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Old 06-01-2005, 08:14 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Location: Cali-for-nye-a
Car/Truck Testes

Well, I don't know if any other parts of the country are being afflicted with this epidemic, but it is spreading like wildfire here in California. It seems that certain people think it is really cool to hang a pair of balls from the back of their vehicle. No, not basketballs or baseballs, but testicles.

It's usually raised pickup trucks or more macho types of cars like old hot rods whose owners feel it necessary to affix the nuts, because lord knows anyone who doesn't drive those types of vehicles does not have balls.

Here is the first hit google gives you when you type in "car balls": http://www.nutsfortrucks.com/

I think these type of 'hey look at me' gimmicks and devices only serve to make the people who display this stuff look really stupid. In fact, if you display these, you are more displaying the fact that you are an asshole. If you have balls, why do you think it's necessary to display them? I think it just means that you don't have 'balls' and are just trying to con everyone. If you have 'balls' there is no need to display them, just let your actions exemplify that fact.

I apologize for what maybe is a trivial rant, but I spend 2 1/2 hours in a car all day and things start to wear on you
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Old 06-01-2005, 08:24 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Wow, they have that somewhere else too? I've only seen one truck here in NC with that, but when I did I was like "WTF... that's worse then putting a fin on your POS primer gray Camry."

Personally, if you feel the need to assert your badassness/masculinity/penis size through your car, then you're totally missing the point.
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Old 06-01-2005, 08:24 PM   #3 (permalink)
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I've never had the opportunity to see those, but I definitely know a few people who would probably proudly put those on their trucks. I think it's completely rediculous and yeah, anyone that has them would be an instant asshole in my book. What possible reason could a person have to justify putting those on their vehicle? I can see a lot of redneck hick type people at my school getting these, I hope they don't become too popular over here on the east coast.
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Old 06-02-2005, 12:05 AM   #4 (permalink)
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i would never put one on my vehicle... and i think their pretty retarted...

but i wish i had thought of the idea and was making money off it...
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Old 06-02-2005, 04:48 AM   #5 (permalink)
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That is just sick. Can you imagine driving behind someone with those with the kids in the car? "Mommy, what are those?" Not the way I want to explain things to a 4 year old.
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Old 06-02-2005, 05:38 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Balls alone just weren't tough enough for this guy....



...wait, is that a pink truck?
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Old 06-02-2005, 05:42 AM   #7 (permalink)
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As my mother would say, "Rude, crude, and socially unacceptable."

But that seems to be the growing trend now-a-days. I'm sure the parking lot outside the Jerry Springer show is full of plastic ballsacks.
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Old 06-02-2005, 05:43 AM   #8 (permalink)
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This has to be the dumbest thing I've seen in a long time. I don't know which is worse, the fact that someone created these, or the person who thinks they should buy them.
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Old 06-02-2005, 06:04 AM   #9 (permalink)
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I think that they are better than the "Calvin pissing on..." stickers, but only marginally. A guy I knew put a 14" dildo hanging off the back of his buddy's car, it was there for a couple of weeks before he noticed.
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Old 06-02-2005, 07:38 AM   #10 (permalink)
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I have seen these three or four times in the past couple of weeks. I hadn't seem them before on the road although I saw them advertised about two years ago. I hope they dont catch on anymore than they already have, but in the race to be the most obnoxious I guess this is just another way to be more of an asshole
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Old 06-02-2005, 07:57 AM   #11 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by matthew330
Balls alone just weren't tough enough for this guy....



...wait, is that a pink truck?
I think its Champagne. I dunno.

The testicle thing is kind of sick.
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Old 06-02-2005, 08:50 AM   #12 (permalink)
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To me the hanging nuts just says that there is a cock driving the truck
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Old 06-02-2005, 09:02 AM   #13 (permalink)
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Further proof that truck owners are compensating for something
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Old 06-02-2005, 09:17 AM   #14 (permalink)
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Pseudo-Friend has had nuts hanging off his car for 2 years....in PA..yea, he's dick...
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Old 06-02-2005, 09:51 AM   #15 (permalink)
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They even make a keychain version...

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Old 06-02-2005, 09:59 AM   #16 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ObieX
They even make a keychain version...
Now that's funny, if you consider yourself to be a ballbuster. If you met a woman in a bar, then saw that she had a pair balls hanging off of her keychain, would you take that risk?
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Old 06-02-2005, 11:19 AM   #17 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Redlemon
Now that's funny, if you consider yourself to be a ballbuster. If you met a woman in a bar, then saw that she had a pair balls hanging off of her keychain, would you take that risk?
That reminds me of an old Huster cartoon where two bull-dykes are decorating their X-mas tree... with ripped-off balls.
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Old 06-02-2005, 11:39 AM   #18 (permalink)
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Yeah I've heard of these for several years now.

I think they're stupid and gross.
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Old 06-02-2005, 07:27 PM   #19 (permalink)
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Like the old joke goes--that's different from a porcupine. A porcupine's pricks are on the OUTside.

But I know what I'm getting my brother-in-law for Christmas now.
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Old 06-02-2005, 07:31 PM   #20 (permalink)
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I guess one can revel in the fact
that these idiots are wasting their money to look stupid.
Call it stupid tax. And they've paid up.

*shudders, waiting to see what the next trend brings*
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Old 06-02-2005, 07:46 PM   #21 (permalink)
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I almost miss the "Ain't Skeered" fad from a couple of years ago.
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Old 06-02-2005, 07:59 PM   #22 (permalink)
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IMO - No different to me than lowering a vehicle, putting an "In Loving Memory" of, having a over watt stereo, dangly crap hanging from the rear view mirror, limo shaded windows, under vehicle lighting, white-out brake lights (or shaded ones), or any of the many things seen on the road these days. All are a small sample of what the person inside foolishly spends their hard earned money on. Its not for me, but who am I to tell a person what to have for a personal goal. Atleast these "balls" don't really remove safety from the vehicle.
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Old 06-03-2005, 07:55 PM   #23 (permalink)
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That's old hat. People used to put cow testicles in sacks and did that.
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Old 06-04-2005, 10:30 AM   #24 (permalink)
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Hee hee... personally if you're going to spend *so* much money on a carbon fiber hood/custom paint/custom bodywork/lowering/soundsystem etc on a POS Honda Civic, why not save your money and buy A NICE CAR, or, better yet, use the money to go to college and then be able to afford something that is really sporty- a high end Mercedes, BMW, or Lexus? Or what about a Ferrari?

I've ALWAYS wanted to rent a Ferrari for a Saturday night and drive down the big crusing strip here in Asheville. Maybe challenge some ricers to a drag race?
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Old 06-04-2005, 10:43 AM   #25 (permalink)
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That is by far the most bizarre thing I have seen in a while. I can't imagine why someone would think that was a good idea. But I know what's going on the car of the next couple to get married around here...

The next big thing: Maybe next instead of the bullethole decals they could make decals of a nice puckered anus, so you could tell right away who's an asshole.
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Old 06-04-2005, 11:05 AM   #26 (permalink)
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I saw a set of balls on a car a while back in Indiana... on an Impala with an old, old man behind the wheel. So wrong on so many levels.
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Old 06-04-2005, 12:57 PM   #27 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sage
Hee hee... personally if you're going to spend *so* much money on a carbon fiber hood/custom paint/custom bodywork/lowering/soundsystem etc on a POS Honda Civic, why not save your money and buy A NICE CAR, or, better yet, use the money to go to college and then be able to afford something that is really sporty- a high end Mercedes, BMW, or Lexus? Or what about a Ferrari?

I've ALWAYS wanted to rent a Ferrari for a Saturday night and drive down the big crusing strip here in Asheville. Maybe challenge some ricers to a drag race?
Careful. A lot of those ricers would embarras some Ferraris in a drag race.

Just don't pick on any with a gutted interior and an odd whirring sound under the hood.
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Old 06-04-2005, 01:45 PM   #28 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sage
Hee hee... personally if you're going to spend *so* much money on a carbon fiber hood/custom paint/custom bodywork/lowering/soundsystem etc on a POS Honda Civic, why not save your money and buy A NICE CAR, or, better yet, use the money to go to college and then be able to afford something that is really sporty- a high end Mercedes, BMW, or Lexus? Or what about a Ferrari?

I've ALWAYS wanted to rent a Ferrari for a Saturday night and drive down the big crusing strip here in Asheville. Maybe challenge some ricers to a drag race?
Car modification isn't necessarily something done by "poor" people that can't afford nicer cars. It's a hobby like anything else.

And furthermore, if someone puts a lot of money into a car, even a Honda Civic, the car can be quite impressive on the race track. Not everyone that mods a Civic limits their efforts to fart pipes and decals.. some people actually turn the cars into impressive vehicles, both internally and externally.

Regarding the car balls.. Seems like a stupid trend to me, and I am not sure what would motivate someone to actually put them on their vehicle. I remember they used to have the "Grandma In Trunk" yellow signs, which were often humorous and creative, and later had garfield tails, that hung out of the trunk... But this particular trend seems both tasteless and pointless.

If I did see someone with one of these car balls attached, I'd really like to talk to them about their motives behind using them though. I think that would be a neat, and potentially enlightening, discussion.
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Old 06-05-2005, 06:17 AM   #29 (permalink)
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Envision driving your mother to church, or rolling in a prominent position in a funeral procession.

Decorum and taste.... concepts lost in this generation.
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Old 06-05-2005, 07:30 AM   #30 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Redlemon
Now that's funny, if you consider yourself to be a ballbuster. If you met a woman in a bar, then saw that she had a pair balls hanging off of her keychain, would you take that risk?
I could see Mal with a set on her keychain right next to her keychain vibrator....
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Old 06-05-2005, 07:32 AM   #31 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lurkette
That is by far the most bizarre thing I have seen in a while. I can't imagine why someone would think that was a good idea. But I know what's going on the car of the next couple to get married around here...

The next big thing: Maybe next instead of the bullethole decals they could make decals of a nice puckered anus, so you could tell right away who's an asshole.
HAHAHA That's a great idea... I want to make some of those and then sureptitiously stick them on vehicles belonging to assholes...
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