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Old 09-04-2009, 01:15 PM   #1 (permalink)
... a sort of licensed troubleshooter.
 
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Sell an Unpopular Movie

Let's say you want people to watch a movie, but the movie is well known to be bad. The idea in this thread is to describe the movie in the best possible light, so as to convince people to see it. I'll start.

How would you like to see God shooting lightning out of his eyes chasing William Shatner around a planet, only to see God get blown up by a Klingon Bird of Prey? I thought you might. Check out Star Trek V.

Do you like Halle Barry? Me too. Do you like Halle Berry in a leather bra and panties and in stilettos? You're going to love Catwoman.

Imagine there were a movie written by Robert Zemeckis (Back to the future, Forest Gump), directed by Steven Spielberg (Jurassic Park, Saving Private Ryan), and scored by John Williams (Star Wars, Indiana Jones). I present to you 1941.

Have you read Frank Herbert's Dune? Like the best science fiction novel of all time? They made a movie about it and Patrick Stewart plays Gurney! You've gotta check it out.
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Old 09-04-2009, 01:32 PM   #2 (permalink)
Delicious
 
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Jennifer Lopez has a lesbian kiss in Gigli. The movie won like 5 awards. It also has Christopher Walken and Al Pacino in it.
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Old 09-04-2009, 01:40 PM   #3 (permalink)
Please touch this.
 
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The Core is an excellent movie because it doesn't try to be anything more than what it is: a dive into improbable fiction.
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Old 09-04-2009, 03:19 PM   #4 (permalink)
bad craziness
 
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Remember The Mask with Jim Carrey? How great was that? You should see the sequel! It's got Alan Cummings, Ben Stein, Bob Hoskins, and Kal Penn. It got WAY more nominations for awards too! (Son of the Mask)

Oh and remeber that hot chick from Saved by the Bell? She's naked in this! (Showgirls)
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Old 09-04-2009, 03:35 PM   #5 (permalink)
Delicious
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by m0rpheus View Post
Oh and remeber that hot chick from Saved by the Bell? She's naked in this! (Showgirls)

That's why I watched it...4 times...
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Old 09-04-2009, 04:31 PM   #6 (permalink)
Junkie
 
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Do you think surfing is cool? What about skydiving? Bank robberies? Check.
Also, Patrick Swayze, and Neo. Double check.
Point Break is the ultimate movie.
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Old 09-04-2009, 04:42 PM   #7 (permalink)
With a mustache, the cool factor would be too much
 
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Do you like mutant gorillas, big phat diamonds, deepest darkest Africa?
Then "Congo" is the movie for you!!1!!

And Will, David Lynch's Dune should not be on this list. Blasphemy, I tells ya!
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Old 09-04-2009, 04:48 PM   #8 (permalink)
Functionally Appropriate
 
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See Kate Hudson get hit in the head by a flying object!!
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Old 09-04-2009, 05:07 PM   #9 (permalink)
warrior bodhisattva
 
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Hey, did you know they made a Dukes of Hazzard movie?

Man, the General Lee was awesome. That Charger was done up real nice and sounded awesome.

And you've got to see Jessica Simpson. She was in great shape for the film.
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Old 09-04-2009, 05:08 PM   #10 (permalink)
Devoted
 
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I liked 1941. And Hudson Hawk.
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Old 09-04-2009, 05:59 PM   #11 (permalink)
Darth Papa
 
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Okay: Warrem Beatty AND Dustin Hoffman. And they're bad lounge singers! Hysterical! In a road movie in MOROCCO!! Politics! Intrigue! Bad singing!

It can't lose! We'll all be RICH!
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Old 09-06-2009, 09:39 PM   #12 (permalink)
Psycho
 
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the name BATMAN is reason enough to go check out a movie..

but add George Clooney, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Chris O'Donnell, Uma Thurman, Alicia Silverstone, and Vivica Fox in a summer blockbuster film with a 140 million dollar budget!!
Batman & Robin is a MUST SEE!!
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Old 09-07-2009, 06:11 AM   #13 (permalink)
Groovy Hipster Nerd
 
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If you want to see Jessica Biel nude then you will enjoy Powder blue.
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Old 09-15-2009, 05:44 AM   #14 (permalink)
Minion of the scaléd ones
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by biznatch View Post
Do you think surfing is cool? What about skydiving? Bank robberies? Check.
Also, Patrick Swayze, and Neo. Double check.
Point Break is the ultimate movie.
Point Break is a Fine movie! It has no place in this thread. And FBI agent will be calling on you later today.

---------- Post added at 09:44 AM ---------- Previous post was at 09:39 AM ----------

I can say with a totally straight face that Spiceworld was more than worth the price I paid to see it. Surprised? I certainly was. I sat down to watch in in an act of unmitigated self flagellation and discovered that Roger Moore does his very finest acting and that there is a sense of humor pervading the movie that, if juvenile, is also totally unexpected. While one does have to endure Spice Girls songs (a drawback), it is very much in the tradition of Early Beatles movies. Worth the time it takes to watch it. Once.
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Old 09-15-2009, 06:18 AM   #15 (permalink)
I Confess a Shiver
 
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Battlefield Earth, an unintentional comedy of epic proportions, will have you in stitches the whole time!
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Old 09-15-2009, 07:05 AM   #16 (permalink)
rolls good
 
Carla Gugino cast as a lady detective with an appetite for rough and kinky sex is a pretty hot reason to spend 2 hours watching Righteous Kill.

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Old 09-15-2009, 12:18 PM   #17 (permalink)
zomgomgomgomgomgomg
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jove View Post
If you want to see Jessica Biel nude then you will enjoy Powder blue.
I do and I did. Could have done without the crying, though.

Do you like adrenalin filled, action-packed movies? Do you hate it when they waste time away from the action to develop some sappy love story, or the part where the soft piano music plays and the main character looks remorseful or contemplative? Did you like Jason Stathem in Snatch and the Transporter(s)? Well then, you will LOVE Crank! So good they made two!
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