anna1985

Ok I notice that I always get bored of my bfs really fast. I have been in 4 serious realtionships that last pretty long but I always seem to get really bored of them. They make me mad easier and im not sexual with them anymore. I always end up breakin thier hearts and they are all still very attached to me! I dont know what my probelm is, I dont have problem with commintment just gettin bored with the person I guess... what do you guys think?

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denial, its cheaper then therapy
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Learn from your parent’s mistakes use birth control

Nancy

Perhaps you do have problem with commitment. Did you ever consider the fact that maybe you make a big deal of their individual annoying habbits on purpose which would give you an excuse to end the relationship?

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I have all the characteristics of a human being: blood, flesh, skin, hair; but not a single, clear, identifiable emotion, except for greed and disgust. Something horrible is happening inside of me and I don't know why. My nightly bloodlust has overflown into my days. I feel lethal, on the verge of frenzy.
I think my mask of sanity is about to slip.

jenjen

I don't think you need to worry about this if you're under 21 (I am guessing you are). The way I see it, these are the years for experimenting and finding out what you really like. Now if you still can't stick to someone when you're really old...like 30...then you need to worry I am guessing.

Kitenn Kaboodle

Really old like 30???? Hmmmpf

maleficent

:bops jenjen over the head with my cane:

30 isn't old -- hell, I'm 40 in a few months, that's not old.

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In my case, I haven't found that one person to spend the rest of my life with because I will not settle. The divorce rate is 60 percent in this country because too many people are either willing to settle for less than what they want, or because they don't think that something else will come along, or tehy are terrified of being alone.

Alone isn't bad, if you like yourself and your life.

You are better off than getting stuck in a relationship where you are miseable (talk to some o the folks here who are in less than satisfying relationships, you are better off cutting your losses early than getting children and lawyers involved)

When the right person comes along... You will know it in your heart and your head and it wont be a problem.

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Redgirl

when I read that I just knew a shit storm was to follow!

Yeah, you're probably too young to really worry about it. If you are getting bored with them, then they aren't the right one and you should move on. Give yourself some time to find that one that always sparks your interest.

Maybe you aren't giving the right kind of guy your attention? Find the one that is a great conversationalist- cuz all that physical shit fades and when you're old and gray (older than 40 even!!) you want someone you can still TALK to.

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Thought for the day: Men are like fine wine. They start out as grapes, and it's up to the women to stomp the crap out of them until they turn into something acceptable to have dinner with.

StickODynomite

How do you know this is absolutely true though..?

I can see how someone could get bored of another person, even if they do love them. If you're doing nothing but work and then sitting at home watching TV, then things will inevitably be boring. Right?

I love my SO, and if we do nothing (meaning, going no where, not doing anything new, or watching a movie at the theaters) for a LONG period of time, I get bored--not necessarily of HIM, but I am bored when he's around still. If that makes sense.. I'd think most people would get bored in that situation.

Not to mention if my SO is on the computer all day or watching TV all day, I get bored of him because nothing entertaining is going on and we're not exchanging any meaningful words.

I do love him, but sometimes things get boring when you're with someone for a while. It happens. You just have to add the excitement. Keep it interesting. I personally haven't been so bored that I would leave him. We talk about what's going on and we find a way to get through it.

And.. he's a wonderful conversationalist. We have everything in common and he always makes me laugh. I'm happy.. but I do get bored. I just think some women are more prone to getting "bored" than others, and i dont know why that would be.

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"The human mind is like a parachute, it works best when open."

maleficent

You just said it - he doesn't bore you -- the situation bores you..

That's a big difference.

If someone bores you -- and that's a someone bores you, you know, and it's not a relationship that you want to, or should stay in because long term, it's not going to work out.
I have met countless people over the decades who just bore me, they are always singing the same tune -- their job sucks, their life sucks, everything sucks, -- but don't do anything to change it... YAWN... It's not up to me to change them or constantly stimulate them... I do what I can - and if it's not there, it's not there...

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StickODynomite

Maleficent, I do understand what you're saying.
I guess I failed to mention that the two can be confused (being bored of him- being bored of the "situation"). When someone is under stress, that can happen.. I know this because It happened to me.

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"The human mind is like a parachute, it works best when open."

ShaniFaye

I was the same way....it took me until I was 35 to find a man that didnt bore me to tears after a few months....The only time dave and I are apart is when we are at work....its been over a year and boredom hasnt entered the scene one single time Dont worry.....when its the right guy you'll know it cause one day it will occur to you that "damn Im not bored!!"

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little_tippler

I think perhaps you enjoy the chase and the "honeymoon" period a lot more than you enjoy having to deal with the reality of a relationship. There is always a point where you start to see the other person for who they really are, and either you learn to adjust because you doo have feelings for them, or you give up. I think generally people break up so easily these days, it's sad. I'd say it's a result of mass consumer culture, where everything is disposable, even human relationships.

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Whether we write or speak or do but look
We are ever unapparent. What we are
Cannot be transfused into word or book.
Our soul from us is infinitely far.
However much we give our thoughts the will
To be our soul and gesture it abroad,
Our hearts are incommunicable still.
In what we show ourselves we are ignored.
The abyss from soul to soul cannot be bridged
By any skill of thought or trick of seeming.
Unto our very selves we are abridged
When we would utter to our thought our being.
We are our dreams of ourselves, souls by gleams,
And each to each other dreams of others' dreams.

Fernando Pessoa, 1918

Lizzy

Im having this same problem now also. Ive been with dude for over a year, and Im gettting so bored, and the sex is reallllllly starting to SUCK. I just suggest not doing what I did, that is asking the bf to move in. But its like Im lonely at first and want them there and after that they dont leave . In this case this person keeps telling me, "I'll stay as long as you want me." but at the same time I feel bad about kicking him out.