Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community  

Go Back   Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community > Chatter > Ladies Lounge


 
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 10-21-2003, 02:05 PM   #1 (permalink)
Insane
 
Location: Boone,NC
ex boyfreind and best freind


My last boyfreind (whom I dated for a little more than a year) and my best freind are dating now.
I've known this girl since I was four years old and we're all in college together now.
I don't care that he's dating again or anything because its been a long time since we broke up and I have another wonderful boyfreind , but it really bothers me to think of them together.
I don't really know how to deal with it. I'm just really uncomfortable with the thought.
Can the ladies of the lounge give me some advice? Right now I'm just kind of ignoring them and I dont think that that's really going to help any of us that much.
ally is offline  
Old 10-21-2003, 02:34 PM   #2 (permalink)
My future is coming on
 
lurkette's Avatar
 
Moderator Emeritus
Location: east of the sun and west of the moon
I think this is totally normal. It's weird to have two previously separate parts of your life collide like this. My only advice is to wait. It's weird and uncomfortable now, but over time, they'll either break up or their dating will just become a normal, accepted part of your life. Till then, my advice would be to just buck up and deal with it till it's not so weird.

If you're uncomfortable because of feelings for him, or because you feel somehow betrayed by your best friend, those are things that need to be dealt with. You might also try just talking to them - together and separately - and getting it out in the open that you're fine with them seeing each other but you're just feeling like things are a little awkward, and let them know that if you're weird it's just because you're dealing with your own discomfort with it.

My $.02, for what it's worth.
__________________
"If ten million people believe a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing."

- Anatole France
lurkette is offline  
Old 10-21-2003, 03:54 PM   #3 (permalink)
I'm baaaaack!
 
I can give you no advice because it would only lead to trouble. I once had a friend who would only date my ex's, and eventually this led to me beating the shit out of her, and not talking to her for years. I still hope she rots in hell.

But I am really a nice person. I swear.
__________________
You don't know from fun.
Rubyee is offline  
Old 10-21-2003, 07:12 PM   #4 (permalink)
My own person -- his by choice
 
Location: Lebell's arms
Quote:
It's weird to have two previously separate parts of your life collide like this. My only advice is to wait. It's weird and uncomfortable now, but over time, they'll either break up or their dating will just become a normal, accepted part of your life. Till then, my advice would be to just buck up and deal with it till it's not so weird.
Maybe go on double dates together so you can get to know each other as couples and you will have someone to "lean on" while adjusting. Also, take time with your girlfriend 1-on-1, just hanging out and being friends.
__________________
If you can go deeply into lovemaking, the ego disappears. That is the beauty of lovemaking, that it is another source of a glimpse of god

It's not about being perfect; it's about developing some skill at managing imperfection.
sexymama is offline  
Old 10-22-2003, 08:41 AM   #5 (permalink)
Insane
 
Location: Boone,NC
Quote:
Originally posted by sexymama
Maybe go on double dates together so you can get to know each other as couples and you will have someone to "lean on" while adjusting. Also, take time with your girlfriend 1-on-1, just hanging out and being friends.
I don't think that double dates would be a good idea. My ex-boyfreind hates my new bf because he got me. The ex tried for a while to win me back (although he dumped me!!) My freind is not so fond of him either. It's really an unfair situation for my bf all around.

I have a very different set of freinds at school. I came to this college first and they both followed me here, so I had already made my connections here. Most of my freinds are on my fencing team and we spend a lot of time together. My freind from home is very innocent and doesnt get a long with most of them.

I don't like having to seperate all of my activities in an us vs. them fashion, and now it seems more difficult to me since I'm not so comfortable with them being with each other.

grrrrr, i hate being confused!!!!!
ally is offline  
 

Tags
boyfreind, freind

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On



All times are GMT -8. The time now is 09:22 PM.

Tilted Forum Project

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0 PL2
© 2002-2012 Tilted Forum Project

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140 141 142 143 144 145 146 147 148 149 150 151 152 153 154 155 156 157 158 159 160 161 162 163 164 165 166 167 168 169 170 171 172 173 174 175 176 177 178 179 180 181 182 183 184 185 186 187 188 189 190 191 192 193 194 195 196 197 198 199 200 201 202 203 204 205 206 207 208 209 210 211 212 213 214 215 216 217 218 219 220 221 222 223 224 225 226 227 228 229 230 231 232 233 234 235 236 237 238 239 240 241 242 243 244 245 246 247 248 249 250 251 252 253 254 255 256 257 258 259 260 261 262 263 264 265 266 267 268 269 270 271 272 273 274 275 276 277 278 279 280 281 282 283 284 285 286 287 288 289 290 291 292 293 294 295 296 297 298 299 300 301 302 303 304 305 306 307 308 309 310 311 312 313 314 315 316 317 318 319 320 321 322 323 324 325 326 327 328 329 330 331 332 333 334 335 336 337 338 339 340 341 342 343 344 345 346 347 348 349 350 351 352 353 354 355 356 357 358 359 360