flagbomb

I understand the party and bar pickups.

But in random situations when you chat with a girl for a few minutes and leave (to act mysterious), how do you get their number to chill with them in the future?

Or do you just go for it upon the first conversation?

emphant

Always ask for their phone number. If they won't give it to you right away or make excuses, forget em and move on.

TM875

Okay, let's do a post New Year's update, shall we?

First, I took Plan9's advice: acted more mysterious, made eye contact (which is very hard, considering most people don't look you in the eye anymore), actually tried interesting conversation. It worked. Girl became interested.

However, I had to leave said party early. And me, being, well, me, never got around to asking her for her number. Which means, naturally, that my best friend got with her after my departure. No big deal, just one female out of many, but nonetheless, I fell like an idiot.

My point it this...your advice does work. I just need more resolve and more practice. I still have issues with a definite fear of rejection - my Resolution this year is to get rid of those. Will definately keep you posted.

And, as always, thanks for the advice.

bing bing

New years wrap up.

Acted too interested. The girl was an 8 and i gave too many compliments. I know i was in with a chance but acted a too needy. Was however a learning experience .

LiquidSquid

Alright...this is my first post, and I visit the boards very infrequently. Be that as it may, this thread has captured my attention. I'd just like to throw in the fact that I met the girl I'm with now without using any of the above rules, or hints, or whatever you want to call them. I met her thorough work, which just goes to show that bars aren't the only answer. I like to keep myself clean and neat, as anyone should, really, but I wouldn't say that I dress as sophisticatedly as is recommended here. I like to dress fairly casually, so I do. I just feel more comfortable. Of course my clothes are clean, appropriate (no track pants people), and don't clash or anything. But I certainly don't go to the trouble of matching my socks to my vest, or whatever I'm supposed to do. I don't go the gym or work out on anything approaching a regular basis. Which isn't to say I'm overweight, I like to keep active and keep myself busy, but I'm not built by any sense of the word. Rather skinny in fact. Turns out she's not that attracted to muscular guys. Yes, there are some girls like that out there. When I met her, I just treated her as I would anyone else. I thought of her as a friend, and didn't worry about the impression I was making or whether she was interested or not. I was just confident and acted the way I always do. Like myself. Eventually she decided she'd better give me her email. Then her phone number. Heck, why doesn't she invite me over for dinner? From there on it's all roses. What's the secret formula? There is none. Not every girl is going to like you or be interested in you. Yeah, you might stand a chance of getting into her pants if you put on this sort of elaborate ruse, as Plan9 suggests, but is it really worth your time and energy to get closer to someone who isn't actually interested in the real you? Do what makes you happy, what you feel comfortable with. That will make you more confident. If you are more confident, there's no need to act it out to convince others. And if there's one thing everyone can agree on, confidence is sexy. So: don't twist your head in a knot worrying, have patience and persistence, go with the flow, treat everyone with the same respect you'd like for yourself, and never discount a possibility. Usually the best prospects are staring you right in the face without you knowing it.

P.S. Oh, and sleep soundly knowing that there ARE girls out there who will love you because you're a warm, funny, intelligent guy, and not just sleep with you because you have nice abs and a Brad Pitt voice.

__________________
"There cannot be good living where there is not good drinking." - Benjamin Franklin

shaker

This is my first post, but i've been browsing the boards and especially this thread ( ) for some time now ... and there's some great advice here, which I actually wanted to use on new years eve... but i didn't need it... somehow...

Anyway, I've been at a friends party and then, only some minutes into the new year, i overheard a conversation between some friends and this pretty looking girl.
I kinda burst into that conversation, talked a little with her (only a few sentences, really), then sat down... talked some more (again, really short... and mostly rubbish, because i was somewhat drunk) and then found myself making out with her...

I can't really explain that... I think, that either both of us were somewhat drunk, or she just wanted me to shut up and saw only this one option...

We later made out two more times and i ended up getting her number...

Well, this is it... just comment, if you want...

Jim Kata

"but is it really worth your time and energy to get closer to someone who isn't actually interested in the real you?"

I think the advice is given to get closer to someone in the sack than in a relationship. I could be wrong but that is what I got from it. And if it is just to get your nut off than who really cares if its the real you, fake you, or whatever you.

jmad

Well, I jumped in this thread pretty late. I like your views Plan9, really breaking down the games people play into little pieces that make sense. Anyways, question for ya: I'm currently in college, and live in a dorm. I am the outgoing type, so I know everybody on the floor. As you could guess, there are a few smokin' hotties, but they all have long time boyfriends, so i've settled on becoming friends with them. This works out better than expected, because I can meet other girls, and just when they get interested, I go and just start talking and laughing with these gorgeous girls, none the wiser. Do you think they would get angry if I asked them to come out with me in order to hook up with other girls? There are a few girls I know that I do this with on a regular basis, but I've known them much longer than a few months. What are good guidelines to follow when you have to choose between friends and your own interests?

BooRadley

jmad:
1) Don't become friends with girls you want to fuck
2) Don't become friends with girls you want to fuck
3) See 1 & 2

impulse03

I also dont post here very often but I feel that i need to here.

LiquidSquid- i know exactly what you mean. I think that Plan9's advice is base more towards getting hookups than long lasting relationships.

Plan9- I've tried your advice and its gotten me plenty of hookups which are nice and all, but right now I'm looking for a real relationship and it just wont happen with any of the girls im meeting with your advice.

back to LS, what you have said about getting to know the girls, i feel is greatly important if you plan to be in a relationship.

blizzak

whatever....i'm still living by the guide plan 9
tried a few of your tactics on new years eve....tried to make myself seem not interested, tried to be the funny guy...and hell, I fell asleep with one of the girls at the party right next to me
it was kinda easy though, cause we all slept in the basement and there were like 25 people there

anyways, these are all well and good, but I have another issue on my hands. there's a girl that I know that I think likes me, and I could probably get something going with her if I wanted to
i'm kinda in the friend zone right now, but not really, because although I spend a lot of time with her, it's more objective time and NOT time where we have long conversations about anything and I agree with everything she says and all that stuff that leads to one-itis(unlike the stuff my friends do, haha)....I basically haven't shown any interest in her much, but I hear things about her and all
only problem is, if I screw things up with her, it will not be good for some other things because I will be seeing her around for the next 3 or so years a LOT
in fact, i'll be seeing her about 2 hours a day during the weekdays for the next 2 months (don't ask why, or pm me and i'll tell you and maybe you can help me more)
what should I do? basically right now I have been letting her figure things out for herself and if something happens, it happens
oh yeah, and she's an 8 or a 9 on the scale

__________________
Fueled by oxytocin!

Plan9Senior

hey dont get down on yourself. sometimes even I fuck up and fall into this trap. It happens to the best of us and only practice makes the technique perfected .

Plan9Senior

I love it! Good job. Do you remember using any of my shiz to score?

Plan9Senior

The info in here definately will get you laid, however; it will also open the door to a relationship if you want it. I am teaching you how to have an "edge up" and if some of you want that edge then I hope you can take some of what I have said and use it. I hope I dont come across as some guy who doesn't appreciate a great relationship. I just know that women are difficult and there are certain things that we can do as men that will give us a leg up on the competition, and believe me you are in a game whether you want to play it or not.

Plan9Senior

Oh hell yes take advantage of those female friends! I, myself, have a few girls that I go out with that are just friends. I am lucky because a few of these girls are strippers and are smokig hot. When I show up at clubs or bars with them, other girls can't help but look at me. They wonder what it is that I have that is making these hot girls hang out with me. Anytime I can have girl "friends" hang out, I always invite them and always appreciate them more then having my guy friends around. I have met far more women hanging out with girl "friends" than hanging with guy friends.

I am a little buzzed so I hope I am understanding your post correctly. I saw a responce from another person saying "dont be friends with somebody you wanna bang", so I hope I didn't totally misread your post.... because I am a FIRM advocate in the fact that you should NEVER become "friends" with women you want to fuck.

Plan9Senior

You are being vague, so PM me if you want to explain better to me. Ugh, I really shouldnt be replying while drunk.. I can't seem to comprehend the replies . I should go to bed . I met and hooked up with an 8 on my scale tonight and was quite impressed with how aggressive she was, and to tell you the truth I am very intrigued by this one. Anyhow, she wants to see me tomorrow and I am actually wanting to see her (her girlfriend cockblocked me while I was hooking up with her by her car... she said "we gotta go", so it kinda fucked up my time and I want to see more of her) so I need to get my beauty sleep. I will try to check this thread out tomorrow night (if I dont take her home).

inphaseneverb4

I am curious how old you are Plan9. I hope for my self esteem's sake that you are well into your late 20s or 30's even. Great advise, i have not a single disagreement.

shaker

Yeah, I guess I used something from all lessons, but I especially put that "Party Lesson" to use...

This stuff is really good and entertaining... great service.
I'm looking forward to more lessons...

Sleepyjack

aghh just a quick gripe here. If you're (a girl) going to a New Years Eve party, or even a party in general, with your boyfriend and all, remember to bring some of your friends!
Cause normally New Years is good for me and all, but this time, there where about 10 girls or so at this party and another 20 guys (only a smallish party of friends), but all the girls had boyfriends, there as well, so it was a crock really

And it was funny, cause we actually found some other girls down the street, after new years and all, and they claimed to be 17. Although we later found out they were 14 and after one of my friends kissed one of them. Damn that was funny. Glad i didn't try anything, but i was skeptical anyway, even with the beer googles
So a bit more selflessness woukld be good

i am also a little drunk at the moment, so i apologise in advance

Plan9Senior

27

But if you met me you would swear I act 18

ComradeJoe23

Wow, one of my first times at this forum, and this is the tread that I stumbled upon. I want to take you up on that challenge you mentioned earlier... I just wish I would have came here before the winter vacation for all the students! This is good timing for me because I was planning on going around tomorrow and make an attempt at "female hunting". Well after reading all 7 pages of this thread, I really am filled with confidence. Today is the 5th (its 2AM haha) I will go out later today and try this stuff at local shopping areas and I will post my experience. This is a pretty cool little deal you got goin on as far as everybody talkin and giving each other support. I kinda like it! Anyway we'll see how it works out, I'll keep you guys posted.

__________________
"To those about to rock, we salute you!"

inphaseneverb4

27? So there is hope for me then. Well assuming you were at some point a insecure AFC like me.

bing bing

Good work, the stories are always a good read.

ComradeJoe23

Hmm, today I went out and basically tried to find some chicks that were around. I managed to strike up some conversations with the not too hot ones, but I did wuss out on the ones I really wanted. I had the PERFECT oppourtunity and I BLEW IT TOTALLY today at the mall. The woman FOLLOWED ME after she saw me, walked right beside me, and then walked into a men's clothing store with me and I was too much of a pussy to say anything to her. She was a woman in her 20's, (I'm 18). I'm practically kicking my own ass because of this. Tomorrow I'm going out again, and the next day, and the next. I will get this down. So tomorrow I'll post my experience. BAHHH!!! I'm going to set a goal. Get rejected at least twice a day. That way ill have been rejected 60 times at the end of the month and I will be immune. Ok so like I said, I'm going to try and follow through with my plans and post what goes down.

__________________
"To those about to rock, we salute you!"

bobmsmythe

IMHO:
Most important thing: BE FUCKING INTERESTING. If you're a good looking dummy, you'll have some success, but not as much as an average-looking interesting person. Before arguing with me on this one, who got more-- Eddie Vedder or one of the Backstreet Boys? Another way to say the same thing: Interesting people are *much* more likely to want to hook up with other interesting people. Who would you rather have?

Bob

Plan9Senior

Your post made me smile . You have the perfect attitude about this. Keep trying and embrace the rejections. Remember... even if you look like Brad Pitt, you would still get rejections. Being able to handle them and keep your head up afterwards is what will seperate you from the normal AFC. Can't wait to hear more of your attempts.

Plan9Senior

Most of us are or go through the insecure AFC phase. I seem to have it happen to me after a breakup with a girl. Trying to get used to being back in the single scene takes some work to get used to, but thankfully I always put my ideas into effect and I get back into the swing of things quickly.

Plan9Senior

Ok, well I have been neglecting the thread lately but I have been getting a lot of PMs from people who apparantly are reading this (i wish you would all post here so others can learn as well) so at least I know my efforts in posting aren't wasted.

Well, in my life I have been hanging out with that girl I mentioned a few posts above. I gave her an 8 on my scale based on first impression. Now that I have been spending time with her, I have to move her up to a 9. This girl is phenomenal, even on my standards. I have pics of her and would love to share them with you but I would have to run that by her and I don't want her to know that I have a computer geek side to me just yet . Don't worry about your professor, I won't have one-itus with this one, however; she is definately somebody I will be spending more time with in the future (you would understand if you met her). Hope everybody is gaining confidence and putting forth an effort to be more aggressive. Keep the stories coming, I really enjoy reading them.

-p9

ComradeJoe23

Something funny happened yesterday. I was at my friends coffee shop, and these three girls walk in and they are checkin me out. So I go and sit at the table next to them and they turn around and I start flirting with the 3 of them. The one chick in the middle is the hottest, so of course I don't concentrate on her. They make jokes about staring at my crotch (apparently they noticed I went commando that day) and then the hot one said something about how she lies. I say I don't like liars and then she quickly changes her attitude and is like "No I'm kidding I only tell the truth." and the other chicks were like ya ur just saying that to get in his pants, ect ect. Anyway I decide to leave them while the conversation is good, and I go and plop down a paper, take out my pen, and go to the hottest chick and say "Hey, write your number down and we can continue this conversation later." When I said this, one of the other girls was like, "Dude, do you know how old she is?" And they told me she was 14. I was like holy crap! She wouldnt give me her number of course, and I wouldn't fuck a 14 year old anyway cause that is a sure ticket to jail. (I'm 18) So basically, that was kinda funny. Damn teens look so old now, it's all the hormones they are pumping into beef.

__________________
"To those about to rock, we salute you!"

Plan9Senior

Dude, you are classic. You are playing this perfect. I especially liked this:
G'damn I feel like I wanna hug you haha. You actually are reminding me of how I would have done it. Who cares if she was 14 or 50, the fact is you are practicing perfecting your game and you are doing a great job too! Keep it up, your story made my night

mfe

Just discovered this thread, lots of great stuff. Here's a story about something that happened to me recently. I've been hanging out with this one girl...she's about a 4, so I'm not at all interested in her sexually, but I didn't let that stop me from working on my game. She developed a crush on me...then, New Year's Eve, I met her hottie friend. When this girl saw how much her friend was into me, she couldn't help but compete...and I ended up taking her home. I never would have expected it, but I got an 8 by working a 4.

Driv300mph

Have a question for you guys...

Met this girl from tuttle, which is a town about an hour away from me. Really hot girl, nice too. After a week of not calling her (I was the one calling her usually) , she text me:

"Hey guy! I hope ur phone doesn't go off! But I have a question. What are you doing tomorrow?"

Text 2:

"HEEEY! Lol, well, why? it's cuz my friends and i are going 2 the movies and I want u 2 meet 1 of my friends! So write me if you get this, if not call me l8r"

I can't text, so I haven't responded yet, nor have I called, but I will. Question is, do you think she's trying to set me up with another girl? After all, it could just mean that she was talking to one of her friends about how she liked me, and that friend told her that she wanted to meet me to see what I was about.

I've only met the girl once for like an hour or two, and she's already told me that she's attracted to me and my personality, but I'm just curious if she didn't want to pursue, or maybe she likes another guy now.

Any ideas? Thanks all.

Mettler

Hahaha, unlikely, but you might be lucky and being set up for a threesome ^_^

ComradeJoe23

Hey, I got a number around lunch time today. It was from a gal that I knew in highschool. In highschool, she thought I was a total pansy, she even wrote in my yearbook that she was more of a man than I was. After many months of not seeing her, today I walk into a sandwich shop and see her behind the counter, and I put on an attitude of indifference towards her. She asks me a million questions about what I've been up to, and I answer them but keep the indifferent attitude towards her. I make fun of the fact that she is asian and therefore she can't see too well (slanty eyes) and then tell her that's why she's too slow at making my sandwich. After she hurries up and finishes it, she tells me its the best sandwich that I'll have ever eaten, and after I eat it, I say eh, it was ok. I then plop down one of the menus, take out my pen, and tell her to put down her number, which she grabs and writes down quickly for me. Maybe she has had a change of heart towards me? We shall see. Time to go and get more numbers! Muhahaha! Later

__________________
"To those about to rock, we salute you!"

shoe

ahaha.. i love your technique.

SAM821

ok update.... I just jumped into the sorority pool!!! I am in a fraternity at school (been in for 4 yrs), I am a senior and well since my major is civil engineering and i dont get out much (too much damn studying).

well... I finally was able to set up a schedule allowing me to stay out late on thursdays and interact with all the sorority girls before their respective meetings

So... lets see... for some odd reason i must be giving off a confidence vibe cause I talked to at least 4 or 5 sorority chicks (3 of them were in the same sorority). I gave one my email... I gave the other my number and the others i wasnt too interested in but I kept a very nice repretoire with. (i will see them plenty of other times)... so.. I was talking with one on the phone, and we will chill sometime in the near future... and the others we will wait to see...

The boss's daughter (if you read my thread) i decided to just be friends with... Its just too much to get involved in right now.. and i dont want a girlfriend

Another girl i was talking to before... we still talk, we will meet up eventually.. she is VERY nice and great personality... definitly girlfriend material... so i am taking my sweet old time with her... cause she's not a girl i would just mess around with and blow her off...

and of course... my ex... still involved in my life... we still talk, we still see each other... and we still are intimate with each other... I dont know how long i should continue this because too much emotions are involved (mine and hers)...

well... i REALLY hope i dont get into a pickle here... i mean, how many girls is too many girls to talk to at once? man... im giving myself a headache... and needless to say I MUST concentrate in school... but on a good note I am confident and it is showing

well thats where i am at right now....

ComradeJoe23

Hopefully you got THEIR emails and numbers too. If you just give your number to a chick, and she doesn't give hers to you, the chances are that you are goin' no where buddy. Thats why I just put out a paper and a pen and say "write your number down for me".

__________________
"To those about to rock, we salute you!"

phlox

this is good advice. i never call boys unless it's to call them back and verify plans. boys' numbers go in my circular files, usually. hehe.

Plan9Senior

Wow a female actually admitting I am pretty accurate in my postings . Who woulda thought it? Thanks!

SAM821

yea... i got there contact info too... one i got her email/IM and the other i got her phone number

besides... they asked for my info...