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lurkette told me EXACTLY the same thing when we were first looking at getting together. She was just off a "serious" relationship (I put that in quotes, because it was only six months long--plenty serious at the time, but looking back....) that ended suddenly and with no explanation on his part. She was hurt, trying to figure out what she'd done wrong, and then all of a sudden there I was. She wasn't looking for a relationship, you can be damn sure.
That was 12 years ago. We've been married for 8 of those years.
What did it take? Persistence, my boy. Sheer cussed persistence.
Here's what I recommend. Make sure SHE knows that YOU know she's not out for a relationship. Deal with yourself until you AGREE that she shouldn't be out for a relationship right now, there's no argument about that for you. And at the same time, make CERTAIN that she knows you want a relationship with her. Hold that position until something happens.
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