Unleashed
Danny (Jet Li) has been raised to be a champion in illegal fight clubs by the evil Bart (Bob Hoskins), leaving him mentally undeveloped.
Release Date: TBA 2005

I've seen trailers for this. Jet Li is Hoskin's "dog,' trained in a Pavlovian way to kill on command. It looks really depressing(in the sense that it addresses the ugliness of human nature in the character of Hoskins), and like Jet Li might actually act, which is cool.

Suave · 11-19-2004, 11:42 AM

Prereviews (five star integer rating system):

Doom - will mirror Resident Evil in plot, character, and CGI development, but won't have Mila Jovovich [negative two stars]

Seriously Dude, Where's My Car? - I haven't seen the first, but this one is guaranteed to suck [negative three stars]

Rocky VI - Stallone is not a very good actor, he's getting old, and he was in one of the Spy Kids movies [negative five stars]

Rambo 4 - will possibly get back to the roots of bloody 80s action movies, but will still suck by "normal" standards [zero stars]

The 40 Year Old Virgin - Michael Moore's autobiography? Looks like it may have potential [two stars]

3001 - Luke Wilson is pretty awesome, and comedies with dumb people are normally pretty amusing [three stars]

21 Jump Street - hopefully they won't screw this up somehow, which they have a 47.265% chance of doing [three stars]

The A-Team - Mister T is funny to make fun of, but that's about it, and this movie is based on one of the worst shows in history. Luckily, this movie might be SO bad that it's unintentionally a laugh riot [two stars]

Back To School - I've seen enough of this kind of movie to know that it will suck. Cedric the Entertainer is amusing, but he picks some SHITTY roles [negative three stars]

Unleashed - Jet Li: awesome. Fighting: awesome. Dark films: awesome. [five stars]

28 Weeks Later - the name reminds me of 9 1/2 weeks, but this will have much less sex (unless it's zombie sex, which would be hilarious, but it won't have that) [ negative one star]

The Alchemist - Lawrence Fishbourne is an incredible film-type-dude, and with his consistent involvement in the important dimensions of this film, it should be a good one [five stars]

Alien 5 - I'm being naively optimistic here, but I'm hoping this will break the curse of the Alien movies getting progressively crappier after Aliens (although Alien Ressurection was really better than Alien 3, that was a fluke, and better than a giant steaming pile of crap isn't saying much) [four stars]

Redlemon · 11-19-2004, 12:17 PM

The sad thing is, I had to go back to the top of this thread to figure out if this was Entertainment or Humor. I mean,

Quote:

The 40-Year-Old Virgin
The plot of this middle-age coming-of-age comedy has not been announced.

...does anyone not know what the plot of this movie will be?

the_marq · 11-19-2004, 12:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by redlemon

The sad thing is, I had to go back to the top of this thread to figure out if this was Entertainment or Humor. I mean,

...does anyone not know what the plot of this movie will be?

Opening credits .... Rob Schenider tries to get laid ... fade to black, end credits.

Suave · 11-19-2004, 12:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by redlemon

The sad thing is, I had to go back to the top of this thread to figure out if this was Entertainment or Humor. I mean,

...does anyone not know what the plot of this movie will be?

Depends who does the movie. It could be approached in an immature or mature manner.

K-Wise · 11-19-2004, 01:01 PM

Theres way too many movies on that site for me to get through on one day. You should check it out. They're listed alphabetically of course.

Asta!!

tropple · 11-19-2004, 02:57 PM

Dear god in heaven.

Someone should come up with an reality action show where all of the hollywood producers and screenwriters are held captive on a speeding bus driven by Keanu Reeves while sytematically having bits of their frontal lobes sauteed by Anthony Hopkins.

Are there no more original ideas? Are we doomed to an endless cycle of thin plots and dismal sequels of sequels? Can't someone finally drive a stake in that retarded boxer's heart? How fucking old is the Rambo character now? 55? 60?

Shit. These things are worse than Hammer's kudzu-like vampire movies.

Coppertop · 11-19-2004, 03:00 PM

This is for real? wtf...

FngKestrel · 11-19-2004, 03:03 PM

Everything old is new again. The post-modernist mantra.

It's happening everywhere. Most anticipated games these couple of months? Sequels.

Halo 2, Half-life 2, Metroid Prime 2, Splinter Cell 3, Everquest 2.

Fremen · 11-19-2004, 08:59 PM

Speaking of Rob Schneider, Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo

K-Wise · 11-19-2004, 10:25 PM

^ Haha didn't see that one there. Do they have the review for that movie called "Santas <b>SLAY</b>??? Thats the single stupidest plot I've ever heard of. Goldberg is Santa for one. Yeah...I know...

Asta!!

djflish · 11-20-2004, 01:30 PM

The Rock has been cast in Doom, but not as the main character, he's being by Karl Urban.

Seething · 11-20-2004, 03:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by djflish

The Rock has been cast in Doom, but not as the main character, he's being by Karl Urban.

Karl Urban is a good choice for Doom. He plays well in dark roles. I think he may bring a bit more promise to the film, but if the writing is horrible (which it most likely be), I won't see it. I just hope Paul W.S. Anderson has NOTHING to do with the Doom movie.

11-18-2004, 06:04 PM	#1 (permalink)
K-Wise It's All About The Ass!! Location: In a pool of mayonnaise!!	Heard these flicks are coming up... Found em on this site. Doom A science experiment on Mars goes awry and opens up a portal to hell, allowing evil minions to escape and wreak havoc everywhere. Release Date: Aug 5, 2005 Seriously Dude, Where's My Car? Too much reefer makes two boneheaded friends confused about the location of their vehicle … again. Release Date: TBA 2004 Rocky VI Sylvester Stallone returns for a sixth time as Rocky Balboa, a tough-as-nails Philadelphia boxing champ. Release Date: TBA 2004 Rambo 4 Well, there's not much to report, other than the fact that Sly has been talking lately about bringing Rambo back to the big screen one last time, perhaps sending him to Afghanistan to lead a team looking for weapons of mass destruction. Release Date: TBA 2006 The 40-Year-Old Virgin The plot of this middle-age coming-of-age comedy has not been announced. Release Date: TBA 2005 3001 This live-action comedy is about a regular Joe (Luke Wilson) who wakes up 1,000 years in the future and discovers that the world has become so stupidly oversimplified that he's the smartest man on the planet. Release Date: TBA 2005 21 Jump Street 21 Jump Street was a 1980s television series that launched the career of Johnny Depp (and, to a much lesser extent, Richard Grieco, Holly Robinson, and Peter DeLuise). Release Date: TBA 2005 The A-Team Based on the early '80s TV show, the story follows a group of falsely convicted Vietnam War veterans who team up to form a mercenary group called The A-Team. Release Date: TBA 2005/2006 Back to School A hard-partying businessman (Cedric the Entertainer) enrolls in college to help his straightlaced son get through school. Release Date: TBA 2005 Unleashed Danny (Jet Li) has been raised to be a champion in illegal fight clubs by the evil Bart (Bob Hoskins), leaving him mentally undeveloped. Release Date: TBA 2005 28 Weeks Later The plot of this sequel to 28 Days Later hasn't been announced yet. Release Date: TBA 2005/2006 The Alchemist Laurence Fishburne will write, direct, and star in this story, set in Spain during the Inquisition. Release Date: TBA 2004 Alien 5 Those pesky aliens Ripley encountered in space are now colonizing her home on Earth. Release Date: TBA 2004 They got a whole bunch on that site. Dunno if this has been posted before though. Asta!! __________________ "I love music and it's my parents fault (closing statement)." - Me..quoting myself...from when I said that...On TFP..thats here...Tilted Forum Project *It ain't goodbye, it's see ya later! I'll miss you guys!* - Asta!!

11-18-2004, 06:46 PM	#2 (permalink)
Kadath Muffled Location: Camazotz	Unleashed Danny (Jet Li) has been raised to be a champion in illegal fight clubs by the evil Bart (Bob Hoskins), leaving him mentally undeveloped. Release Date: TBA 2005 I've seen trailers for this. Jet Li is Hoskin's "dog,' trained in a Pavlovian way to kill on command. It looks really depressing(in the sense that it addresses the ugliness of human nature in the character of Hoskins), and like Jet Li might actually act, which is cool. __________________ it's quiet in here

11-19-2004, 01:01 PM	#7 (permalink)
K-Wise It's All About The Ass!! Location: In a pool of mayonnaise!!	Theres way too many movies on that site for me to get through on one day. You should check it out. They're listed alphabetically of course. Asta!! __________________ "I love music and it's my parents fault (closing statement)." - Me..quoting myself...from when I said that...On TFP..thats here...Tilted Forum Project *It ain't goodbye, it's see ya later! I'll miss you guys!* - Asta!!

11-19-2004, 02:57 PM	#8 (permalink)
tropple Junkie	Dear god in heaven. Someone should come up with an reality action show where all of the hollywood producers and screenwriters are held captive on a speeding bus driven by Keanu Reeves while sytematically having bits of their frontal lobes sauteed by Anthony Hopkins. Are there no more original ideas? Are we doomed to an endless cycle of thin plots and dismal sequels of sequels? Can't someone finally drive a stake in that retarded boxer's heart? How fucking old is the Rambo character now? 55? 60? Shit. These things are worse than Hammer's kudzu-like vampire movies. __________________ +++++++++++Boom!

11-19-2004, 08:59 PM	#11 (permalink)
Fremen With a mustache, the cool factor would be too much Location: left side of my couch, East Texas	Speaking of Rob Schneider, Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo __________________ Google

11-19-2004, 11:42 AM	#3 (permalink)
Suave Twitterpated Location: My own little world (also Canada)	Prereviews (five star integer rating system): Doom - will mirror Resident Evil in plot, character, and CGI development, but won't have Mila Jovovich [negative two stars] Seriously Dude, Where's My Car? - I haven't seen the first, but this one is guaranteed to suck [negative three stars] Rocky VI - Stallone is not a very good actor, he's getting old, and he was in one of the Spy Kids movies [negative five stars] Rambo 4 - will possibly get back to the roots of bloody 80s action movies, but will still suck by "normal" standards [zero stars] The 40 Year Old Virgin - Michael Moore's autobiography? Looks like it may have potential [two stars] 3001 - Luke Wilson is pretty awesome, and comedies with dumb people are normally pretty amusing [three stars] 21 Jump Street - hopefully they won't screw this up somehow, which they have a 47.265% chance of doing [three stars] The A-Team - Mister T is funny to make fun of, but that's about it, and this movie is based on one of the worst shows in history. Luckily, this movie might be SO bad that it's unintentionally a laugh riot [two stars] Back To School - I've seen enough of this kind of movie to know that it will suck. Cedric the Entertainer is amusing, but he picks some SHITTY roles [negative three stars] Unleashed - Jet Li: awesome. Fighting: awesome. Dark films: awesome. [five stars] 28 Weeks Later - the name reminds me of 9 1/2 weeks, but this will have much less sex (unless it's zombie sex, which would be hilarious, but it won't have that) [ negative one star] The Alchemist - Lawrence Fishbourne is an incredible film-type-dude, and with his consistent involvement in the important dimensions of this film, it should be a good one [five stars] Alien 5 - I'm being naively optimistic here, but I'm hoping this will break the curse of the Alien movies getting progressively crappier after Aliens (although Alien Ressurection was really better than Alien 3, that was a fluke, and better than a giant steaming pile of crap isn't saying much) [four stars]

11-19-2004, 03:00 PM	#9 (permalink)
Coppertop Getting Medieval on your ass Location: 13th century Europe	This is for real? wtf...

11-19-2004, 03:03 PM	#10 (permalink)
FngKestrel Junkie	Everything old is new again. The post-modernist mantra. It's happening everywhere. Most anticipated games these couple of months? Sequels. Halo 2, Half-life 2, Metroid Prime 2, Splinter Cell 3, Everquest 2.

11-19-2004, 10:25 PM	#12 (permalink)
K-Wise It's All About The Ass!! Location: In a pool of mayonnaise!!	^ Haha didn't see that one there. Do they have the review for that movie called "Santas <b>SLAY</b>??? Thats the single stupidest plot I've ever heard of. Goldberg is Santa for one. Yeah...I know... Asta!! __________________ "I love music and it's my parents fault (closing statement)." - Me..quoting myself...from when I said that...On TFP..thats here...Tilted Forum Project *It ain't goodbye, it's see ya later! I'll miss you guys!* - Asta!!

11-20-2004, 01:30 PM	#13 (permalink)
djflish The Mighty Boosh Location: I mostly come out at night, mostly...	The Rock has been cast in Doom, but not as the main character, he's being by Karl Urban. __________________ Europes two great narcotics, Alcohol and Christianity. I know which one I prefer.