What Was the Movie Where They Skinned That Pig?
 

I've been a big fan of these really detailed movie reviews for parents where they list in EXCRUCIATING detail exactly what sexual, violent, or vulgar content might be contained in a movie; the effect of reading a bunch of these in a row can be quite a bit more shocking than watching the movies themselves.

so i've wanted to do this for a while: based solely on the description of said risque content, name the movie being described. maybe i'll start doing one of these every friday, depending how bored i am. all of these movies are currently out in theaters (in the US, anyway...)

i think these will be pretty easy, but the descriptions are so funny i couldn't resist.

1. a giant syringe (we don't see an injection), chases, fights, explosions, abductions, interrupted robberies; character and her dog get mugged but are fine. Canine sexual innuendo, toilet humor.

2. A steamy kiss; implied overnight liaison; hints of adultery -- a cuddle with a colleague; drinking; smoking; rare strong profanity. Not for tweens.

3. Bone-crushing fights, lethal gunplay; foot chases, car chases are breathlessly shot and could induce motion sickness in some; mild profanity. BOURNE ULTIMATUM -- ONODRIM

4. Character skateboards naked; characters drink and smoke -- including, at times, kids; pious Christians spoofed; mildly crude language; rare profanity; brief bedroom scene; two gay policemen kiss, enter a motel; robot suicide gag.

5. Drug humor; very strong profanity; drinking; smoking; nudity; body falls out of coffin; strong sexual innuendo; homophobic humor; gross toilet humor.

6. Explicit sexuality; nudity; strong profanity, sexual language; talk of an aid worker who sexually abused Third World children; a skinned pig cut in half at a market; drinking; smoking.

7. Highly explicit sexual language; drugs, drunkenness; squirm-inducing scene about menstrual blood; drawings of male sex organs; semi-explicit sexual situations -- mild compared with the language.

8. High-speed chases, crashes, people run over; gunplay; vicious dog chases kids; infected man, covered in slime, dies after a seizure; people jump to their deaths; Character stalked in a subway tunnel; verbal account of a man killing a pet; a muted kiss; Character seen briefly in translucent sleepwear; drinking; mild profanity.

9. Martial arts face-offs with fists, blades, sticks; high-speed chases; gunplay; leering but nonthreatening sexual innuendo (and a bit of sexism); ethnic, racial stereotypes spoofed; racial slurs referred to by first letters only; implied toplessness among dancers; briefly lewd but nonexplicit sexual situation; rare profanity.

10. Nongraphic boxing scenes with bloody noses, swollen eyes; one use of the F-word; mild sexual innuendo; drinking, smoking; verbal references to an abusive childhood, with a scar to show for it.

11. Sexual themes refer to teen longing, masturbation; subtler hints of cross-dressing, homosexuality; sounds of protagonist's mom and her new lover having sex; teens kiss steamily, drink, smoke; profanity.

I have no idea what any of these are, lol.

they can be hard if you haven't seen them.

hint: focus on specifics, like the one with the body coming out of the coffin or the aforementioned pig... if it stumps everyone i can post some names of movies out of order as a hint...

Well, I was and some of them are vaguely familiar, but I can't put my finger on them....

I'll guess on No. 10 - is it Million Dollar Baby?

fraid not, but it's a movie considered to be part of a trilogy of sorts with million dollar baby.

No. 3 sounds like it could be Bourne Ultimatum. The church my parents brought me to when I was younger had magazines about all the upcoming movies which listed all these things, but even more specifically. I would always read them as soon as we got there so I knew which movies I wanted to see based on the sexual content. :lol:

bingo! i tried to update the post to reflect this but it looks like it got nabbed by some spam filter. hopefully it'll come back up.

in the meantime, who can place this timeless gem?

***

Horror flick's vile premise -- young travelers abducted so rich folks can pay for the thrill of torturing and killing them -- makes one despair over the state of civilization. Bloodletting done with saws, blades, axes, dogs; film shows entrails, severed heads, headless corpses; a boy is shot dead; sexualized killing; much nudity; sexual situations; crude sexual slang; strong profanity; drug use; drinking, smoking. Too grotesque for anyone younger than 17.

***

i have to admit to despairing over the fate of civilization a bit when i saw "saw iii."

#4 is The Simpsons.

#2 is The Nanny Diaries.

#1 is Underdog.

#8 is The Invasion.

#9 is Rush Hour 3.

I have no clue what the others are.

hey, what's this about a pig skinnin??? :orly:

7. Superbad
10. War?

daaag. you got mad skilz. :)

What's left:
...and I have no idea.

11 is every teen movie ever, #10 is every rocky movie ever, and I think #6 is 2 days in Paris.

I offer Category 12:

Nekromantik 2, a nasty German flick where a guy with a huge hardon stabs himself repeatedly with a dagger ala seppuku while simultaneously squirting blood and ejaculating semen all over his heaving chest, room, camera, etc.

Oh, and then his girlfriend cuts off his head upon finding his body. She keeps it in a closet, puts cock rings on her new partners and decapitates them during sex so she can put the decaying head of her ex in place of the guys' real heads while riding their still-hard erection.

What a weird flick.

You should be able to edit the opening post without any problems now, if you haven't tried recently.

Is #5 clerks?

believe it or not, i've seen nekromantik the first one. (cant recall if i got around to the sequel.) i've also seen bloodsucking freaks and cannibal holocaust, which are all tied for first for the most revolting film i've ever witnessed. cannibal holocaust actually had good aspects to it though. nekromantik kinda just made me worry about germany. :P

thanks, i'll update the post tomorrow, i'm feeling lazy right now.

you guys are doing good with those. this isn't the first family filmgoer quiz i've posted and this is going lickety-split.

Even though I haven't seen it, #11 sounds like it could possibly be Mr. Woodcock. Maybe?

All my guesses were wrong.. didn't See BoR's post :)

The only one I know is Superbad, which is number 7.

I don't think I've seen any of those movies...