JadziaDax

Let me give you people a little story, and you tell me...

Our characters: Michelle and Bob. Bob is a young, good looking man. Michelle is just a couple of years younger than Bob.

Michelle and Bob know each other for some time, live in the same community, have many of the same friends. They start talking one day. Michelle invites Bob over to spend more time together, but away from their friends (you know how it can be around friends).

So, here they are alone. Bob starts kissing Michelle. The kissing is nice. Kissing is ok. Kissing leads to some fondlings. He's touching her breasts under her shirt... he lifts her shirt... She's getting a bit nervous at this point. He starts to put his hands down her pants, she pulls his hands away. The kissing continues.

They go from a sitting up position to lying down... still kissing. Bob's on top of Michelle at this point. But the kissing is nice. Bob then pulls down her pants (she's wearing sweatpants so it's not so difficult to do). He uses his body weight to keep her from stopping him... He holds her hands above her head with one hand, pulls his own pants down with the other... and you can guess the rest...

Oh, when she tried to scream, he shoved a pillow over her face.

Not rape? She asked for it? She deserved it? That's what some of you would say.

Yes, there was dialog through these acts, she told him "No" as he put his hand down her pants the first time. She told him "No" as he pulled down her pants. She screamed "No" as he violated her. She was a virgin.

Some people would think that this isn't rape because she "egged him on". She's had to live with this her entire life. She didn't want to be near men. There are even times now (this is many years later) that when she is with a man, these images come back to haunt her and she'll start to cry or scream... even though she's with someone she loves and wants to be with. No amount of therapy in the world can cure that. Those images are in her head forever.

Rape is sometimes not so black and white. The shades of gray is where people get confused... was it really rape? was she asking for it? etc. If a woman truly feels that she's been violated, if something's been done that she did not want, if it was not consentual, then yes, I would consider that to be rape.

Let me close with a few definitions for you so you can see for yourself what the clinical definition of rape is and then make your own decisions:

Main Entry: rape
Function: noun
Date: 14th century
1 : an act or instance of robbing or despoiling or carrying away a person by force
2 a : sexual intercourse with a woman by a man without her consent and chiefly by force or deception; b : unlawful sexual intercourse by force or threat other than by a man with a woman
3 : an outrageous violation

Main Entry: date rape
Function: noun
Date: circa 1983
: rape committed by someone known to the victim

Main Entry: gang rape
Function: noun
Date: 1968
: rape of one person by several attackers in succession

Main Entry: statutory rape
Function: noun
Date: 1898
: sexual intercourse with a person who is below the statutory age of consent

(Thank you Merriam Webster 10th edition)