Galileo

Friends (if any),

I'm not a cruel person. Really, I'm not. Photos of Nazi concentration camps sicken me. When that tsunami in the Indian Ocean killed many thousands of people, I was horror-struck by the media video. Troube is, we are getting to the point where we need more tsunami, more eathquakes like the one recently in China. The trouble is, people are living about twice as long as they did a thousand years ago. And people on planet Earth aren't practicing enough birth control to offset it. Not even close. So we need more involuntary mass death. It sounds coldhearted, I know, but we have a quickly growing global population, and a finite amount of terra firma to place then all.

Truth is, I don't think tsunamis or earthquakes can do it alone. The earthquake in China killed many thousands. Sixty thousand, last I heard. That's incredible. But it's not enough. I think we're going to need a plague. The Aids virus showed promise but now I can see that it's not even close to being sufficiently large scale to do the job.

I've thought about a huge meteor striking the earth like the one that hit the Yucatan Penninsula millions of years ago. It threw so much dust into the atmosphere that it supposedly caused a climate change that killed the dinosaurs. There's one big problem with such a catastrophic event, as I see it; it would negatively effect me. I don't want that. There's about a hundred friends and family members that I don't want to see die, or even in discomfort, for that matter. And of course on the top of that list is yours truly, me. So the population-controlling event can't just be any old thing. In fact, it'd be better if it happened entirely outside the United States.

So allow me to sum up... Due to the fact that we are a global community with an out-of-control population growth, we need a mass death event or events. This catastrophic event should not cause me, Galileo Smith, any inconvienence and in fact it would be perferred if it were immediately beneficial to me in that the lines would be shorter at the bank and Diary Queen, and there'd be less traffic during rush hour.

And to think that there are people who have said that I'm stupid.

Your Chum,
Galileo Smith