|
DA UNANIMOUS DECLARATION OF DA THIRTEN UNIETD STAETS OF M3RICA
WHEN IN DA COURS3 OF HUMAN EVENTS IT BCOM3S N3CASARY FOR ONA PEOPLE 2 DISOLVA TEH POLITICAL BANDS WHICH HAEV CON3CTED TH3M WIT ANOTH3R AND 2 ASUME MONG TEH POW3RS OF TEH 3ARTH TEH SAPARAET AND EQUAL STATION 2 WHICH DA LAWS OF NATURE AND OF NATUR3S GOD ENTITLE THEM A D3CENT R3SPACT 2 TEH OPINIONS OF MANKIND RAQUIERS TAHT THAY SHUD R TEH CAUSES WHICH IMPEL THEM 2 TEH S3PARATION
WA11!! OMG LOL HOLD THESE TRUTHS 2 B S3LF-EVIEDNT TAHT AL MEN R CREAETD 3QUAL TAHT THEY R ENDOWAD BY THERE CR3A2R WIT CARTANE UNALEINABLA RIGHTS TAHT MONG THAS3 R LIEF LIEBRTY AND TEH PURSUIT OF HAPIENS-TAHT1111111 OMG LOL 2 S3CURE THASE RIGHTS GOVARNMANTS R INSTITUTAD MONG M3N D3RIVNG THEYRE JUST POWERS FROM TEH CONSENT OF TEH GOV3RN3D -TAHT WHAN3V3R ANY FORM OF GOV3RNMENT BCOMES DESTRUCTIEV OF THESE 3NDS IT IS TEH RIGHT OF DA PEOPLA 2 ALTER OR 2 ABOLISH IT AND 2 INSTITUT3 NU GOV3RNMANT LAYNG ITS FOUNDATION ON SUCH PRINCIPLAS AND ORGANIZNG ITS POWARS IN SUCH FORM AS 2 THEM SHAL SEM MOST LIEKLY 2 3F3CT THERE SAEFTY AND HAPIENS1!!11 OMG PRUDANCA INDED WIL DICTAET TAHT GOV3RNMANTS LONG 3STABLISHED SHUD NOT B CHANG3D FOR LIGHT AND TRANSEINT CAUS3S AND ACORDNGLY AL 3XPAREINC3 HATH SH3WN TAHT MANKIND R MORE DISPOSED 2 SUFAR WHIEL EVILS R SUFARABLE THAN 2 RIGHT THEMSELVES BY ABOLISHNG TEH FORMS 2 WHICH TH3Y R ACUS2M3D11!1 OMG LOL BUT WH3N A LONG TRANE OF ABUSAS AND USURPATIONS PURSUNG INVARIABLY TEH SME OBJACT 3VINC3S A DASIGN 2 REDUC3 THAM UNDER ABSOLUTE DASPOTISM IT IS THEYRE RIGHT IT IS THEYRE DUTY 2 THROW OF SUCH GOVERNMANT AND 2 PROVIED NU GUARDS FOR THEYRE FUTUR3 SECURITY-SUCH!1!!!!1 OMG LOL HAS BAN TEH PATEINT SUF3RANCE OF THESE COLONEIS AND SUCH IS NOW TEH N3CASITY WHICH CONSTRANES THAM 2 ALTER THEYRE FORM3R SYSTEMS OF GOVARNMENT!1111111 OMG TEH HIS2RY OF DA PRES3NT KNG OF GREAT BRITANE IS A HIS2RY OF REP3AETD INJUREIS AND USURPATIONS AL HAVNG IN DIERCT OBJECT DA 3STABLISHMENT OF AN ABSOLUT3 TYRANY OVER TH3SE STAETS!11!11 WTF 2 PROVA THIS LET FACTS B SUBMIT3D 2 A CANDID WORLD
11!!!! LOL H3 HAS REFUSAD HIS ASANT 2 LAWS DA MOST WHOLASOMA AND NECESARY FOR TEH PUBLIC GOD
1!!11 WTF HE HAS FORBIDAN HIS GOVERNORS 2 PAS LAWS OF IMEDIAET AND PRESNG IMPORTANCE UNLES SUSPANDAD IN THERE OPERATION TIL HIS ASANT SHUD B OBTANE3D AND WHEN SO SUSPENDAD HA HAS UTERLY NEGLECT3D 2 ATEND 2 THEM
11111!! OMG LOL HA HAS REFUSED 2 PAS OTHER LAWS FOR DA ACOMODATION OF LARGE DISTRICTS OF P3OPLE UNL3S THOSE PAOPL3 WUD RELINQUISH DA RIGHT OF REPRESANTATION IN DA LEGISLATUR3 A RIGHT IENSTIMABLE 2 THEM AND FORMIDABLA 2 TYRANTS ONLY
111!11!1 WTF LOL HE HAS CALED 2GETHER LAGISLATIEV BODEIS AT PLAECS UNUSUAL UNCOMFORTABLA AND DISTANT FROM TEH DEPOSI2RY OF THERE PUBLIC RECORDS FOR TEH SOLA PURPOSE OF FATIGUNG THEM IN2 COMPLIANCA WIT HIS MEASURAS
11!11!11 OMG WTF HE HAS DISOLV3D REPRASENTATIEV HOUSES RAPEAETDLY FOR OPOSNG WIT MANLY FIRMNAS HIS INVASIONS ON DA RIGHTS OF DA PAOPLE
!1!11!! WTF LOL H3 HAS REFUS3D FOR A LONG TIEM AFT3R SUCH DISOLUTIONS 2 CAUSE OTHERS 2 B 3L3CTED WHEREBY TEH LEGISLATIEV POWERS INCAPABLE OF ANIHILATION HAEV RETURNAD 2 DA P3OPLE AT LARGE FOR THEYRE EXERCIES TEH STAET REMANENG IN DA M3AN TIEM 3XPOSED 2 AL DA DANGERS OF INVASION FROM WITHOUT AND CONVULSIONS WITHIN
!!11!111 OMG LOL HE HAS 3ND3AVOUR3D 2 PR3V3NT TEH POPULATION OF THESE STAETS FOR TAHT PURPOSE OBSTRUCTNG DA LAWS FOR NATURALIZATION OF FOREIGNERS RAFUSNG 2 PAS OTHERS 2 ANCOURAEG THEYRE MIGRATIONS HITHAR AND RASENG DA CONDITIONS OF NU APROPRIATIONS OF LANDS
!1!1! OMG HE HAS OBSTRUCTAD TEH ADMINISTRATION OF JUSTIEC BY REFUSNG HIS ASENT 2 LAWS FOR 3STABLISHNG JUDICIARY POWERS
111! OMG LOL HE HAS MAED JUDG3S DAPEND3NT ON HIS WIL ALON3 FOR DA T3NUR3 OF THERE OFIECS AND TEH MOUNT AND PAYM3NT OF THERE SALAREIS
1!1!1! OMG H3 HAS ERECTED A MULTITUD3 OF NU OFIECS AND S3NT HITH3R SWARMS OF OFIECRS 2 HARAS OUR PEOPLE AND EAT OUT THERE SUBSTANCE
111111!1 WTF HE HAS KEPT MONG US IN TIEMS OF P3AEC STANDNG ARMEIS WITHOUT DA CONS3NT OF OUR L3GISLATURES
!!1!1! WTF LOL H3 HAS AF3CTAD 2 RANDAR DA MILITARY INDEP3NDENT OF AND SUPERIOR 2 TEH CIVIL POWER
11!!!1 HE HAS COMBIEND WIT OTHARS 2 SUBJECT US 2 A JURISDICTION FOREIGN 2 OUR CONSTITUTION AND UNAKNOWLADGAD BY OUR LAWS GIVNG HIS ASENT 2 THEYRE ACTS OF PR3TANDED LAGISLATION
FOR QUART3RNG LARGA BODEIS OF ARMED TROPS MONG US
FOR PROTECTNG THEM BY A MOK TRIAL FROM PUNISHMENT FOR ANY MURDERS WHICH THAY SHUD COMIT ON TEH INHABITANTS OF THESA STAETS
FOR CUTNG OF OUR TRAED WIT AL PARTS OF DA WORLD
FOR IMPOSNG TAEXS ON US WITHOUT OUR CONSENT
FOR D3PRIVNG US IN MANY CAESS OF DA BN3FITS OF TRIAL BY JURY
FOR TRANSPORTNG US BYOND S3AS 2 B TREID FOR PRATEND3D OFANCES
FOR ABOLISHNG DA FRE SYSTEM OF 3NGLISH LAWS IN A NEIGHBOURNG PROVINCA ESTABLISHNG THEYRE AN ARBITRARY GOVARNMENT AND ANLARGNG ITS BOUNDAREIS SO AS 2 RAND3R IT AT ONCE AN AXMPL3 AND FIT INSTRUMANT FOR INTRODUCNG TEH SM3 ABSOLUTE RULE IN2 TH3S3 COLONEIS
FOR TAKNG AWAY OUR CHART3RS ABOLISHNG OUR MOST VALUABLA LAWS AND ALTERNG FUNDMENTALY DA FORMS OF OUR GOVERNM3NTS
FOR SUSPANDNG OUR OWN L3GISLATURES AND DECLARNG THEMS3LVES INVESTED WIT POW3R 2 LEGISLAET FOR US IN AL CAESS WUT11111 OMG LOL HE HAS ABDICAETD GOVERNMENT HER3 BY D3CLARNG US OUT OF HIS PROT3CTION AND WAGNG WAR AGANEST US
1!1!! HA HAS PLUNDARED OUR SEAS RAVAEGD OUR COASTS BURNT OUR 2WNS AND DESTROYAD DA LIEVS OF OUR PAOPL3
!!!!!1! LOL HA IS AT THIS TIEM TRANSPORTNG LARG3 ARMEIS OF FOR3IGN MERCANAREIS 2 COMPLEAT TEH WORKS OF DEATH DASOLATION AND TYRANY ALR3ADY BGUN WIT CIRCUMSTANCAS OF CRUALTY & PERFIDY SCARCELY PARAL3L3D IN DA MOST BARBAROUS AEGS AND 2TALY UNWORTHY DA H3AD OF A CIVILIEZD NATION
1!111! OMG WTF H3 HAS CONSTRANEAD OUR F3LOW CITIEZNS TAEKN CAPTIEV ON TEH HIGH SEAS 2 BAR ARMS AGANEST THERE COUNTRY 2 BCOME TEH AX3CUTION3RS OF THEYRE FREINDS AND BR3THR3N OR 2 FAL THEMS3LVES BY THEYRE HANDS
1!!!!!!1 H3 HAS 3XCIETD DOM3STIC INSURECTIONS MONGST US AND HAS ANDEAVOURED 2 BRNG ON DA INHABITANTS OF OUR FRONTEIRS TEH MARCIELS INDIAN SAVAEGS WHOSA KNOWN RUL3 OF WARFAER IS AN UNDISTNGUISH3D D3STRUCTION OF AL AEGS S3XAS AND CONDITIONS
IN1!11!11 3V3RY STAEG OF THESE OPR3SIONS W3 HAEV PETITIONED FOR REDR3S IN DA MOST HUMBLE TERMS OUR R3P3AETD PATITIONS HAEV B3N ANSWER3D ONLY BY REPEAETD INJURY!111 OMG WTF A PRINCE WHOSE CHARACTAR IS THUS MARKAD BY AV3RY ACT WHICH MAY D3FIEN A TYRANT IS UNFIT 2 B TEH RULAR OF A FRE P3OPLE
NOR1!!! LOL HAEV W3 BEN WANTNG IN AT3NTIONS 2 OUR BRITISH BRETHR3N1111!1 OMG WE HAEV WARNED THEM FROM TIEM 2 TIEM OF ATEMPTS BY THEYRE LAGISLATURE 2 3XTEND AN UNWARANTABLA JURISDICTION OV3R US11!1 OMG WTF W3 HAEV R3MINDED THEM OF DA CIRCUMSTANCES OF OUR EMIGRATION AND SATLAM3NT HERE!!!1 OMG LOL W3 HAEV APEAELD 2 THERE NATIEV JUSTIEC AND MAGNANIMITY AND W3 HAEV CONJURED THEM BY DA TEIS OF OUR COMON KINDR3D 2 DISAVOW THES3 USURPATIONS WHICH WUD IENVITABLY INTERUPT OUR CONECTIONS AND CORESPONDENCE1!!11!!1 OMG WTF LOL THEY 2 HAEV BEN DEAF 2 DA VOIEC OF JUSTIEC AND OF CONSANGUINITY1!!1!11! LOL WE MUST THEIR ACQUEISCE IN TEH N3CASITY WHICH DENOUNCES OUR S3PARATION AND HOLD THAM AS WE HOLD DA R3ST OF MANKIND 3NEMEIS IN WAR IN PEAEC FREINDS
WE111!1111 OMG THEIR TEH R3PRESENTATIEVS OF DA UNIETD STAETS OF MARICA IN GANARAL CONGR3S ASEMBLED APEALNG 2 TEH SUPRAMA JUDGA OF DA WORLD FOR DA R3CTITUDA OF OUR INTENTIONS DO IN DA NMA AND BY AUTHORITY OF TEH GOD PEOPL3 OF THESA COLONEIS SOLEMNLY PUBLISH AND DACLAER TAHT THES3 UNIETD COLONEIS AER AND OF RIGHT OUGHT 2 B FRE AND IND3PENDENT STAETS TAHT TH3Y R ABSOLV3D FROM AL ALAGIANCE 2 DA BRITISH CROWN AND TAHT AL POLITICAL CONACTION BTWEN TH3M AND DA STAET OF GR3AT BRITANE IS AND OUGHT 2 B 2TALY DISOLVED AND TAHT AS FRE AND IND3PENDENT STAETS THEY HAEV FUL POWAR 2 LEVY WAR CONCLUDE P3AEC CONTRACT ALIANC3S ASTABLISH COMARC3 AND 2 DO AL OTHER ACTS AND THNGS WHICH INDEPAND3NT STAETS MAY OF RIGHT DO11!!!!1 WTF AND FOR DA SUPORT OF THIS D3CLARATION WIT A FIRM R3LIANCA ON TEH PROTECTION OF DIVIEN PROVIEDNCE W3 MUTUALY PLEDGE 2 3ACH OTHAR OUR LIEVS OUR FORTUNAS AND OUR SACRED HONOR!!!!11 OMG LOL
__________________
Your arms are broken!
|