BoCo

I saw The Matrix: Reloaded when it came out last Wednesday, and my overall thoughts were that it sucked a boner, but the special effects were fucking awesome! I don't remember everything that happened because I was busy watching my girlie take sips from my Mr. Pibb all night and imagining what she lust look like wet and naked. Her ass is like a ripe melon, just firm enough to bounce a quarter off of, but soft emough to sink my teeth into--ooops! OK, where was I now? Oh yes: back to ruining The Matrix for you.

Anyway, here's all the important shit:

--Neo can fly like Superman
--There's a pointless sex scene between him and Trinity about 20 minutes into the movie
--Mr. Smith comes back, only he begins to copy his data into other people and clones himself 50 times over.
--There's a dope scene where Neo has to fight Mr. Smith, only more Smiths keep coming out of nowhere and he has to fight them all. It makes split-screen scenes from the past look pathetic when 50 of the same dude are fighting Neo all at the same time. One of the best shots is when Neo uses a pole to smack one of the Smiths like a damn baseball. It looked so realistic that I had to look away from the perky boobies sitting beside me for a moment.
--Neo almost dies at the end of the movie.
--He meets the dude who created the Matrix near the end
--It turns out the Matrix can't be perfected because of man's ability to make choices, which can't always be determined with computer programs
--Um..... Some black dude walks in on his girlfriend and nearly says "Where's my pussy?!" only to have to stop at about "pus" because kids are in the room
--Hmmm...what else? There's a bunch of fighting scenes!
--The best scene is on a highway, during a high-speed getaway. Oh my god, the special effects are so incredible in that scene!
--At the end of the movie, when Neo is laying on a table almost dead, you find out that there's gonna be a Part 3 to the movie
--Make sure you stay after the credits for some previews of Part 3

OK, I guess that's basically it. Like I said, the plot sucks and there's not really very much important dialog. And the rest of the movie is a bunch of lame fight scenes with great special effects. Hopefully I've ruined it somewhat for at least a few of you out there.

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spectre

Quit your bitching, the movie rocked!

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Kyp

Matrix Reloaded was one of the best movies I have ever seen. The movie kicked 30,000 different types of ass. Probably more than that.

You just didn't like it because you were too busy staring at the hot chick next to you to listen to what was going on.

Oh, and Neo didn't almost die. He just went into a coma, most likely from the shock of realizing that they were still in the matrix. Just my opinion, though. It's pretty obvious from the trailer for Revolutions that he's fine. :-P

There's a hell of a lot that you're missing from that. Try watching it again without looking at some chicks tits the whole time, maybe you'll understand it. Maybe you won't, though. Some people seem to think it sucks, but from everyone that I've talked to that didn't like it, they just didn't understand it, no matter how much they claim that they did.

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BoCo

It sucked.

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Realizm

Which theater did you go to?

Kyp

One thing that really seems to annoy me... the people that don't like the Reloaded seem to love spoiling it for everyone else. First Time Magazine did it, you just did, and many other people have. You don't like it, so you seem to love making sure no one else likes it by telling them everything that happens. Why? Why can't you let other people enjoy the movie, even though you didn't? Is it some crime to like a movie that you think sucked?

I'm not the only person who loves Reloaded. I know a whole lot of people that love it. In fact, I know no one in person who has seen it that didn't like it. You crazy people just expect something, don't get it, and automatically seem to hate it. It's your opinion, that's fine, just don't try and ruin the movie for everyone else. It's just flat out rude.

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BoCo

Chill, people. This lil' thread was only suppose to be a joke.

It says a whole lot about you that you're so easily offended that this thread about a movie I think sucks has made you mad.

Jesus-fucking-Christ!

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Cynthetiq

Neo could fly like superman in the first matrix movie... watch the last few seconds again and you'll see him launch himself straight up into the sky.

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Quadraton

I know this is a "spoiler" thread, but I'll say it anyway.

***MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD***

In terms of special effects, and action scenes, this movie kicked some major ass. Best parts:

1) near the end when Neo was flying through the city to save Trinity, and was draging everything behind him in a tornado. It was was funny as Hell, but extremely awesome at the same time.
2) the part where Morpheus slashes the Twins' SUV, and shoots the gas tank. It's just some sort of affliction I have with Samurai swords.
3) and my favourite one of all, the scene where Neo stops all the bullets in the mansion. "Ok, maybe you do have some skills."

I did, however, find that the action did have its faults. After about the 3rd Kung-Fu scene, the rest just began to blend together. How many times can you watch a scene that consists entirely of kick-punch-kick-twirl-pivot-kick, slow-camera-action, kick? I mean, you're Neo. Punch the guy through the brick wall, kick his head to the Moon, and move on.

In terms of story line...meh, it really wasn't the best I've seen. The problem I found was that the storyline relied heavily on action scenes, and when the action stopped, the so did the story.

Take, for example, the rave scene/Neo-Trinity love scene. It was awful. It was like that God-awful love scene in Star Wars II. It was just so long and pointless. I ended up snapping back to reality about 5 minutes into it, wondering when the scene was going to bloody end. We get it! They're partying before the big battle. Neo and Trinity love each other. We don't need 10 minutes to realize that.

Then there was the scene where they meet The Merovingian (the French speaking dude) in the swanky dining room in order to get the Keymaker. I've never seen a guy that could talk, philosiphize, and swear in French as much as this guy could, yet still not make a single point in his entire diatribe. You could have seriously replaced every word coming out of his mouth with the word "blah", and it would have had the exact same effect. In fact, you could have shortened his entire speach down to one sentence; "Sorry dude, I'm not giving you the Keymaker."

But it wasn't quite as bad as the scene with the Architect. They should have called that scene "Story Time with Dr. Snooze". Talk about long winded. At least with the dining room scene, you had something to look at besides countless TV screens all turned to the History Channel.

And yes, I did hear everything that was said, and yes I did understand it, and no, I don't care about the symbolism of it all. As far as I'm concerned, there are only two people that care about symbolism. Smart people who don't really know what they're talking about, and dumb people who try to pretend they're smart.

And finally, despite all the gloriously negative points I gave, I would definitely see this movie again in the theatres (maybe I'll bring a book and a flashlight for the rave scene next time ) The action and special effects more than make up for an otherwise overly convoluted, and unnecessarily long plot line. This one is just too awesome to miss. Can't wait for the third movie.

========================================

edit: Ok. this about the 5th time I've edited this. I keep coming back and realizing I missed something. In retrospect, I should have probably thought about what I was going to say before I posted it. Oh well.
edit: 9th edit. Still going strong.

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Kadath

Yeah, but there wasn't an extended shot of him in the "fist extended" Superman pose. And he was 500 miles away and got there in 5 minutes? Thus moving at 10,000 miles/hour. Mach 13. In the words of the Chris Rock knockoff, "Damn!"

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BoCo

Ditto! I forgot about that until you mentioned it, but that was incredible!

That's the same way I felt about it. My girlie and I and the people we were with were all getting pretty bored with the cookie-cutter fight scenes every 10 minutes. That's why I liked the highway scene so much because it was different from the standard Matrix fight scenes.

Word! Just like I said, the plot lacks a whole lot. The reason they spent so much time and money on the special effects was because they had to.

Worst fucking scene of the whole movie! I'm a guy who loves to look at naked people "doing it" and even I thought that was a needless part of the movie. Also, I really didn't need to see Neo's ass, and those holes in his spine made me want to puke!

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Quadraton

I was also kind of pissed off how they built up the War on Zion so much, then never show it actually happening. It was sort of like, "Oh yeah, and Zion was crushed by the robots the other day. Nearly everybody died....anyway, tell me more about what the Architect said".

It would have been nice had they at least shown the outcome of what took up about 80% of the storyline, rather than just make it an afterthought.

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Realizm

Pretty sure it wasn't Zion that got crushed.. it was the counter-attack against the machines that got crushed.

Kyp

I don't see anybody getting mad. You just did a horrible attempt at making a joke that nobody got.

And yes, Zion is still there. Neo explained at the end that they had 24 hours still. The ships that got destroyed were just defenses they had set up against the Machines, and Bane / Smith set off the EMP that disabled 5 ships.

I only agree with you people in one area, and one area alone. That's that the Zion dance scene went on too long. It should have been a bit shorter, but other than that, I thought the movie was perfect, and perfect is a very hard thing to achieve.

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BoCo

Everyone got it but you, dude.

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apetaster

I'm waiting until it comes out on Beta.

Loki

how neatly you reduce just about any analysis of any form of art.



Regarding the rave/neo love scene, well, it was a bit too long, but, i think the point of it was to show the new-age tribal nature of Zion (note that the place was referred to as a "temple" i think, and that they had to take thier shoes off to enter it) coupled with a rave within the temple. So anyway, i didnt have a problem with it (probably because i loved the background music)...

But yeah, i have no problems with the movie. The CG was a bit dodgy, and the editors could have done a better pruning job, but just remember that this is the 2nd in the series, and not the last. I'll wait till the last one comes out before passing any judgement.

Lasereth

I like how the people that are criticizing the movie don't really know why they didn't like it besides saying "the plot sucks." Even the critics that disliked Reloaded said the plot was excellent. If you didn't like the plot, then you wanted a cookie cutter action movie. Chances are, if you didn't like the plot, you simply didn't understand it. Don't say that it just "made no sense," because it truly does if you pay attention. I admit that seeing it twice helps out a lot with understanding the movie, but people shouldn't make conclusions on it just because they didn't understand it.

I posted the following in the other Reloaded threat; I think it sums up why some people disliked the movie quite nicely:

I have a very critical eye when it comes to CG, and the only part that bothered me was one of the tractor trailers during the "Trinity escape from agents with Keymaker while on motorcycle" scene. I can't really bitch about that though, it was purely for safety reasons.

I'm tired of people bitching about the movie simply because it wasn't what they expected. Grow up, learn to analyze movies instead of looking for pure entertainment value, and maybe you'll enjoy them more. Reloaded was an excellent movie and I'll argue that to the grave.

-Lasereth

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BoCo

Dude, I fully understand the 'plot' if that's what you want to call it. It's so damn simple even a small child could understand it. It's not like it's so complicated that you have to be a genius (which I am) to understand it; quite the contrary actually. The reason I didn't like it was because when the cookie cutter fight scenes weren't boring me to death, the plot was.

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Quadraton

If it helps, my English teachers never liked my opinions on symbolism either.

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Lasereth

Reloaded's plot simple? Did you even watch the movie? By your first comments at the top, apparently not. If you thought the plot was boring, that's because you want a movie filled with "cookie cutter" action scenes as you say. Go watch T3 and Chuck Norris movies like I said if you want a movie with an exciting plot according to you. There aren't many good sci-fi movies out there, much less one that has an excellent and intelligent plot. Reloaded is one of those few; calling its plot simple is ridiculous. Just because you didn't pay attention doesn't mean it's simple.

-Lasereth

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BoCo

I paid attention to both Matrix movies, and the plot is nothing a bored, pimple-faced, high school reject couldn't think up on a lonely Friday night. For the record, I didn't like the fight scenes because it was all the same crap, and I'm not the type of dude to ever get into fight movies at all. If you want a sci-fi movie with awesome special effects and a real plot that took years to create (not hours), then go re-watch Lord of the Rings.

The Matrix sucked, sucks, and will suck next time, too (but you can bet I'll go see it anyway).

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Lasereth

Lord of the Rings isn't sci-fi.

Lord of the Rings is a butchered fantasy movie that was made simply for pure entertainment value but turned out being better than expected. You're going to say that LOTR is a better movie than The Matrix? At least the Wachowski Brothers had their own plot.

You're saying that the plot is nothing but a bored, pimple-faced high school reject creation. Why are you using LOTR as an example of a good movie then? "Bad guy wants ring, ring must be destroyed." Wow, I can sum up the trilogy in one sentence. I have nothing against LOTR besides their complete butchered transformation into a movie, but comparing it to the Matrix is pathetic.

-Lasereth

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Quadraton

I'm going to have to go with simple plot on this one. Just because they had scenes where people babbled endlessly about philosophy, doesn't mean it's a suave and sophisticated plot line.

They had the Oracle, the Merovingian and the Architect all go on separate rants, when the meaning of what they were talking about could have always been boiled down to one simple thing.

The Oracle: You have no choice. You must go to the Central Core (or whatever it was called) to destroy the machines.

The Merovingian: You're here to get the Keymaker, and I'm not going to give him to you.

The Architect: Your design, Neo, is to reboot the Matrix, and start a new Zion. Choose you destiny.

I might lose a little bit in the translation, but the ideas are there. The only reason it percievably is a complicated plot line is because they say 10 words when they could have only said one.

edit: Spelling mistakes. It's after 1h00, et je suis fatigue.

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Lasereth

Isn't what you just explained a hell of a lot more complicated than most sci-fi movies, though? Just think about all of the great sci-fi movies out there. Not many have oustanding complicated plots. I can say that whether or not a movie's plot is simple or not does not determine it's quality or entertainment value; I'm just arguing that Reloaded's plot is just a bit more complex than most sci-fi movies.

-Lasereth

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Quadraton

Ah. There we go. We're breaching a miscommunication barrier here.

When people say 'complicated plot line', I perceive a plot line that is twisted and confusing, and one where you need to watch the movie again and again just to understand what's going on.

Yes, I agree. The plot is much better than many other science fiction movies out there, but it's still a simple plot to understand, provided you can get through the long diabtribes.

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truepac

ok i saw the movie on thursday and thought it was pretty good. there were a few things in the movie that i didnt get though.

1. if the oracle is supposedly part of a computer program how the fuck can she know whats gonna happen if we can alll supposedly "CHOOSE" what to do?
2. what is Mr. Smith now? ...some fuckin babies startin cryin in the theatre and that whole scene went to shit.
3. what was up wiht there being mulitiple neo's on the screen. i know supposedly all that shit had happened 6 times already but didnt Neo choose to save the bitch everytime? so why did it keep happening if he kept failing? Shouldnt the humans and the matrix be gone if he is the only one who can help rebuild the matrix?

aight well thats all I can think of for now but someone please help me out.

-Ever-

Lol, I'm with BoCo 99% of the way on this one. What a whack movie. Entertaining, but I found myself laughing more than I was amazed (by both plot and action combined... )

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Loki

Boco: I don't see how you can call the plot simple. Give me an example of a good movie which has a complicated plot.


A few things i liked about the Reloaded plot:

- The determinism undercurrent that runs throughout the movie, (i.e. our future actions are directly determined by our past actions)

- Morpheus, who was the rebel leader in the original, turns out to be a pawn of the system in Reloaded.

- The whole Human-Machine interdependency. i.e. in Zion when the counselor was talking to Neo, or the Architech speech, where he hints that humans are kinda unneccessary, which hitherto has never even been remotely suggested.

Kinda makes you wonder why they bother with the matrix at all =)


There are plenty more, but these are the ones that come to immediate mind.

Btw, falling asleep or tuning out during the long winded speeches doesnt mean that the plot is simple =)

rogue49

Then let me ruin the next movie for you
BTW, these are my own observations,
I didn't not see the preview for the 3rd yet,
or get these ideas from any other media.

If any of you were paying attention to all the "talk" & "boring parts"

Then you'd realize the movie was much deeper than most any movie.
The subtle revelations are profound.

Humanity is animal, see the passion.
The consul sees deeper than the others, and asks the question,
is man & machine not interconnected?
Neo is now not only the anomoly, the humanity in the machine,
but also the machine in reality.
One in the same.

Also is the "reality" you are seeing out of the Matrix real,
remember that Neo is controlling the machines on the outside now.
Can he really do this? Or is he and his allies really on the "outside".
Like Morpheous keeps saying "this is all wrong"

The Architect & the Oracle are allies had have set up an elaborate ploy to continually renew human race and keep them under control.
Including introducing "an acceptable" anomoly to control the chaos factor within the program.
He is the sixth Neo.
But he is also the One, not the One who has super-powers,
all of them have that, all of them dupe humanity into following the pattern, into believing in him.
But the ONE that breaks the pattern, the REALLY introduces "choice" into the Matrix.
And in turn setup a complex series of events, that introduce the "chaos" into the set series of events versus the Matrix's intent and design.

Mr. Smith is probably not the enemy that you think.
In being "destroyed" by Neo in the first movie,
you'd think he has just come back by the Matrix's design.
No, he has come back with the "virus" of Neo within him.
Pushing him to survive, with the desire to challenge Neo,
but yet spreading himself, adding to the "chaos" adding to the "virus" the Matrix hasn't accounted for.
This is also throwing off the planned series of events the Matrix has set off before.
Mr. Smith wasn't "supposed" to be there in the Hallway.
He wasn't supposed to kill the Keymaster.
And in turn the human he infected wasn't supposed to be there
to set off the sabatage to the initial attack by the humans against the drilling machine army.

Sometime by "losing" you have "won" something.
The sabatage has introduced more "chaos" into the plans,
throwing off the timing of events in the master program.
And now if you haven't scene, this has introduced "chaos" into the "reality" that you are seeing.
All the "chaos" and "mistiming" the has been introduced into "underlying" Matrix is starting to affect events in "reality".
Was that metal platform "supposed to" fall?
Were they suppose to lose that paticular captain and his ship.
No?
Was Trinity supposed to go into the Matrix, because she wouldn't have if they hadn't been killed.
This allowed Neo to make the choice for love to save her,
instead of the alternative one to save the human race,
even The Architect has to follow the program given him.
Neo has to push his powers further than ever disrupting the Matrix even more,
and then the need to save Trinity to merge with her is a new aspect to his powers.
How does the Matrix inside affect the outside? hmm?

The levels to this story are many.
The symbolism is significant.
The complexity is beyond most to fathom
The depth is profound.

The plot is excellent, the story superior.
And if you can't see this, then you are just watching the pretty FX too much,
to not see the through to the real developments.

Or maybe you were distracted by other things.

diergray

An example of a good movie with a complicated plot would be the Spanish Prisoner.

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BoCo

That's what I'm talking about right there. See, they knew the plot was so damn simplistic that they had to make the movie complicated and much longer than it needed to be through boring conversations that really didn't add anything extra to the movie. We've all seen movies where we were like, "Yup, that scene was a space filler right there." The entire scene with The Merovingian where he's telling about a program he put in a piece of cake, then we finally see it was designed to give that woman a really patheic orgasm (I'm assuming that's what that was, since the women I've been with reacted much differently when I gave them orgasms) was nothing but a time waster. The dude could have dropped his horrible accent and just said, "Fuck you, you can't have the Keymaker." Instead, they had him ramble on for 5 minutes or longer, all the while showing glimpses of his wife's cleavage (to keep the mens' dwindling attention in the audience) to make the same point.

The whole movie was just under 2 hours long, but if you tossed out all the scenes that added nothing to the movie, including the one I just mentioned, as well as the fuck/rave scene and many others, the movie would have only been about an hour long. Cut the lame fight scenes down to half their time and the movie goes to 45 minutes.

Speaking of the fight scenes, after the movie, my girlie looks at me and says, "You notice how like before a fight starts, you actually see it coming on about 2 minutes before it even happens?" I responded something like, "Yeah, and each fight scene looks exactly like the one that came before it!"

As far as the 'plot' of this movie being so transparent and artificial, if you're looking for anything with more of a plot, simply go rent any movie out there with Jim Carrey in it--that's just how bad it was....

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Lasereth

I'm not going to argue with you because you're still basing your argument with the fact that you didn't pay attention during the movie. Sorry that ya didn't like the movie, but those that did are those that like to think about movies instead of just being entertained. Maybe you'll like Revolutions better.

-Lasereth

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zf0enix

rogue49, thanks for the summary. You said it better than I could even begin to. I'm a little dim, but I loved the movie.

But, I have to agree with some of the non-essential extra bits of the movie. E.g., did we really need to see Neo's sex-face? Or his azz?

Other than that, I though it was great and can't wait for #3.

One question though, did Link make it out of the ship? I can't remember.

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Quadraton

Yeah, he made it out of the ship. I was almost expecting him to die the moment he told his wife (girlfriend?) "I promise I won't get killed. I promise I'm coming back". Somehow, I think it would have been too cliche if they had killed him.

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-Ever-

My opinion, simply stated like many others, is that the directors took 4 years to make this seemingly uncomplex sequel because they thought of an interesting plot, then made it as complex and confusing as possible to understand to maybe make up for any weak, boring parts within it...

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nine

BosieCosie - Sod the movie - what happened with the girlie when you got home

Actually don't answer - you sound like the kind of guy who would in all its detail

Loki

erm, you do realise that this is the second part of the series, right? if we cut the "boring filler" scenes and the merovingian plays a large role in revolutions, everyones gonna go "WTF! GHEY, STUPID PLOT DOESNT EXPLAIN WHAT THE MEROVINGIAN IS". (btw, that was a strong aphrodisiac, i think, not an orgasm inciter).

You keep alluding to the simplicity of the plot, yet you never demonstrate anything more than a rudimentary understanding of it. Curious. It doesnt matter anyway, to each thier own.

Kyp

To start, your comments on the LoTR series is simply an opinion. While I do agree that they are good movies, there are far more boring parts in the LoTR series so far than there are in The Matrix Reloaded. There was not one time in The Matrix Reloaded where I felt like it was getting boring, both times I saw it. While watching LoTRs I got incredibly bored many times.

The comment that what The Oracle, Merovingian and The Architect said could have been summed up in 1 sentance is also rather stupid. You're saying that you want just the main points, not the rest. They said quite a lot in there that has to do with the matrix, and helps you to understand everything a lot better. That, and wouldn't it be rather stupid if they introduced a new character, gave him 1 line which had a great deal to do with the movie, and that was it? If that did happen, you'd probably be whining about that as well. So you're saying you want a movie where bad guy is introduced, good guy finds hot chick, good guy fights bad guy, movie is over in 15 minutes. Sounds like a stupid TV show to me.

The Matrix Reloaded is a very well crafted movie. It's a shame that some people can't see that.

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Quadraton

Stupid how? Stupid in that you think I just didn't get it, or stupid in that you disagree, therefore it's wrong? I'm not looking for an answer or an explanation. It simply annoys me when you refer to my opinion as stupid, because it implies your opinion is more intelligent, therefore better.
One line can be quite a powerful thing if used correctly. Have you ever read Heart of Darkness by Joseph Conrad? The book was written in a style that could explain a wide range of emotions, and feelings, and still describe the world all in one single sentence.

I found that the Matrix, on the other hand, did the opposite. It took them two sentences to say one thing. It does not make a dialog more intelligent when a person continues making the same point for minutes on end. They could have said the exact same thing with half the dialog, and still preserve the content of the conversation. That was what I was getting at.

(And on a side note, why is it that I'm whining, but you're make a point?)

No, I didn't say that. You implied that.
Simply because I have some criticisms about the way the movie was presented, why am I suddenly oblivious to the fact that it was a great movie? Just because I don't share the same viewpoint as yourself, doesn't mean I didn't see the virtues of the movie.

And finally, I've stated my opinion, I've supported my opinion, and I'm done with my opinion. Accept it for what it is, or deny it. The choice is yours. It's not my job to convince you, and it's not your job to convince me.

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