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Old 08-12-2004, 02:53 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Sharing with Washington Drivers

So ms. juju and I took in an evening on the Spirit of Puget Sound Dinner Train last night. If you live or visit the Seattle area, it is highly recommended. If it weren't for the incessant yapping of the other woman at our table, it would have been an even more enjoyable occasion. Nonetheless, ms. juju and I had a nice time. The train wanders through towns and has some nice views, travels over a 1911 wood trestle, and stops lots of cars in its path (at approved crossings, only, as far as I know.)

This particular run of the train had a magician wandering around doing tricks at each table. I had downed two glasses of ice water and a good portion of my Merlot just before he started on our row of tables, so I waited as I really enjoy magic up close. By the time he had passed our table, I was squirming in my seat and ready for relief. I headed for the micro rest room.

The rest room is a tiny affair, likely just 6' x 6', with a foot-pedal style toilet, a sink big enough to wash one hand, and a window with a wood blind on it. The blind was hinged to open, but had magnetic catches, presumably to keep it closed. Looking out the blind, I realized that the view would be nice for seated users of this room. Standing as I was, I could see possibly 100 feet to one side of the train, but no more.

As I began my relief, the train began to slow. From my angle, I could see that we were slowly approaching a train crossing. Not a T type of crossing, but more of an X crossing, with the train passing the road at a very minor angle. I could not see out all too well, as the blind was firmly in place. I did notice, however, that we had completely passed the road we were crossing, so I had no worries. It was at this point that the train jerked quite violently. As I did not want to lose my aim, I grabbed the handle installed for this purpose. The jerk of the train cause the blind to lose it's magnetic grip and fly open. I knew that we had passed the crossing, so I had no worries. The train began moving again.

It was at this moment that I realized the train was now going backwards.

Suddenly I saw the road, the flashing crossing lights, and the line of cars waiting for the train to stop fiddling around. I only saw the hood of one car, but calculated that there likely would be quite a few of them as we had been moving very slowly. The amazing part is, my bladder was so full that I could not stop the flow.

So there I was, unveiled to possibly 50 people from chest to knee, unable to stop the flow, and peeing like a racehorse.

I imagined the scene from the front car : window with diner, window with diner, window with guy peeing, window with diner. I could not reach to close the blind as trains at this speed are simply far from graceful. By the time I had completed my duty and could use my other hand, the view had returned to serene trees and farmlands. I washed my hand. Then I washed the other hand.

I left the blind open for the next hapless chap. Good luck, fella.
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Old 08-12-2004, 03:01 PM   #2 (permalink)
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I've been wanting to take the dinner train since I moved here last year. Maybe sometime soon
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Old 08-12-2004, 03:10 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Funny story. Take some comfort that its hard to see into windows in the daylight hours. I have always wanted to do the dinner train as well, after your story though, a little less
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Old 08-12-2004, 03:11 PM   #4 (permalink)
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After your description of what the guy in the front of the line must've seen, I can't stop laughing.
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Old 08-12-2004, 04:29 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Originally posted by MrSelfDestruct
After your description of what the guy in the front of the line must've seen, I can't stop laughing.
Ditto! Brought tears to my eyes!

Thanks for the laugh
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Old 08-13-2004, 07:11 AM   #6 (permalink)
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HAHAHAH! Now I need to go pee!!! Thanks for the laugh Juju! Pants-wettingly funny!
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