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Old 11-12-2003, 02:30 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Location: Pa, USA
So you have a physical flaw.. Do you deal with it or get corrective surgery?

Here's the scenario. It may be true in your case. It may be completely made up. It could be a little of both.

Anyway, you have a physical flaw. It isn't a health risk, but you may consider it as an eyesore. It is something that makes you "different," but doesn't threaten your health or life.

You think of your own flaw, but let's assume that it is fixable via surgery, and you can afford the surgery. You have the flaw and the funds.

Do you get the surgery performed so you can look "normal," or do you live with your flaw and make it a good thing?

Those aren't the only two options, and if you have other/better results please post them.

I have come to realize that people have flaws (myself definitely included), whether it be phyiscal or personality. Both are fixable (in this case), but I wanted to see what you all thought in regards to physical flaws and whether you would like to have yours fixed, or if you'd rather live with the body you were given at birth and make the best of your situation.

Again, there is no set or correct answer. I am very interested to see what everyone has to say though.

In recent years there seems to be a huge focus on physical traits and having the "ideal" body, and I am also curious about how much that carries over to our personal lives.

So, given the scenario above, what would you do?

Lastly, as a possible second question.. Are you "forgiving" when viewing others or do you point out their flaws and criticize them?
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Old 11-12-2003, 02:49 PM   #2 (permalink)
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I have flaws, nothing I am embarassed by, but getting them fixed might make life a bit easier. Let me explain: I have a mole on the side of my neck. It is very difficult to shave there with a ravor so I have to use an electric on it....just in that spot. It isn't huge or gangly, but I could just as easily have it removed. I also have a crooked nose that I earned in a fight several years ago. That's what I get for sticking up for an old lady I suppose. It isn't outrageously crooked and it gives my face character, so why change it?

I am very forgiving of other people's flaws. Sometimes, however, you see something that just makes you ask yourself why they wouldn't get something done to it. Perhaps it would have made their lives just that much easier by having it fixed.
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Old 11-12-2003, 03:09 PM   #3 (permalink)
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i think if i have enough time and money i would fix one of my physical flaws..i mean..is not a big deal but fixing it would feel much better..
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Old 11-12-2003, 03:22 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Hmm, kind of a Catch 22 for me.

If I don't get it fixed, let's say it is something that other people notice and smirk about, then I live with people looking at me twice all my life, and not because of something positive.

If I do get it fixed, then the surgeries become addictive and I want to get every little flaw, real or imagainary, fixed, and turn out to look a lot like Joan Rivers.

I would probably get it fixed, but that is because I don't have the money to even dream of ever getting that done in real life. It is easy for me to imagine that I would get it fixed if I had the moolah.
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Old 11-12-2003, 03:22 PM   #5 (permalink)
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You mean like if I had a big hairy mole on my forehead? I'd go get that thing cut off, isn't that expensive to take care of.

I guess it depends on how extreme the remedy is, if I didn't like my nose I wouldn't think it was worth having some plastic surgeon break it to make it look better. But if say I had big marks on my face from some disease, I think they can fix that quite handily without you needing to recover for a few months.
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Old 11-12-2003, 03:36 PM   #6 (permalink)
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I think it depends on how visible it was, or how different it made me feel. I've got small teeth - many of them are actually baby teeth - and I've always been super sensitive about my smile. But hell if I'm paying $7000+ for orthodontics and implants! And ever since I decided that my smile is fine the way it is, I've gotten tons of complements on it, small teeth or not.

I guess if I had a birthmark or a scar or something on my face that was really distracting and made me feel super self-conscious, I'd probably get it taken care of, though. If it's easily fixable and will make me more self-confident, why not? I think there's a difference between "fixing" things that aren't aesthetically perfect but aren't really hindrances, and taking care of something that causes you serious embarassment or self-consciousness.
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Old 11-12-2003, 04:33 PM   #7 (permalink)
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There are a few things that I wouldn't mind having "fixed", I'm not sure if I will or not though.
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Old 11-12-2003, 04:41 PM   #8 (permalink)
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I guess it would depend on how self-conscious I was about it. If it was something I was sure people always noticed, I'd have it fixed for sure.
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Old 11-12-2003, 04:52 PM   #9 (permalink)
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I guess it would depend on how much of an eye-sore this "flaw" would be. If it was something that was usually covered up by clothes, I might not.

But if I had the money to get it fixed, I would probably get it done.
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Old 11-12-2003, 05:03 PM   #10 (permalink)
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I had my teeth "fixed".

When I was younger I lost one of my front teeth; not the ones at the very front, but just beside my canine. Initially I had a "crown" (that was fixed by a metal pin inserted into the root). All well and good for a few years, but the dentist did a botch job, using a round pin that let the tooth swivel. Eventually it fell out.

After that I had to go for a denture. Yes, I kid you not. At 21 years of age I had a false tooth! A real falsey... just like the ones your granny had. Ok so far.

Eventually though my other front teeth began to suffer. I wash them twice a day, but I suspect I have faulty genes (haha) and my teeth tend to have very thin enamel. Over time I needed more and more fillings in these (mostly at the back), but I lived in a country where amalgam was still used; hence the fillings affected the actual colour of the teeth.

This used to bug my wife who kept on telling me my teeth looked crap. They did, but I wanted to avoid getting a full-scale bridge & combined crown across my whole front four teeth.

Eventually however, I relented and got this done a few months ago. Sitting in a dentists chair as he drills away your front teeth down to little "shark-like" triangles is not a pleasant experience, let me tell you. After a week wearing a temporary plastic cast I had my new porcelian "caps" fitted. After a few issues (my teeth didn't close properly at first and they needed a little modification) I'm now the proud owner of a perfect set of front knashers.

I opted for a slightly lighter colour, as my natural teeth colour is not that bright. The dentist gave me a mouth guard to use with teeth whitener for my lower jaw. Over a few weeks the colours matched (though I couldn't really tell any difference to begin with).

My wife now calls me Hollywood. As in "Hollywood smile". I pretend to be annoyed, but it secretly pleases me.

Would I do it again? I don't know. I didn't really do it for me, but because my wife really hated the way my smile looked. I'm making my original teeth sound terrible and my wife sound shallow, but it wasn't as bad as it seems.

Mr Mephisto

PS - I can post some horrible "before and after" pics if you really want! LOL

Last edited by Mephisto2; 11-12-2003 at 05:05 PM..
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Old 11-12-2003, 05:25 PM   #11 (permalink)
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As always, it depends. I've got some tooth problems I wouldn't mind getting fixed, and if I thought I could afford it I'd be at the dentist right now. But then my hair is rapidly leaving my head for parts south and I really don't mind that as much. If I was outrageously wealthy I might get a full head of hair again, but then again I might not. I only mind it when I realize I'm pretty much stuck with four hair styles: The skullet, the Socrates, Mr. Clean, or a crewcut. I usually stick with the crewcut or the Mr. Clean. I have glasses and wouldn't mind getting Lasik so I wasn't dependent on corrective eyewear. Contacts are great but also a pain in the ass to put in/take out/maintain.

NaFun
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Old 11-12-2003, 05:48 PM   #12 (permalink)
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I have a bone that sticks out in the middle of my chest. It makes all my tshirts fall around my front really weird, it also makes it look like I have an impressive set of man-tits. Also, during sex, it tends to slam into the area right between my girlfriends breasts. She seems to be ok with it, but it does leave a bruise. I would get it fixed.
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Old 11-12-2003, 06:07 PM   #13 (permalink)
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I support body modification.
Calling something a "flaw" is a distinction that isn't necessary and it begs a lot of cultural and esthetic questions.

In brief, I think it's fine when people decide to change the way they look for whatever reason.
Some reasons are more interesting than others.
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Old 11-12-2003, 06:40 PM   #14 (permalink)
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I am a flaw.
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Old 11-12-2003, 08:02 PM   #15 (permalink)
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Iunnno my pinky looks like it was pretty badly broken but it never has been. It works decent but it locks up sometime which causes problems when playing bass. I wouldnt mind getting it straighted and fixed up but im not sure how well it would really work after having really being broken and operated on
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Old 11-12-2003, 09:10 PM   #16 (permalink)
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To be honest, I really don't know. I have several large scars on my chest and back. I'm very self-conscious about them, but at the same time, they have become a part of me. If I had the opportunity to get rid of them, I just don't know if I would. If I was asked this question a few years ago, my answer would have been "yes," but now, I just don't know if I would.
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Old 11-12-2003, 10:44 PM   #17 (permalink)
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I have messed up teeth (not too horrible, but not close to straight).

I don't and have never wanted braces.
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Old 11-12-2003, 10:52 PM   #18 (permalink)
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no never

i like me for me to change my body whould make me in to someone else
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Old 11-12-2003, 11:32 PM   #19 (permalink)
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Ok some of the stuff wrong with me I had to get fixed. When I was born I was born with my feet backwards....well kinda had to get surgery so I could at least walk...I could get surgery to make them more straight but I would end up with way more problems down the road. I've had plastic surgery done to my upper lip to fix a ugly scar on it from when I wiped my motorcycle as a small kid.
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Old 11-13-2003, 12:19 AM   #20 (permalink)
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I have a fucked up ribcage and a slightly twisted back to go along with it. I could have got it fixed (which would have involved the doctors breaking my ribs, fun stuff), but I opted not to.

If it doesn't directly affect my health (which it doesn't), why should I get it "fixed"? Sure, it may look pretty strange but I couldn't really care less.
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Old 11-13-2003, 12:28 AM   #21 (permalink)
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i would definately say that i would not choose surgery... if someone thinks your hideous with it and that you should get rid of it.. then they dont deserve your friendship... or love
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Old 11-13-2003, 12:35 AM   #22 (permalink)
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Re: So you have a physical flaw.. Do you deal with it or get corrective surgery?

Quote:
Originally posted by Grondar
...
You think of your own flaw, but let's assume that it is fixable via surgery, and you can afford the surgery. You have the flaw and the funds.

Do you get the surgery performed so you can look "normal,"
absolutely.

not for anyone else or society or whatever.

just me.

yeah, vain. so what? :shrug:

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Old 11-13-2003, 07:18 AM   #23 (permalink)
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If it's something you can't get rid of naturally, say by exercise - if you have the means, the process of removal isn't life-threatening, and you can single it out from other "fixable" flaws (meaning you don't get this done and then think, "now I can get such-and-such taken care of), and most importantly, if it will make you feel better about yourself, then I see no reason not to get it done.

But you know, my aunt just had plastic surgery - apparently she had the skin around her eyes tightened or something to make herself look younger. I don't feel good about that. I thought she looked fine beforehand - I don't feel like people should use plastic surgery to beat the clock. But maybe I'll feel different when I'm her age. I guess I didn't see her eyes or wrinkles as a "flaw." It really all depends on what the flaw is. It'll be a different story in each situation.
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Old 11-13-2003, 07:38 AM   #24 (permalink)
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I would say that it totally depends on the severity of the flaw and how much it affects your life.

Over here if you have a really bad disfigurement and you tell the doctor that it is ruining your life you can get it fixed by the national health service so it doesn't cost you anything. Therefore people are always going to the doctors and saying that their lives are a mess because of a mole or a small chest etc.

I dont think these people would always have their flaws fixed if they had to pay for them themselves.

Generally if it makes you feel better about yourself or improves your life why not get it fixed. But it should be done for your self not for any one else.
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Old 11-13-2003, 08:33 AM   #25 (permalink)
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My father's side of the family is famous for its nose. It's a great big one, and not particularly attractive. But I'd never consider getting it fixed; it's my nose, and in a way it also identifies me as a member of my family.

If I was actually seriously deformed, though, I'd probably consider getting that fixed. But only if it was preventing me from comfortably existing in society.
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Old 11-13-2003, 08:37 AM   #26 (permalink)
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part of the 10 rules of Being Human....

You will receive a body.

accept it.

no invasive surgery at all that isn't life threatening is ever needed. vanity can kill.
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Old 11-13-2003, 08:40 AM   #27 (permalink)
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I think my teeth are bad, yet people tell me that they're fine. Since I had my wisdom teeth out, one impacted tooth removed from my sinus, and a tumor romoved from my gum, I don't think that improving the alignment of my teeth issuch a big deal.

For some reason, the word "liposuction" passes through my mind occasionally, but when that happens, I get off my ass and go to the gym and put away the junk food. I know I'll get rid of my gut eventually, and I'd rather do it naturally than through surgery.
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Old 11-13-2003, 09:13 AM   #28 (permalink)
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What's a flaw?

Breasts too small?

Bald head?

Scarring acne?

I say fix whatever you lose sleep over, and put it behind you. I worried about my stupid teeth for years, and I waited twenty years to do something about it, and now I'm surprised at myself for waiting so long
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Old 11-13-2003, 09:25 AM   #29 (permalink)
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well i had braces but that was mainly because I didn't have to pay for them and my dad's a dentist so theirs that pressure to have a good smile(my teeth were pretty bad ,basically I had mismatched sets). i would definetly have reconstructive surgery if disfigured but i don't think i'd get a nose job or any other modification to what my genetics didn't do.
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Old 11-13-2003, 12:26 PM   #30 (permalink)
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Why not?
I'm considering getting lasik

This is a flaw with my eyes...I'm getting them fixed.
I do too much activities that glasses get in the way to do it well
Yet I need them for my job, but changing into contacts is burdensome.

Swimming.
Biking.
Dancing
Karate.

Even just the slight vanity of wanting to look your best whenever.

This is about a quality of life thing...these are the choices you make.
Sure there are risks...but there are many risks you take in life.
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Old 11-13-2003, 12:37 PM   #31 (permalink)
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Who told you about it ?
Your not looking at it now are you ?
I think that I would get it removed just so I could blend in, as I seem to stick out too much as it is.
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Old 11-13-2003, 12:40 PM   #32 (permalink)
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I want a total face transplant
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Old 11-13-2003, 02:06 PM   #33 (permalink)
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No.

I have a cleft lip. My palate is intact, so no speech impediment. I do, however, have scar tissue on my upper lip. I <i>could</i> have this taken care of, for the most part, as techniques have improved somewhat from the early sixties, when I had my first surgery. I tend not to think about it, though. Sometimes I actually do forget that I even have it...until some mental genius refers to me as a "harelip". Real nice. I, also, often get those that treat me as a mental deficient, as if the two are somehow connected, until they actually learn that I do have a somewhat intelligent brain in this head. More intelligent than these types of people, I can guarantee you that.

But, no, I don't think that I will ever have it "repaired". I spent my childhood (the worst possible time that I could) with it. I survived it. I have a lovely wife, and a wonderful family. I surround myself with friends that are intelligent enough to look past that type of nonsense...and I am happy. I am happy with who and what I am. And for those that can't see past it...then, to hell with 'em. I don't need that in my life. Make sense?
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Old 11-13-2003, 02:12 PM   #34 (permalink)
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If you are "fixing" something to make yourself feel better then I am all for it, however, if you are doing it soley to please others then I am against it. I agree that Vanity can be a deadly sin, but there is a fine like between vanity and taking pride in your appearance.
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