I'VE NEVER SEEN A STRAIGHT BANANA
Waite
You may have seen some funny things in your time
But there's one thing you've not seen, I'd like to bet.
Would you like to know just what you have been missing?
I'll tell you in the chorus but not yet.
Now I've got you puzzled, so I'll tell you what I mean.
The thing that's in my mind, I must confess, I haven't seen.
I have never, never, never, never, I've never seen a straight banana.
I guess I must admit
That I have searched quite a bit.
They're even curved when they are served in my banana split.
I have seen them by the car-load on the Delaware & Lacawana
But have you ever?
No, I've never
I've never seen a straight banana.
I recall when I was in Alaska
I saw the sun at twelve-o'clock at night.
I've seen the waterfalls at old Niagara
I can vouch it is a most impressive sight.
But I'd like to see one certain thing
But if it's not to be,
I'd like to meet somebody else
Who saw what I can't see.
I've never, never, never, never seen a straight banana.
Although the things I hate,
Hundreds I have ate.
But I've never yet seen one banana that was straight.
I have traveled far to find one.
I've been to Chili and Havana.
But I've never, never, never, never seen a straight banana.
I've never, never, never, I have never seen a straight banana.
Once I chanced to see
A real life murder mystery
The jury found the prisoner guilty in the first degree.
All at once we heard the prisoner
Holler out, "This is the truth, your honor,
I've never, never never, never
Never, never, never, never
I've never seen a straight banana.
__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
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"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
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never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.
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