Heaven Is for Real! - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

Baraka_Guru · 11-23-2010, 11:36 AM

And so is St. John the Baptist!

YouTube - 4yr Old Boy Claims Heaven Is For Real!

dlish · 11-23-2010, 02:36 PM

hey, and jesus had blue eyes of course!

the bullshitometer senses this is all about selling books than sharing a true story.

Baraka_Guru · 11-23-2010, 02:52 PM

Here's a funny little bit the Toronto Star posted about the interview.

Quote:

Heaven is real. Fox News just proved it
Published On Fri Nov 19 2010

Cathal Kelly Staff Reporter

What’s heaven like?

Grampy Joe is there. So’s John the Baptist! They’re playing pinochle together!

In a wonderful bit of guileless reporting, Fox News did a strangely straight-faced interview this week with Colton Burpo, a boy who claims that, while under sedation during an emergency appendectomy when he was 4, he visited heaven.

Colton, now 11, is now sharing this vital information with the sort of people who see angels in chicken salad. He’s written a book that will be shelved under “non-fiction” south of the Mason-Dixon Line.

What sort of proof is Colton offering? He’s offering an out-of-body experience.

“Well, I saw my dad in a little room (bored pause) talking to God. And then I saw my mom in another room talking on the phone, talking to one of her friends,” Colton says.

Fox host and former Miss America Gretchen Carlson, doing her best Mike Wallace impression, hits Colton’s father, Todd, hard with a probing question.

“And Todd, there’s no way he would’ve known about that, right?”

“No, while those events were happening, he was in surgery under anesthesia. When he starts describing where we were at and what we were doing, I was stunned.”

Rooms. Talking. Phones. It’s pretty compelling evidence. Most fathers would have preferred if Colton had correctly predicted the Super Bowl winners for the next 20 years, but Todd has a low bar for “stunning.”

But what about heaven? What’s it like there?

First off, Todd’s grandfather, Pop, dead these last 30 years, is there. So, Pop told Colton where the bag of gold was buried or something like that, right?

“He can recognize pictures of Pop as a young man, talks about the time I spent with him as a child,” Todd says. “It’s incredible.”

Er.

Let’s get off Pop for a bit. Let’s get on to God. What’s God like, Colton? Apparently, he passed up a great basketball career to mind the metaphysical completeness of all known and unknown matter.

“Yeah,” Colton says. “He can actually fit the entire world into his hands.”

At this point, even Gretchen Carlson seems like she’s beginning to have doubts.

“Wow,” she says, after an embarrassed pause. “What about Jesus?”

“Well, Jesus, he had a rough but kind face, sea-blue eyes and a smile that lit up the heavens,” Colton says, which coincidentally sounds a lot like Jesus’s Match.com profile.

It’s also reassuring to know that Jesus is a Boston Celtics fan.

It gets weirder.

“And what about old people? They’re not up in heaven, right?”

“Nope,” says Colton. “Just young adults.”

At this point in the video, Fox is running a screen crawl under Colton that reads, “Met John the Baptist.”

Guys, this kid met God. It’s like meeting George Clooney and telling people, “Guess who I just met! George Clooney’s personal assistant!”

So, to sum up: Heaven. It’s a little like a nightclub, so dress young. God’s there. Keep an eye on him or he will accidentally crush you. Jesus is there, too. He’s a real dreamboat.

John the Baptist? Cheats at cards and headless. Pop said so.

Heaven is real. Fox News just proved it - thestar.com

ZombieSquirrel · 11-23-2010, 03:26 PM

I wouldn't have pegged Jesus as a Celtics Fan.

Charlatan · 11-23-2010, 04:18 PM

Wow! He really does have the whole world in his hands.

SirLance · 11-23-2010, 06:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ZombieSquirrel

I wouldn't have pegged Jesus as a Celtics Fan.

Well, if anybody needs salvation, it's the Celtics....

dlish · 11-24-2010, 02:57 AM

I digress. Its not the Celtics that need Gods touch....theyve been doing ok the last 2 or 3 years.

I wonder if he can resurrect the Vancouver Grizzlies

Fly · 11-25-2010, 07:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dlish

I wonder if he can resurrect the Vancouver Grizzlies

hahahhahhhaha.....awesome.

if anyone can......it's gotta be him.

11-23-2010, 02:36 PM	#2 (permalink)
dlish Currently sour but formerly Dlishs Super Moderator Location: Australia/UAE	hey, and jesus had blue eyes of course! the bullshitometer senses this is all about selling books than sharing a true story. __________________ An injustice anywhere, is an injustice everywhere I always sign my facebook comments with ()()===========(}. Does that make me gay? - Filthy

11-23-2010, 04:18 PM	#5 (permalink)
Charlatan Getting it. Super Moderator Location: Lion City	Wow! He really does have the whole world in his hands. __________________ "My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars." - Old Man Luedecke

11-24-2010, 02:57 AM	#7 (permalink)
dlish Currently sour but formerly Dlishs Super Moderator Location: Australia/UAE	I digress. Its not the Celtics that need Gods touch....theyve been doing ok the last 2 or 3 years. I wonder if he can resurrect the Vancouver Grizzlies __________________ An injustice anywhere, is an injustice everywhere I always sign my facebook comments with ()()===========(}. Does that make me gay? - Filthy